DSL used properly.

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The Punany Poets have a conversation in regards to ass play. They speak about their own personal experience.

Also how some black women and black men are hesitant to admit they enjoy it.

@reggaeboy876 I agree to a certain extent. I’m a baby of the 80s so I grew up in the 90s and I remember back in the day asking a woman if she gave head was equivalent two asking her if she engages in anal. Now in retrospect things have changed to the point where women openly admit to doing it.

Now I know things have changed in regards to men opening up more but you have guys like Drake and others admitting that they do enjoy for a woman to do that to them.

I just don’t know that can ever be considered the norm when many men especially black feels that act has a certain stigma to it.

It’s not just limited to sex because @earthshaker1217 mention this in another conversation that men specially black men are raised in a certain way that is different. I remember going to a panel where is is a group of black men talking to each other and the conversation was basically about how we we were raised as children and are currently raising our own children right now.

That one of the panel speakers said that he was raised in a certain type of way because his father sells that as a black man he couldn’t walk in the world “soft” because of the obstacles he would later have to face as a man. So his father used to tell him that crying is a weakness or stop acting like a girl etc etc. He spoke about how he had to break that cycle so you went past those trace onto his own son.

My father was raised like that but he broke the cycle with me therefore I’m passing on what he taught me towards my son.

I know I kind of got off subject but basically what I’m saying is that we usually associate certain type of stigmas when we don’t have to.

What it means to be a man in our community is so fragile that we cling to things that have nothing to do with the other in order to be considered men.

Not to mention our women do not help in this stigma, because like Killa said before our women are quick to judge and ostracize a man if they do not accept his sexual history or past in regards to what they deem masculine and manly.

I just got a comment from a woman who didn’t want to be identified but wanted me to mention that there are women out there who want to engage in this type of play as well but they feel if they admit to this they will be looked at as “nasty” or “hoish”

You’re correct we have to start this dialogue because as @earthshaker1217 said just because I don’t get down like that doesn’t mean it’s wrong for others. 

I’m noticing on the video you have men at that table but they’re remaining silent. 

Just from what I’ve witnessed.

I had a man I had casual sex with who I felt was genuinely holding back. I remember the first time we did it the condom slipped off and he didn’t openly say it but he was so embarrassed. I could sense it. I remember he would always ask me questions not focused on if I enjoyed the sex we were having it felt more like a performance review. Sometimes he would cum fast and try to keep fucking because he didn’t want to admit he nutted fast asl. IM NOT SAYING THAT TO DEMEAN HIM AT ALL. ITS NATURAL. But what bothered me the most was that he felt embarrassed about it. You could sense his shame.

I realized he was afraid I would expose him for whack dick when the condom slipped off and he was like “u gone tell all your friends huh”. It made me sad that he felt he had to put up a front instead of enjoy himself and that he did not trust my discretion. A lot of times he wouldn’t look at me or grab my body during because I could tell he was trying last longer. At the same time I love sucking dick and swallowing and wouldn’t give him head cause I was afraid he would think I was too easy even though I genuinely wanted to.

For example some guys are so embarrassed as you said cum too fast or have a difficult time maintaining an erection. Like I get questions on that all the time and I have to tell people it’s normal. One example is I was with my son’s mother for so long that once I started having sex with someone else I was no longer used to putting on a condom so sometimes I would lose an erection and at first I thought that was something wrong with me but then as I did more research I found out this is something that’s very common. I basically just had to get in the swing of things again.