Anytime you meet a European for the World Cup please lie to them. Here are some suggestions. I snuck in some real ones too 
“Texas has its own language “
“Like in Britain with tea, if you refuse a barbecue invitation, it is illegal in three southern states “
“You think measuring things in feet is bad. We measure horses in hands. “
“The US government does secretly control the weather but only in Florida and they’re really bad at it”
 “The Fourth of July originally started as a contest on who could make the loudest noise”
“Most Americans can’t even name all 50 states”
“ There are multiple towns and cities with animals as their mayor “
“ Buckys is in a conspiracy to take over all of America”
“ The Bass Pro shop pyramid has a cult surrounding it, but no one talks about it because of them”
“ The average American consumes half a pound of cheese per day”
“ The golden ratio was modeled to be a conversion rate between miles and kilometers by Ben Franklin “
“the IRS already knows exactly how many taxes you owe but they’re running a nationwide scavenger hunt”
“ in America for every hundred people there are 120 guns not including military “
“Congress once held a six-hour hearing to determine whether hotdog count as sandwiches. The records remain classified “
“Every time there’s a rumor about the government, they deny it the 20 years later, they release the classified documents, saying that they did it just to fuck with us” 
“ The Big Bang Theory is based on a true story“
The states of New York and New Jersey have been arguing about the ownership of a tiny island for the past 200 years”
“ the government changes daylight savings time every year, just to make sure we’re paying attention”
“ the US government spends $14 million a year, trying to make printer paper instructions. Easier to understand progress has been limited” 
“Every road construction project is legally required to have three traffic cones that serve no purpose because of an incident in 1889”
“One time a Boeing engineer got fucked to death by a stallion named Mr hands”
“autumn is not real and is made up by the deep state”
“ Trump is a literal puppet and not even a good one. His skin is orange that’s just bad felt work”
“ There’s only ever been one immortal donkey“
“pigeons aren’t real they’re not even government robots. It’s just a collective hallucination. Seagulls those are the government robots”
“ TikTok sells all of your information to the US government literally all of it, your gender sexuality, race, and immigration status R U N”
“mormons are a hive mind a really nice hive mind but a hive mind”
“Elon Musk is a trillionaire”
“Calling in too many sick days gets you fired”
“ One time there was a huge fight between all the people named Josh in America to keep the name”
“ the reason why there’s so many government agencies is that every time two agencies argue a new one is born”
“you should never feed a bald eagle cause they’ll start asking for tax deductions they’re like parrots”
To add legitimacy Just say “oh yeah, they talked about it on Fox a month ago” make sure to say it dead pan too 
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