The Time of Retribution

goodbye $200 helloooo 3 groceries

listen to me, this is so so important: you've gotta get used to really giving it your 60% as a default. like don't half-ass it necessarily but try not to go over 70% or so of an ass. you'll feel better and live a happier more fulfilled life, and on the rare occasions where you do need to lock the fuck in you'll be able to pull off bullshit that the sad miserable wretches giving it their 100% can never dream of, because they're busy draining themselves dry and you have energy reserves to spare.

big life tips dont be neurodivergent dont be poor dont get in any sort of situation and dont let yourself need or crave

not getting good reports back on your progress with this guys

Funny when someone introduces you to something, you get really into it, and then they lose all interest in it. Oh so you’re just going to abandon me at the party you invited me to. Dude you were my ride.

MY FINGERS BARELY EVEN TOUCHED YOUR STUPID FUCKING AD STOP REDIRECTING ME TO THE APP STORE

someone needs to invent reverse cornflakes. i want to eat a cereal that gives me a demonic erection and inflicts upon me an insatiable lust

getting increasingly confused trying to have sex with my point and click wife but she just keeps saying “you cant use that here”

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich