Ask-Cap-and-Jack

After putting my writing on hold for several weeks, I decided to jump back in. I expected to find all sorts of problems with my story–inconsistencies in the plot, lack of transitions, poor characterization–the works. But what began to stick out to me was something to which I’d given little thought in writing.

Filter words.

What are Filter Words?

Actually, I didn’t even know these insidious creatures had a name until I started combing the internet for info.

Filter words are those that unnecessarily filter the reader’s experience through a character’s point of view. Dark Angel’s Blog says:

“Filtering” is when you place a character between the detail you want to present and the reader. The term was started by Janet Burroway in her book On Writing.

In terms of example, you should watch out for:

To see

To hear

To think

To touch

To wonder

To realize

To watch

To look

To seem

To feel (or feel like)

Can

To decide

To sound (or sound like)

To know

I’m being honest when I say my manuscript is filled with these words, and the majority of them need to be edited out.

What do Filter Words Look Like?

Let’s imagine a character in your novel is walking down a street during peak hour.

You might, for example, write:

Sarah felt a sinking feeling as she realized she’d forgotten her purse back at the cafe across the street. She saw cars filing past, their bumpers end-to-end. She heard the impatient honk of horns and wondered how she could quickly cross the busy road before someone took off with her bag. But the traffic seemed impenetrable, and she decided to run to the intersection at the end of the block.

Eliminating the bolded words removes the filters that distances us, the readers, from this character’s experience:

Sarah’s stomach sank. Her purse—she’d forgotten it back at the cafe across the street. Cars filed past, their bumpers end-to-end. Horns honked impatiently. Could she make it across the road before someone took off with her bag? She ran past the impenetrable stream of traffic, toward the intersection at the end of the block.

Are Filter Words Ever Acceptable?

Of course, there are usually exceptions to every rule.

Just because filter words tend to be weak doesn’t mean they never have a place in our writing. Sometimes they are helpful and even necessary.

Susan Dennard of Let The Words Flow writes that we should use filter words when they are critical to the meaning of the sentence.

If there’s no better way to phrase something than to use a filter word, then it’s probably okay to do so.

Want to know more?

Read these other helpful articles on filter words and more great writing tips:

Filter Words and Distancing Point of View

The Reasons Editors reject Manuscripts

Here is a detailed character meme to fill in! (If you’re stuck on some of the questions, check the prompts here.)

Full name

[name here]

Preferred name/nickname

[name here]

Generally referred to as

[name here]

Appearance.

FACECLAIM: [Do you have a faceclaim for your character?] SEX: [Is their anatomy male, female, or other? Was this always the case?] HEIGHT: [how tall/short are they?] WEIGHT: [how heavy/light are they?] BUILD: [Thin? Fat? Bulky? Muscular? Toned? etc] HAIR: [describe their hair, is it long or short? Soft or course? Do they style it a certain way? Do they dye it?] SKIN: [What colour is their skin? Is it rough or smooth? Is it soft or hard? Note: feel free to change this to fur/scales etc if that’s more appropriate for your character!] EYES: [What colour are their eyes? Do they have a distinctive sparkle or do they look kind of dull and tired? Long or short eyelashes? Eye bags? Wrinkles? Hooded lids?] MOUTH: [Big mouth or small? Plump lips or thin lips? Perfect white teeth or crooked, gappy ones?] NOSE: [Big or little? Pointy or bulbousy? Huge, cavernous nostrils or teeny little ones?] HANDS: [Big or small? Manicured fingernails? Claws? Wrinkles? Visible veins? Bony knuckles? Or smooth skin and soft features?] FEET: [Big or small? Bony or plump? Trimmed toenails? Claws?] SCARS: [Any visible scars?] CLOTHES: [What is their clothing style?] OTHER FEATURES: [Optional for non-human characters, or human characters with uncommon features] OTHER NOTEABLE FEATURES: [Optional - anything you need to mention that isn’t covered by the above.]

Speech.

