Nobody knows this account even exists so I can dump this here without freaking anyone out but I'm just at an endpoint I think. The only reason I ain't killing myself is because I don't want to make my mom cry. I don't want to live, I don't. I wholeheartedly want to die, nothing brings me joy anymore. I'm not happy, I feel like I have no control over the way things are spiraling into hell all around me. Honestly, I don't. I hate the government and the government hates us, this country doesn't have your back if you're not abhorrently rich. With the way things are heading I'm gonna be dead in a few years anway bc I can barely afford groceries and you think I'm gonna be able to afford health insurance? Insulin?? I work at a gas station for fucks sake, and I can't wory anywhere else because I CAN'T AFFORD A CAR. There's no way out of this cycle, there's nothing I can do. I really wanted to live a long life, I did, but I truly don't think I'm gonna get to anymore. I don't want to lose life, I just don't wanna live this one.
