Sometimes You're a Big Weirdo

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Mary is dragging me to a play tonight #boredd #killme

been waitin’ for his coffee for four score and seven years

He’s sitting at a table cuz a booth would kill him

#this is a win-win situation#on one hand i can get money#on the other hand there is a tiny dog surrounded by money on my blog

HOW

I WANT TO KNOW YOUR SECRET

SERIOUSLY THOUGH WHAT ARE YOU

I GOT THIS AND I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

I want a doot doot

THIS SPECIAL IS SO IMPORTANT.

I’m afraid that I won’t survive this blackout Friday because there are so many beautiful ladies on my dash now I just keep refreshing and swooning. 

do you ever just genuinely love a historical figure so much that you want to wrap them in blankets and brush their hair and sing them lullabies and protect them from all that is bad in the world but you can’t because they’ve been dead for 70 maybe 200 years

What the hell

This post is what reduced me to tears.

This made me cry

Derek Venturi + looking at Casey MacDonald

i love when you’re playing cards against humanity and someone plays the “Bees?” card and everyone goes “bees?”