VOICECLAIM: [For those without faceclaims - do you have a voiceclaim for your character?] ACCENT: [Do they have an accent?] VERBAL TICKS: [Any verbal ticks? Such as a tendency to stutter, repeat themselves, stumble over their words, etc.] LANGUAGE: [What language(s) do they speak? If more than one, are they fluent in all these languages?] ARTICULATION: [Do they tend to be good at explaining things, or can they be clumsy with words when trying to explain something?] EDUCATION: [Do they tend to use a lot of long words? Do they ever show off about how many big words they use? Or do they prefer to use short, simple language?] LAUGHTER: [What is their laugh like? Do they laugh a lot, or not very often?] GRUMP: [Do they ever grumble, sneer, or grunt about things?] BREATHING: [Do they tend to gasp, sigh, humph or sniff at things?]

Mannerisms.

FACE: [Do they have an expressive face? Do they show their emotions in their face? Or do they tend to have a poker face most of the time?] HANDS: [Do they make a lot of hand gestures? What kind of gestures do they use?] LEGS/FEET: [Do they tap their feet or jiggle their leg?] EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS: [Are they prone to these? Do they tend to cry or yell when they’re upset, or laugh and jump about when they’re happy?] HABITS: [Do they have any habits, like humming or singing or fidgeting or fiddling?] POSTURE: [Do they usually stand straight and to attention, or do they tend to slump? Does their posture change with their mood? How does it change?] WALKING POSTURE: [How do they walk? Do they skip gleefully along, do they march like a soldier, do they slump their shoulders and stomp around?] SITTING POSTURE: [How do they like to sit? Cross legged? Slouched? Feet apart or together?] PERSONAL SPACE: [Do they like to maintain a personal bubble, or does it bother them when people get in their personal space? Do they tend to be respecful of others’ personal space?] SPACIAL AWARENESS: [Are they good at noticing what’s around their physical space? Or do they tend to be clumsy and bump into things?] OTHER: [Optional - anything not covered by the above.]

Health:

DIET: [What do they like to eat? Do they have a healthy, well-balanced diet? Do they eat a lot of junk food? Or do they sometimes forget to eat?] SLEEP: [Do they sleep a lot? Or not a lot? Do they go to bed late, or do they sleep early and get up early? Are they prone to nightmares or strange dreams?] EXERCISE: [Do they work out a lot? Too much, not enough, or just right?] ACTIVITY: [Do they tend to work hard and exhaust themselves? Or are they pretty lazy? Or somewhere in between?] CLEANLINESS: [Do they bathe regularly? Are they meticulous about washing?] ODOUR: [Do they have any particular body odour (good or bad)?] MEDICINAL DRUGS: [Any medicinal drugs taken?] NARCOTICS: [Any recreational drugs taken?] ADDICTIONS: [Any physical addictions?] ILLNESS: [Any physical ailments?] INJURIES: [Any injuries that never completely healed, and still cause trouble?] PARASITES: [Do they have fleas or any other parasites?] OTHER: [Optional - anything not covered by the above.]

Personal.

INTROVERT/EXTROVERT?: [Is your character one of these? How does that manifest in their life?] OPTIMIST/PESSIMIST: [Which of these are they? Or are they in between?] GENDER: [What is the character’s gender, if any? Do they feel that their gender matches their anatomy?] SEXUALITY: [What type of person do they feel sexual attraction for, if any? Do they have a preference for one sex/gender in particular? Do they prefer their own race/species, or another? Is their any type of person they absolutely would NOT want to get into bed with? Or do they have no preference?] ROMANTIC: [Are they inclined towards romance? Do they enjoy lots of romance, a little, or do they prefer no romance at all? Do they see themselves married with kids one day, or would they prefer to be alone?] MEMORY: [Do they have a good memory? Or are they forgetful? Are they good at remembering certain things and not others?] PLANNING: [Are they good at planning? Do they spend a lot of time planning or do they tend to leap right into things?] PENSIVE: [Do they spend a lot of time thinking over their actions, their life, their problems, etc?] INTUITION: [Are they good at making the right decisions, or at figuring things out from minimal clues?] PROBLEM SOLVING: [Are they good at dealing with puzzles and problems?] GOALS: [What is their main goal in life? Do they have any short-term goals?] INSECURITIES: [Is there anything they are insecure about? Do they hide their insecurities well? Do they affect the way they live their life?] ACHIEVEMENTS: [Anything they’re especially proud of?] ANXIETY: [What, if anything, causes the character to feel anxiety?] OVERWHELMED: [Do they ever feel like things are just too much?] SELF-HELP: [How do they deal with their life problems?] COMFORTS: [What helps the character to feel comfortable and happy?] BAD HABITS: [Do they have any bad habits?] PHILOSOPHY: [Do they have any religious or philosophical beliefs? What are they?] TRIGGERS: [Do they have any triggers?]

