Why Do I Still Have This Thing

“At least you love me.” I say to my pet as I hold them against my chest as they try to get away

this ending in a recipe literally changed my fucking life i thought i was being spread some fucking truisms abt the ugliness of marriage but it was literally a preamble to creme brulee brownies. writing is fake

@geekycubby

its sooooo ugly how confident so many dudes are in producing the most average music and art … … . .…… ..  where is their shame …   why did i get taught so much more shame than is useful to me 

Keep Punching Nazis

Thar stingray that killed Steve Irwin is probably dead now and got a hug from Steve himself in animal heaven because Steve’s a good guy like that

Are you saying Steve Irwin is in animal heaven and not human heaven

That would be his own idea of heaven I think.

i had no fucking clue until yesterday that jeb bush’s name isn’t fucking jeb those are his initials. john ellis bush. yes just like fucking GOB/george oscar bluth on arrested development good fucking god

‘Jeb Bush’ is equivalent to ‘ATM machine’

What wrong wif him

Nothing, he’s perfect