We're boned

                                                 From the Earth...

                            You’re always running from death, 

                            even if you have nothing to live for… 

[[Howdy my followers, as you know i’ve been off foolishmxrtals lately. But it is not abandoned! I want to keep a way where I can keep in touch with everyone, socialize with them, and just overall make a good hangout spot. So I made the Skarj shack! Come and join!]]

Seeing the gun placed on his forehead, Bender's eyes gave a glare. Bender tapped his little cabinet chest, and out popped open little robotic arms holding a blowtorch, a mini chainsaw, a glock, and worst of all, a boxing glove on a spring.

"I thought this was a delivery job, not an assassination attempt." Said Bender with a stern voice. He already died once, didn't like it, and the Robot Devil and Robot God himself didn't like him either. "Look here Jack-aroo. Do you want the damn delivery or not?"

Bender wasn't one to to take in threats with someone who probably has just as high as an ego as he does. This will probably already "fuck up" the delivery.

"I'm a bending unit, jackass, I bend girders for construction, that and jail bars, timelines at one point, and limbs." Of course, it wasn't his only function, being forty percent of everything, at least says him, Bender is a multi-purpose tool in reality.

   “Then they’re nothing but garbage! Buckets of bolts!”

   She placed her hands on her hips as she listened to the robot drone on about it. She had numbers of robots she had to spare. 

   Her posture slumped and she pinched her temple. “Look. I just want to see havoc on the planet before destroying it. So I guess I can lend some bots.. and you can enjoy your last days of life as you do me a favor and destroy these pitiful nerds.”

"Pitiful nerds? If anyone's good at bullying nerds in high school, it's me!" And it's never his high school, he just breaks into school property for the sake of a wedgie.

"So a hillbilly and Skeletor, ey? Hillbilly should be easy, can't say much about Skeletor, he might have Beastman on me if he's lucky.

And there's enough havoc on Earth already, lady. I mean, if it has intelligent life, then it's bound to have unintelligent life messing it up. You have any idea how many galactic wars it's been in?"

Personally, he's rather skeptical on how this lady with gym socks managed to get a hold of producing an army in the first place. But if it means him getting an army, he'll do what she says. Following orders and pulling a machine gun out of his torso storage.

❝𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜 𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗’𝚝 𝚊𝚜 𝚍𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔. ❞

𝚂𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚞𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚘𝚋𝚗𝚘𝚡𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚖𝚎𝚗. 𝚂𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚠𝚘. 𝙾𝚗𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚠𝚑𝚒𝚌𝚑 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚌𝚊𝚝!

❝𝙽𝚘𝚠…𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝’𝚜 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚒𝚝.❞

𝙹𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚍 𝚎𝚡𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚊𝚜 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑. 𝙸𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚏𝚎𝚠 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚞𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚜𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚙 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚊𝚕. 𝙷𝚎 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚊𝚌𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚜 𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚎𝚟𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚌𝚒𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚏𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚊𝚛 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎. 

𝙷𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚑𝚒𝚛𝚎𝚜 𝚕𝚒𝚝 𝚞𝚙 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚎𝚡𝚌𝚒𝚝𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚕 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚑𝚎𝚛. 

"So what's the job, redhead? Poaching, murder covering, election rigging, car theft, bank heist, burglary, i'm all up for that type of stuff. Bending may be my primary function, but crime is also high up on my list."

If anyone was known for crime in New New York, it was Bender. He's gotten away with so many things, though perhaps his most famed breakthrough was theft and robbery through time travel.

“Uh, y-yes? I-I mean no, but-” Honestly, it made more sense to him    before the robot had attempted to explain it, and considering that    it made practically no sense to him to begin with… Well, needless    to say, he was pretty lost.

"Jeez, 'yer a real piece of work. Alright, the main fuel source nowadays is dark matter, which is heavy and expensive, thankfully, dark matter is what our pet craps out. So to save money and further kill the ozone layer, MomCo made a plentiful source, alcohol, as the main robotic fuel. Like I said, if we don't drink, we're the equivalent of a drunk human, so if we drink consistantly, productivity would actually be stable.

And another thing, other fuel sources are for hippies, fossil fuels went extinct a long time ago."

Some say the world will end in

                                                  𝒻𝒾𝓇𝑒,

                                 Some say in

                                             𝒾𝒸𝑒.

           From what I’ve         𝓉𝒶𝓈𝓉𝑒𝒹        of desire                      

                      I hold with those who            

                                                                     𝒻𝒶𝓋𝑜𝓇 𝒻𝒾𝓇𝑒.

But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of             ＨＡＴＥ                                     To say that for destruction

                        𝒾𝒸𝑒

                              Is also great                                                                                 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓌𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓈𝓊𝒻𝒻𝒾𝒸𝑒

Indie, Private, Selective Codsworth RP/Ask Blog One-liners,, Novella, Para