The Past.

PARENTS/GUARDIANS: [Did they have a good relationship with their parents while they were growing up?] SCHOOL: [Did they do well at school, or did they struggle?] ADOLESCENCE: [How did puberty go? Was it a hard change? What was particularly hard (or easy) about it?] LEAVING HOME: [What was it like for them leaving home for the first time? What prompted them to move out of the home they grew up in?] FURTHER EDUCATION: [Did they go to college? University? What did they study, and how well did they do?] FIRST JOB: [What was their first job? Did they enjoy it?] LIFE EVENTS: [Did they have any important life events that affected the route their life took? This could be something traumatic or it could be something pleasant like graduating with good grades.] WORST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: [What happened?] BEST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: [What happened?] LESSONS: [What are the most important things they have learned through experience?] LOOKING BACK: [If they could re-play their life and do something differently, what would they do?]

Relationships.

FAMILY: [Who, if anyone, does the character consider their family? Are these blood relatives? And do they have a good relationship with their family?] FRIENDSHIPS: [Do they have lots of friends, or just one or two close friends? What do they look for in a friend?] FRIENDS IN NEED: [How do they help a friend who is going through hard times? Do they offer advice and support, or do they feel uncomfortable, not knowing what to say?] NEEDING A FRIEND: [Do they tend to go to friends when they need help and support? Or do they deal with their problems on their own? Do their friends ever worry about them?] ANNOYANCES: [How do they deal with arguments and disagreements with friends or partner?] ROMANCE: [If applicable: how do they woo a potential partner? What do they look for in a potential partner?] MARITAL PROBLEMS: [How do they deal with problems in their love life? Do they talk it through with their partner? Or do they bury their head in the sand?] ADVERSARIES: [What would turn them off a friendship or romance?] ENEMIES: [What would make them hate someone enough to call them an enemy?] STRANGERS: [Do they tend to be respectful to strangers, or are they careless towards anyone who they don’t consider a friend?] FUN STUFF: [What kind of things do they like doing with a friend?] DATING: [What kind of things to they like doing with a romantic partner?] BEST FRIEND: [If applicable - who do they consider their best friend?] LOVE: [If applicable - who do they consider to be the love of their life?] WORST ENEMY: [If applicable - who do they consider to be their worst enemy?] RESPECT: [Do they respect their enemies, even if they don’t like them? Is there anyone they disrespect? Why?]

Interactions.

