No Longer a Tomboy, Not Yet a Tomman

Sex doesn't make you an adult. It's not a rite of passage and it doesn't change you fundamentally.

Sex isn't needed to prove that you love or appreciate someone.

Sex isn't something inevitable. No one has the right to demand sex from you, not your date, not your hookup when you've changed your mind, not your spouse of thirty years, no one.

Everyone has a sex drive of their own kind. It can be active. It can be very low. It can be a flatline. Whatever it is, it deserves to be respected and accepted.

🌻 Bisexual women don't have half of a sexuality

🌻 Bisexual women don't have half of an identity

🌻 Bisexual women don't get half discriminated against

💜 Kissing her; good morning, on her cheek when you leave for work, on her knuckles when you're holding hands, on her neck and down her spine when you're lazing in bed together, on her lips for long long minutes with your arms around her and her hands in your hair...

💜 Holding hands

💜 Sleeping next to each other

💜 Telling secrets and sharing things you've never trusted anyone else with

💜 Crying in front of her. Seeing her cry. Comforting each other.

💜 Planning your future together. Making commitments and expressing the desire to be committed.

💜 Bathing together. Letting her wash your hair and your back, doing the same for her.

💜 Caressing each other. Your hand on her neck, her chest, her belly, her knee, her thighs.

💜 Holding her by her waist and leaning against her back.

💜 Playing with her hair

💜 Wearing each other's clothes; her borrowing you her jacket when it's cold, seeing her wear nothing but your t-shirt.

it was awkward because with “girlfriend” a lot of people would just assume i meant “friend,” and of course “fiancée” is gender-neutral when spoken,

so we’d always had plausible deniability.

but the meaning of “wife” is pretty unavoidable.

still, i made myself do it on principle, and slowly but surely it became natural.

now i love saying “my wife,” to everyone all the time.

i love saying it to the old woman distributing the strawberries at the farm share,

asking if she knows where i can still get rhubarb because every summer i make my wife a pie.

i love saying it to the gay employee helping me at crate and barrel,

telling him i’m buying these glasses because my wife and i both had them growing up, and seeing his eyes light up.

i love saying it to friends of friends and to new acquaintances and to potential coworkers and to the women at the laundromat.

i love being aggressively out, and i love having such an easy way to be aggressively out.

i love being the first woman with a wife someone has ever met, making our existence part of their reality.

i love being visible for other lgbt people who might feel a little less alone knowing i’m there, which helps me push past the fear when it comes.

febfem stimboard for anon

violet febfem witch stimboard for anon

I found the double moons febfem symbol on pinterest, unfortunately I don’t know who designed it but it seemed witchy to me