What Is this?

You know when it comes down to it, you can have friends, close friends, best friends, and even friends you can consider family….but when you have limited amount of friends that are close, what happens then? What happens when that friend you call close, or consider family doesn’t really feel right to talk to? You know that deep down you can’t really tell them exactly everything. What happens when you have nobody you can truly tell EVERYTHING to and just when you get down and out about something you realize they can go to whomever they please…..but yet you sit there by yourself wallowing in sadness and anger trying to think of someone to talk to to calm you down but alas…..there’s nobody. When you yourself can’t go to your family friend(s) best friend(s), close friend(s), nothing. My question is….who do I go to when nobody is truly there for me. When in reality every fucking person I’ve called a friend has second guessed all of my decisions, called me stupid for making them, no matter the outcome, positive or negative. Nothing but judging and condescending opinions the entire way. When I tell them something it never truly stays between us, and when he gets down I help comfort them, but when I’m down “get over it” “it’s not the end of the world” “you’re overreacting”, and yet these are the exact same things I’ve wanted to say to them when they’re overreacting….and yet I don’t, I comfort them as much as I know how. It is to this point I’m done, I’m fed up and I will no longer be associated with anyone anymore. I’m done being the one to comfort people in their time of need and yet when it’s my turn I need to be a big boy and get over it. I’ll sit to myself and do me, the way it should’ve stayed.