i’m okay I guees

Sokka is still stewing in his personal humiliation, hours later. he’s half a bottle of bad barefoot wine in, and Suki is there egging him on. “do it, do it, do it, how else are you ever going to find loverboy again?”

“I don’t know, maybe by going to the grocery story again?” he whines

“yeah, but what kind of guarantee is that? maybe he normally goes to trader joe’s!”

and Sokka grabs a pillow from the couch and screams directly into it. but he can’t help but think she’s right. they had a connection. so he pulls his laptop off the coffee table, and goes to craigslist

and goes to missed connections

i rammed my cart into you at the south street whole foods, he writes in the title. can we go on a date?

Suki goads him into it, so it’s only fair that she has to proofread it for him.

you were wearing a hideous a hideous pinstripe shirt. i was in the cheese section, making a sharp turn for the olive bar, and i didn’t even see you. i crashed my cart directly into your side, and your hand basket tumbled ass over teakettle, just like you did. i helped you pick up your cornichons and tortilla chips. our eyes met. yours were beautiful. i’d love to take you out for coffee. same time next week?

and Suki posts it on his behalf, not giving him the time to wail about it all over again. “I get it, Sokka. he was super cute and has good taste in pickles. who knows, maybe he’ll be looking too.”

meanwhile Zuko is back in his own apartment, sipping on a gin and tonic. not that Sokka would have ever known this, but Zuko curates a dorky missed connections tumblr blog. he just likes reading about strange people’s strange exploits, you know?

it’s mostly combing through long lists of spammy bot pick up ads, but every now and again you find a real gem in all the shit. it’s mostly gross and hilarious, but sometimes strangely sweet. it’s about the exhilarating voyeurism of viewing someone else’s life. Zuko vibes with that.

and when he sees this one–in his city nonetheless–he almost chokes to death on his drink. when he’s done coughing, he looks again. because this feels pretty familiar.

maybe it’s the gin and tonic? Zuko has a pretty heavy pour. but no, this is too specific.

it’s definitely him. this guy had barreled into him with a cart. he was cute, with his hair pulled up and in a muscle tank. he looked like a frat bro, but he was really apologetic and he had picked up Zuko’s spilled cornichons

he wants to reply

Zuko opens up the email reply option.

Hi, he writes. I believe you bowled me over in front of the olive bar today. Your cart was full of Annie’s mac and cheese and what looked like four cartons of blueberries. (Are you making smoothies or something?) 

You were wearing a tank top and had a tattoo on your right bicep. I’ll be at Whole Foods next Saturday; I usually go around 10 AM. We can get coffee after we get our groceries. Try not to get anything frozen, I’d hate for it to melt.

he sends it. and immediately regrets it. and then doesn’t. he needs another g&t. but either way–if the cute guy from the grocery store shows up, he has a date

what do you mean wolfstar didnt raise harry

this is what my left shoe looks like. This is just used for walking and back up rolling since I’m dominant with my right foot.

THIS fucker is my leading shoe and the one I use to brake. this hunk a junk has like 45 degrees of Pure Heelie Brake Burn. it goes into the shoe itself at this point.

I am hardened every day through my battles of sick slides and rides. I am a war criminal of rolling shoes. I have been the reason some local places put back their “WE BAN HEELIES” signs. I wish these things could support my life style.