K. Blackwell

Desolate Oath: A Long Form Baldurs Gate 3 Fan Fiction.

Psychological Horror | Political Epic | Dark Humor

The Dark Urge was built to be a paladin of conquest. He cannot change his nature, so he seeks to bend the world around him. His companions will determine whether he earns a home, a throne, or a grave.

He's doing his best. His best is the problem.

Astarion Romance: but make it uncomfortable in a way that never resolves.

Giving women personalities.

A giant evil golden retriever whose favorite past time is restructuring governments for his favorite people.

A paladin who rolled Wisdom 20 and Empathy 3.

Desolate Oath is the kind of story that asks: "What if a serial killer got really into city ordinances?"

Publishing Schedule: Monday, 7PM EST. (This is a living work.)

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/68420666

P.S. Desolate Oath is substantially darker than this blog. The humor helps me regulate the horror.

Please read the tags carefully.

Chapter 40 is live.

End of Act 2.

Giving Astarion a pet warlord. Giving Vash an emotional support vampire.

Writing Chapter 39 affected me in unexpected ways.

To lay it out plainly, Desolate Oath is bleak. There is humor, sure, but it is psychological horror first. Some scenes have made me emotional, but there was something about Chapter 39 that cut me to the core.

It made me dream about being on death row. I wasn't afraid, but I felt a dreadful anticipation. My mind drifted from what it might feel like to die, to the simple acknowledgment that my death was inevitable either way.

There is something different about standing on the cliff edge waiting for someone to push you and not being able to stop it.

I've lived in a constant state of existential dread since I was very young. It's a part of my personality at this point. It colors every decision I make.

Is this something I'm proud of? Will this make a good story later? Is this worth the time it will take to accomplish?

Time is currency, and life is a flea market. There are no returns once you purchase a moment.

…Writing Chapter 39 forced me to spell out what happened to Danis's family. The scene involves a tower dropping as people run for safety.

As an older gentleman, it made me realize that I never got to properly process the events of 9/11. It's been decades, but it's lingered.

I lost someone very close to me four months before it happened. It didn't leave much room for me to grieve with everyone else, even though it impacted me all the same. It was too much for twelve year old me to process at the time.

The planes hit. The bodies fell. I saw it all - along with the rest of the world.

The worst part was that the world kept turning.

I stopped vaping back in 2017, but started again a week ago. Apparently vape culture has shifted beneath my feet since the good old days.

The kids at work all vape discreet pens with flavors like Strawberry Mango Berry Blast. Meanwhile I'm over here with a giant tank mod thinking:

Little bitches with their bitch fruit vape pens.

*rips a fat cloud of unicorn birthday cake surprise*

-

One of them told me with a straight face that he'd never seen a tank mod before. He tried it. He's buying one now.

Fantasy prose, sometimes:

"The obsidian haired warrior's cerulean orbs shimmered with ineffable melancholy beneath the argent moonlight."

My Brother in Bhaal. He's sad outside.

Act 2 finale is coming up. Chapter 40 goes live June 1st.

After that, I’ll be taking a month to go back and refine what I’ve written so far, just like I did after Act 1. Then onto publishing Act 3.

I need you guys to understand how much I adore Danis.

This story is really about him, deep down.

Outside of the political maneuvering, violence, and manipulation... there is Danis.

Standing up to a Bhaalspawn and remaining absolutely unmovable.

No Beta - we die like our egos after having a shit smear of a chapter publicly representing our fan fic for 10 months consecutively. :)

Update: I am nuking Chapters 1 and 2 entirely and will no longer include tutorial level events in Desolate Oath.

We know what happens. Yada yada nautiloid. Yada yada beach. Yada yada carnival of suffering.

I like the events of Chapters 1 and 2, so I will add them as Bonus Content on the website, so they can exist somewhere for anyone interested, but Desolate Oath doesn't really begin properly until the end of Chapter 3, so that will be the new chapter 1 for the official story.

Will work on all this during the hiatus.

Update update: BUT IF I DO THAT, THE COUP WILL NOT BE EARNED. THE COUP MUST BE EARNED.

Chapter 6