;; sun/love

          jax was someone who she’d known peripherally for a while now. and while she’d spoken to him a little bit, he had never seemed like the joking type, but his deadpan statement made her snort, a bit of her anxiety lifting. “ ah, right, of course. foolish of me. ” she murmured, settling back in her seat. the little ember of all the confidence she used to have seemed to be spurring, coming back. just enough to push her through this decision. “ money isn’t a problem. i can get money. ” as much as she would hate it, asking her parents for money, they likely wouldn’t press to much as to why she needed it. deflating a little bit, lou bit her lip. she hadn’t really thought about this. valentina had given her the business card because lou couldn’t figure out what to do. did she want him to die? was that even something jax did? just away. she wanted him away from her. it wasn’t fair that she lived in constant fear of him showing up. “ uh... i... yes? maybe? i’m open to options. i mean, like, not dead? but uhm... i’d like my apartment keys back. i think that’s the only thing i had in mind. that’s not a plan, sorry. ” 

          not all smiles are happy ones, sometimes smiles are threats. being shouted at by some high school primadonna was low on her list of acceptable situations. standing her ground, lou smiled. “ cherry, shut the fuck up for ten seconds and use that brain. what would i gain from making another person in this school hate me? i already live with three of the worst human beings to cross the threshold of this place. will you just listen? ” holding the bridge of her nose tightly, lou spat out, “ who even got you thinking this? ” 

          the apartment was empty, and that scared her. every creak was him coming back, and somehow silence was worse. so, lou left a tv show or radio or podcasts running almost constantly. there had been a couple noise complaints but her landlord was sympathetic to her situation. however her neighbor to the side seemed to take particular issue, and had been yelling. so on her day off, lou decided that the right move would be to bring over apology pie. pie was the best dessert she could make other than scooping ice cream at work. it felt good to be focused on something, using her hands and whatever pseudo skill she had with this. her sisters had always liked her pies, and they were judgmental shits. she was so keyed in on what she was doing that rough knocks on the door sent her heart leaping. wiping her hands on a towel, lou carefully made her way to the door, looking out through the peep hole. confusion first, then a moment of connection and she swung the door open. “ you’re my neighbor, right? hi, i’m lou & i am so freaking sorry i’m so annoying. ” 

          lou tugged at the frayed cuff of her sweatshirt sleeve, anxiety sitting on her chest heavily. dried blood matted down some of her baby hairs from a cut on her hairline. there was a fresh bruise blooming on her jaw. in her other hand she slowly turned the small business card that had led her to this almost stereotypical p.i. office. had he pulled this from a b list movie or something? lou made it a point to tell herself not to say that out loud. “ so... valentina said you fixed stuff. people stuff? ” her chest felt nervous and tight, partly adrenaline, partly how shady this felt. she was not the shady type. lou also knew jax a bit from the diner, and definitely knew that she needed to spit out what she wanted sooner than later. tears started to spring up - no good - and as she dabbed at her eyes, lou huffed. “ vincent won’t leave me alone, i tried to handle this, i can’t handle this. i need help, please. ” 

          staring at leo, lou can’t help but feel a small mounting of frustration. not at him, he was what he was and that was okay. more so at herself for being in this situation. “ honestly? maybe a little. but i kinda know you. i think you’ll last here long enough to help me not end up homeless. ” sighing, she hid her face with her hand. “ leo honestly, i just need help. however long you want to stick around. i can barely afford this place after - ” another sigh, this one a little more frustrated, more to level her emotions. he would get wigged out if she started crying. “ i don’t care what happens, but if you’re able to pay some rent, it would be a huge favor to me. ”