Your Friendly Neighborhood Ace Pilot

Expressing deep fondness for those long-gone halcyon days, the U.S. population collectively yearned Tuesday for the relative calm of the “president is a giant pedophile” news cycle. “It was a simpler time then, back when all people wanted to talk about was the leader of the country molesting underage girls,” said Denver resident Scott Munoz, one of millions of Americans who noted the comparative peacefulness of the public discourse that surrounded Donald Trump possibly using his friendship with the late sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein to prey on helpless minors and contrasted it with the current tumult marked by the president undermining global alliances in pursuit of Greenland, unlawfully capturing Venezuelan President Nicolás Maduro, and encouraging the violence of ICE agents. 

- additional cargo they were picking up in texas city was LOOSE BAGS OF AMMONIUM NITRATE that the dock workers described as being ANOMALOUSLY WARM UPON BEING LOADED INTO THE SHIP ??????

- small fire breaks out in cargo hold, instead of putting it out with water that could damage the cargo the captain decides to close all the hatches to try to make the cargo hold airtight and smother the fire (stupid but you can kind of understand how they got there)

- the heat of the trapped smoke in the cargo hold instead causes the aforementioned LOOSE BAGS OF AMMONIUM NITRATE to undergo a chemical reaction and turn into nitrous oxide, massively increasing the pressure inside of the airtight hold

- one of the hatch covers fails

- mfw all the pressure in the cargo hold is released at once causing an explosion that fucking levels everything in the port within 2000 feet

- mfw the shockwave shatters windows up to a hundred miles away

- mfw on-fire twine and peanuts and fucking grenades are raining down over texas city

- mfw some of the pieces of the ship got launched into the sky faster than the speed of sound

- mfw they found the ship’s anchor inside of a ten foot wide crater over a mile and a half away

- mfw this was one of the largest and most devastating non-nuclear explosions in world history

someone running rescue and recovery after the FIRST boat exploded noticed that the second boat's cargo was on fire and reported it....and this just went. ignored. for several hours. until someone was like "oh shit better get this under control" and tried to move the boat to no avail and they just gave up and evacuated