MINGLING: [Do they get along well with others, in general? Or are they bad at making new friends?] COMFORT LEVELS: [Do they feel comfortable talking to people? What might others do that could make them uncomfortable?] PHYSICAL: [Do they tend to be touchy-feely? Do they hug people or pat them on the back> Or do they prefer not to touch anyone?] GROUPS: [Are the comfortable in a big group? Or do they prefer to spend time with just one or two people?] OPENNESS: [Do they tend to open up easily? Or does it take them a while to open up to someone?] GENEROSITY: [Do they like to buy gifts and treats for others? Would they be willing to lend money to a friend? How do they feel about people buying gifts for them?] JEALOUSY: [What might make them feel jealous towards somebody else? Is there anyone they are jealous of, or have been jealous of in the past? How do they deal with jealousy?] TEMPER: [Are they easily worked up or do they have a lot of patience?] EMPATHY: [Are they able to empathise with another person’s feelings? Or do they tend to be clumsy and put their foot in it? Or do they just not care who they hurt?] AFFECTION: [How do they show affection for others?] DISTASTE: [How do they show that they dislike someone?] ETIQUETTE: [Do they tend to stick to the polite norms of social situations, or can they sometimes be rude or inappropriate?] RESPONSIBILITY: [Do they admit when they’re wrong? If they make a mistake, do they try to correct it?] SELF ESTEEM: [Do they tend to stick up for themselves or do they let others push them around? Why?] CONFIDENCE: [Do they care what others think of them?] HONESTY: [Do they always speak their thoughts honestly? Or will they keep things private if they feel that it might upset someone?] LEADER OR FOLLOWER: [Which one are they? Or are they neither?] PARTY TRICKS: [Do they have any special skills or talents that impress other people and gain them praise?] PRAISE: [Are they comfortable accepting compliments?] FAILURES: [Is there anything they do that makes people annoyed or irritated?] CRITICISM: [How do they take criticism?] INSULTS: [How do they take insults?] EMBARRASSMENT: [Are they easily embarrassed? How do they handle embarrassment?] FLIRTING: [Are they flirtatious? Why?] ATTENTION SPAN: [Are they able to concentrate on lots of things? Can they hold their concentration well? Or are they easily distracted?] SITUATIONS: [Are they good at dealing with difficult social situations? Such as an argument or someone getting upset?]

Life.

But then Person A finally gets to be alone and gets to their room and looks at the bed and realizes that it’s suddenly a lot bigger. And they’re too short to reach the blinds to close them, and that was always Person B’s job. And they’ll never fold clothes for someone else again, never need to ask someone to turn off the light, never try to stop them from snoring. And then moving away from it all, trying to forget, holding back tears in the kitchen cradling a cup of tea they realize that Person B will never drink tea with them again. And they’ll never help them reach their mug. And when they drop it to the floor, shattering it into millions of helpless individuals there is no one there to tell them not to move, not to step on the glass, not to cut themselves. That the mug has no worth because it’s worth was in the adventures of cleaning up the pieces and remembering it as it was. 

There is no one to stop them from hurting. And there is no one to drink tea.

No problem! And sorry about not answering sooner, I was on vacation. To make it up to you, I’ve made one of my trademark Long Posts about it.

TIPS ON HOW TO WRITE PAIN (FOR BOTH ORIGINAL CONTENT WRITERS AND FANFICTION WRITERS)

When I first started writing, about eight years ago, I had the same issue as @imjustafuckinggirl.

How are you supposed to write about pain you’ve never experienced before???

The characters in my book suffer through all sorts of terrible shit, and in no way am I writing from experience, which is marginally easier to do than write about something that has never happened to you.

However, with time, I managed to gather up a few strategies on how to write pain.

1. Don’t Write Paragraphs About It

I know, it’s tempting. You want to convey to the reader just how much pain the character is in, and you think that the pain will be emphasized the more you write about it.

This, however, is a lie.

As a reader, when I’m reading a book or fanfiction where, whenever the writer uses agonizingly long paragraphs to describe when a character is hurt, I skip it.

Entirely.

It’s boring and, quite frankly, unnecessary, especially during a fight or huge battle, which are supposed to be fast-paced.

When it comes to writing about pain, it really is about quality and not quantity.

In my own writing, I stick to short, quick paragraphs, some of them which are barely a line long. This gives it a faster pace and sort of parallels with the scattered, spread out thoughts of the character as they suffer.

2. Describe it Right

Many times, usually in fanfiction, writers over-exaggerate certain injuries.

This partially has to do with the fact that they’ve never experienced that injury before and are just thinking about what it might feel like.

As a girl with two brothers and who often participated in rough play-fights, I can assure you that getting punched is not as painful as you think it is.

