yep.

don’t buy it.

our younger brothers and sisters might eat a tide pod and get us blamed for it, but we have more in common with them than we ever had with boomers or gen x.

brain gremlin no.1: KISS. kiss. kiiiiiiiiiiiisssss. KIS.ᴋɪss. ᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢᵏᶦˢˢ

the tree had grown a root up through the center of it & out through the sides

They used to cross the road, probably, no definitely, without looking left and right. And they got squished.

Environmentalists had a hell of a job, keeping them in their lane. Traffic would have to be blocked for the duration.

But now, they have a lovely bridge, and no one has to ask: Why did the Christmas Island Crab cross the road, if they’re just gonna get squished?

Answer: They want to hit the beach. Because that’s where they like to have sex. And because the mummy crabs like to throw their eggs into the ocean after they’ve spawned them in the burrows that the daddy crab so kindly digs on the beach.

Look at them scurrying over their bridge, the smell of the ocean in their noses, the thought of copulation driving them on…

Whew! Finally, made it to the beach…now The Sex can begin!

Mission accomplished… And a few weeks later after a float in the ocean…

Back come the ankle biters…to the rainforest where they live.