Raptor Jesus went extinct for our sins.

Tell me you didn't mistake a manchineel apple for an ackee

every day i set aside a period of time just to mourn the loss of jamie campbell bower as jace

Mammals both produce milk and have hair. Ergo, a coconut is a mammal.

I know you’re being facetious, but this is an actual issue with morphology-based phylogeny.

*leans over and whispers to person beside me* what are they talking about

*leans over and whispers back*  Human ability to quantify and categorize natural phenomena is sketchy at best and wildly misleading at worst

consider the coconut

this reminds me of that time Plato defined humans as “featherless bipeds” and Diogenes ran in with a plucked chicken screaming “BEHOLD A MAN!”

i love how you say “it reminds me of that time” like you were there.

listen if an immortal feels brave and supported enough to come out we should respect them

This post is a journey

1 Reblog = 1 Respect

I maintain that humans started attempting classify animals, and some god or another made the platypus, and is still laughing.

Athena: You mean venomous, and make sure the eggs have both reptile and bird traits. Hermes: *takes the joint* Give it extra senses. Poseidon: It should be aquatic.

I MEAN where’s the lie

Demeter: … And where exactly do you expect me to put this? Everyone: Australia.

World Heritage Post

A coconut and a platypus are now related. Because tumblr is science. Behold the word of tumblr.

I know I sound like your mom but you kids need to stop fucking vaping

Also STOP VAPING INDOORS AROUND OTHER PEOPLE. Holy shit, if you're gonna wreck your lungs at least give me the option not to wreck mine.

yeah okay ill reblog that

Please I’m begging yall as an asthmatic, your fruit-flavored vapor will still give people around you who are smoke-sensitive attacks. So will weed. Don’t do it inside; if you’re at a bus stop or something try to not stand right next to people or move downwind of them if you can.