(However, it does depend on the area, as well as how hard the punch is, on top of the fact that you have to take into account whether or not the punch broke bones)

I’m reading a high school AU where a character gets punched by a bully (Idk where they got punched it wasn’t stated) and the author is describing it like they’d been shot.

It was to the point where I was like Did the bully have brass knuckles or something????

It was very clear that this author had never been punched before.

When describing the pain of an injury or the injury itself, you have to take into account:

- What object was used to harm the character

- Where the injury is

- How long the character has had the injury

- (For blades) How deep the cut is

- (For blunt force trauma) How hard the hit was

- Whether or not the wound triggers other things (Ex: Concussion, vomiting, dizziness, infection, internal/external bleeding).

There’s also the fact that when some authors described wounds caused by blades such as knives, daggers, and swords, they never take into account the anatomy of a person and which places cause the most blood flow.

Obviously, a cut on your cheek will have less of a blood flow than a cut on your wrist, depending on what the blade hits, and I hope that everyone consults a diagram of veins, capillaries, arteries, etc. when they’re describing blood flow from a certain place.

There’s also the fact that you have to take into account where the blood is coming from. Veins? Arteries?

The blood from arteries will be a brighter red, like vermilion, than the blood from veins, which is the dark crimson everyone likes to talk about.

Not all places gush bright red blood, people!

3. DIFFERENT INJURIES HAVE DIFFERENT KINDS OF PAIN

Here, let me explain.

A punch feels different from a slap.

A broken arm feels different from getting stabbed.

A fall feels different from a dog bite.

I’ll give you a list of all the kinds of things that can be described for the three most common kinds of injuries that happen in stories:

Punch/Blunt Force Trauma

How it feels:

- Aching

- Numbness (In the later stages)

- A single spike of pain before it fades into an ache

- Throbbing

Effects:

- Vomiting (If the character is punched in the gut)

- Swelling

- Bruising

- Broken bones

- Unconsciousness (Blow to the head)

- Dizziness (Blow to the head)

- Concussion (Also a blow to the head)

- Internal bleeding

- Death (In the case of concussions and internal bleeding and broken bones- ribs can pierce lungs)

Stab Wound/Cut

How it feels:

- Stinging (only shallow wounds have just stinging)

- Burning

- With stab wounds, I feel like describing the effects of it make it more powerfully felt by the reader

Effects:

- Bleeding (Consult chart of the circulatory system beforehand for the amount of blood flow that should be described and what color the blood should be)

- Dizziness (Heavy blood loss)

- Unconsciousness

- Infection (if left unattended)

- Death

Gunshot

How it feels:

- Depends on the caliber bullet, from how far away they were shot (point-blank range is nothing like being shot from a distance), and in what place. Do careful research and then make your decision.

Effects:

- Bleeding(Consult chart of the circulatory system beforehand for the amount of blood flow that should be described and what color the blood should be. Also take into effect the above variables for blood flow as well.)

- Dizziness (Heavy blood loss)

- Infection (if left unattended)

- Death

Some things that a character may do while they’re injured:

- Heavy/Harsh/Ragged breathing

- Panting

- Making noises of pain

gasping

grunting

hissing

groaning

whimpering

yelping (when the injury is inflicted)

screaming

shrieking

wailing

- Crying/ Weeping/Sobbing/Etc.

- Clenching their teeth

- Unable to speak

- Pressing their hands against a stab wound/cut to try and stem the bleeding

- Eyesight going out of whack (vision blurring and tilting, the room spinning, black spots consuming sight)

- Eyes rolling up into their head

- Trembling/shaking

- Ears riniging (from gunshot)

writing a bitchy character (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10)

writing a cocky character (1,2,3,4)

writing a emotion character (1,2)

How to play a hippie

Playing the quiet character.

Portraying the shopaholic.

Portraying a mute character.

Portraying a kleptomaniac.

How to play the stalker.

Writing distant, indifferent characters.

How to write a character who stutters.

Writing a character who is sassy.

A guide to playing a southern character.

Portraying characters with crushes.

How to portray a teen mom.

How to play a character who is mean.

How to portray a character high on cocaine.

Writing a character who is high on amphetamines.

Playing an efficient male character.

Portraying the asshole.

Playing a character who suffers from shyness.

How to play a mentally ill/insane character.

Writing a character who self-harms.

Writing a happy character.

Writing a character who suffers from night terrors.

Writing a character with paranoid personality disorder.

How to play a victim of rape.

How to RP a blind character.

Writing a leader.

Writing a character with Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Writing a character with depression.

Writing a character who is homosexual.

Writing a character with schizophrenia.

Playing a fe/male character.

Writing a character with Nymphomania.

How to write a worry wart.

How to write a character with HPD.

How to write a bad ass character.

Playing a pansexual.

Tips on writing a drug addict.

Tips on writing the pregnant female.

Writing insane characters.

Playing a character under the influence of marijuana.

Portraying a character with diabetes.

How to play a prankster.

Playing a character who has been adopted.

Portraying a vampire.

Playing a character with an eating disorder.

Portraying a character who is anti-social.

Portraying a character who is depressed.

How to portray someone with dyslexia.

How to portray a character with bipolar disorder.

Portraying a character with severe depression.

How to play a serial killer.

Writing a tomboy.

Playing a pyromaniac.

How to write a mute character.

How to write a character with an OCD.

How to play a stoner.

How to write an asexual character.

How to play a bitchy/vicious character.

How to play a character with HPD.

Playing a pregnant woman.

Playing the burn-out.

Writing a “nice” character.

How to play a gentleman.

How to play a shy/introvert character.

How to play a naive character.

Playing characters with memory loss.

How to write a character who smokes.

How to write pirates.

How to write characters with PTSD.

How to play a character who isn’t ready for sex.

How to play the geek.

Playing the manipulative character.

Portraying a character with borderline personality disorder.

Playing a character with Orthorexia Nervosa.

Writing a character who lost someone important.

Playing the bullies.

Portraying the drug dealer.

Playing a rebellious character.

How to portray a sociopath.

How to play a swimmer.

Portraying a ballerina.

Playing a promiscuous male.

Playing a character with cancer.

How to portray a bubbly character.

How to portray a power driven character.

How to portray the shy character.

Playing a character under the influence of drugs.

Playing a character who struggles with Bulimia.

Portraying a hippie.

Portraying sexually/emotionally abused characters.

Playing a character with asthma.

Portraying characters who have secrets.

Portraying a recovering alcoholic.

Portraying a sex addict.

How to play someone creepy.

Portraying a foreigner.

Portraying an emotionally detached character.

How to play a character with social anxiety.

Portraying a character who is high.

How to play a strong, female character.

Writing a character with a hangover.

Playing angry characters.

Playing a character who is smarter than you.

Playing and writing autistic characters.

Portraying a trans character.

How to portray a dominant character.

Playing a character who is faking a disorder.

Playing a prisoner.

Playing the opposite sex.

Portraying a character who has PTSD.

Playing a character who stutters.

How to play a depressed character who self-harms.

Portraying the “dumb” character.

How to portray a lesbian.

How to play a blind character.

How to play a sexual assault victim.

Writing a compulsive gambler.

Playing a werewolf.

Writing a character who is drunk.

Playing a Brit.

Portraying a character with amnesia.

Playing heroes.

Portraying a witty character.

How to play a vampire.

How to play a character who is manipulative.

Portraying the natural born leader.

Portraying the character who is flirtatious.

Writing a nice character.

How to portray a character who has asthma.

Playing a character with ADHD.

Amnesia

Children

Losing Someone (2)

Physical Injuries (2, 3)

Sexual Abuse (2)

Fight Scenes (2, 3, 4)

Horror

Torture

How to Describe the Body Shape of Female Characters

Character Appearance Help

Words to Describe Voice

Character Development Exercises

Art of Character Development

Introducing Characters

Characters You Need to Reinvent

Making Characters Likable

Heroes and Villains

Understanding Body Language

Mental Illness in Writing

Conflicts and Characters

NaNoPlanMo Resource Masterpost Navigation

Welcome to day fourteen of WC’s NaNoPlanMo! Today’s focus is on personality development, character arcs and character relationships!

Personality Development Through Character Traits

Creating Unique Characters from @lets-get-fictional

The 10 Elements of a Main Character from @thatkatiecooney

Design A Personality: Building Rock Solid Character Traits

Virtue and Vice Development Method from @writeworld

Building a Balanced Character

Character Trait Lists

36 Core Values for Building Character

Neutral Character Traits from @macklinassists

123 Ideas for Character Flaws

350 Character Traits

List of Character Traits

Another List of Character Traits

Character Arcs

K.M. Weiland: Writing Character Arcs

K.M. Weliand: Creating Stunning Character Arcs (Series)

Creating Character Arcs

How to Plot a Character Arc via @silvokrent

Why Character Arcs Make Readers Care

The Three Types of Character Arcs

Planning Character Arcs in a Nutshell

How to Figure Out Your Character’s Arc

Character Arcs and Motivations

Character Motivations: 7 Tips for Writing Better Portraits

How to Create Character Motivations

Motivate Your Characters Like a Pro

Six Emotional Motives for Your Characters

Inner Drives: What’s My Character’s Motivation?

Rethinking Motivation for Character Arcs

Character Relationships

Writing Healthy Couples in Fiction from @oliviapaigewrites

8 Secrets to Writing Strong Character Relationships

Character Relationships: 6 Tips for Crafting Real Connections

Why Character Relationships Make or Break Your Story

K.M. Weiland: What’s the Most Important Relationship in Your Story?

Writing Romance? Avoid These 5 Mistakes

The tone in writing is one of the most important characteristics of a piece of writing. Books, poetry, songs, articles, any writing whatsoever; the tone is everything. That being said, there are a lot of ways in which writers can either mess it up or completely forget to set the tone. Below is a guide to setting the tone to come across exactly how you want it to.

Some Things To Note

Tone is the character or attitude of a text that invokes emotion in the reader

There are two things you want to ask yourself when reading a text and studying the tone:

How does the text make you feel?

and

How is the text designed to make you feel?

Things That Create Tone

There are several different elements in writing that create the tone. Here are a few:

Body Language

How your characters act, interact, and speak all play a large role in how your readers perceive your story. If your characters are speaking cryptically, fidgeting, and the tensions are high, your readers will feel the suspense.

Volume (Dialogue Tags)

How loud people say things is a big indicator of how they mean for it to come across to whomever they’re talking to. It’s the same this with dialogue. While it’s important not to overdo it with the dialogue tags, you must also use them to your advantage. It’s kind of when you’re writing a script and you sometimes feel the need to add a note for the actor to say something a certain way in order for them to portray what you envision. Use specific dialogue tags sparingly, but use them well.

Context

The context of the situation is everything. If your reader doesn’t know what’s going on and your main character is super relaxed all of a sudden when they thought they were in the middle of a very stressful situation, it’s going to give them very weird vibes. Knowing where the character is, how they feel, and having some idea of what’s about to go down is imperative to creating the right tone.

WORD CHOICE

Word choice is the main way you can set the tone in your story. You must be clear, intentional, natural, and consistent with the way you choose how you phrase things in your story. We all have certain associations with specific words and using those associations will bode well for you.

Clear Word Choice…

Be clear before anything else when setting the tone. Portray what you need to in order to create the scene itself and put the reader in the story. Then change what words you’re using in order to make the reader feel a certain way. However, never sacrifice clarity in exchange for the use of a fancy word. If your read doesn’t know what you’re saying, what good does it do anyway?

Intentional Word Choice…

Be intentional when you’re deciding where to switch out words and where you decide to really hit the reader with a huge wave of tone. Don’t just fling words anywhere there’s a gap in the hopes that it will accomplish the same thing as intentionally injecting words where it will pierce the reader’s soul. See what I mean?

Natural Word Choice

While it’s important to choose words that fit the tone, they must flow naturally with the dialogue and descriptions. Don’t just slap your reader in the face with “OMG Becky did you hear what that brat Jessica said about you and your bae? She’s such a vacuous shrew!” because that’s not exactly natural is it? 

I have a whole post called Improving Flow In Writing that expands on this quite a bit.

Consistent Word Choice…

Be consistent in your word choice. Don’t use the same words over and over again, but don’t go from calling dogs to “canis lupus familiaris”. Well.. unless it’s absolutely necessary.

Examples Of Tones

Some of you might be a little fuzzy on what I mean by tone in the first place, so here are a few examples of tone:

Comedic

Suspenseful

Enticing

Desperate

Terrifying

Happy

Dramatic

Romantic

Etc.. You get the picture.

A list of reasons why a character may do something:

They’re selfless - They just can’t leave the kid that’s stuck despite the probability of them dying in the process of saving that kid.

They’re selfish - They just can’t do something because they’re too focused on what may happen to themselves

Their past - A dog once bit them when they were a young child and now they’re wary of dogs (doesn’t matter if they provoked the dog, bc people remember things like that)

They know way too much - As in, they might know the statistical probability of car crashes and therefor do not drive or get into cars (though of course, this isn’t the only example of this)

They’re naive/gullible - The character doesn’t see that clearly this person is against them because they just don’t pay attention enough/don’t see the warning signs.

Conspiracies - They just went way too deep into youtube and found way too many conspiracy videos and now everything is just a conspiracy. (Perfect example: Hodgins from Bones)

All of these could work for or against your character. Whether it be the secondary character that is too selfless and has to go back and save the main character, or the “villain” is just way to naive to see that your hero is taking apart their plan. Or maybe the MC got way into conspiracies and it led them to real conspiracies in the bad government they live in.

okay no shade at all I just want all of u to learn and grow and become better writers! so here’s a handy tip list!

we don’t stutter on every word. okay, sometimes it can seem it, but honestly, we don’t, so leave a few words in there to give your readers some breathing room.

we stutter more on specific sounds. for me, f and s sounds are big ones. everyone has their thing and most stutterers have sounds that are harder to get out.

we don’t just stutter at the beginning of words and sentences. okay, honestly this is a big one for me. sometimes, a word starts off really well and goes down the drain at the second syllable! and the stutter doesn’t disappear once we’ve made it past the first word - it clings in there, so don’t forget it.

some of us don’t always stutter. some, not all, of us have what’s known as an anxious stutter, which generally comes alongside anxiety disorders. so, while it may be usually present, when a person with an anxious stutter is particularly comfortable with a situation, it tends to get better (or even almost disappear).

we don’t stutter when we swear. this is why some of us can stutter and stutter and stutter on a word and then shout fuck and everything’s cool. as far as science knows, this is because swearing is from a more primitive part of the brain, and so it bypasses the bit that makes us stutter! it’s so cool honestly.

we don’t stutter when we sing. the biggest two reasons for this one is 1) music comes from a different part of the brain to talking (language=left; music=right), and so it once again bypasses the stutter, or 2) ‘easy voice’, which is the voice that people sing in, is softer and smoother, and the sounds are longer so there’s less opportunity to stutter. either option is way cool but we don’t stutter when we sing.

sometimes, we give up on words. after a certain amount of stuttering on a certain word, you may see a stutterer take a deep breath and either try again, or replace it with a synonym. sometimes that word just won’t fit right in our mouths!

we hate it when people try to guess what we’re trying to say or try to speed us up. this might be a more personal thing for me, but there’s nothing I hate more than that clicky sound people make or the weird hand gestures or being told to “spit it out.” because we can’t control this shit and it gets tiring. it’s better just to let the person get it out and take their time with it, so when you’re writing, keep this in mind!

it gets worse when we’re anxious or stressed, and when we’re excited! I get really really stuttery when I’m enthusiastic about the topic of conversation, because I know so much about that thing that I try to talk really fast and my mouth can’t keep up! it’s the same when I’m anxious or stressed - when there’s more on our minds, the more everything gets a little muddled.

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