Elain and Lucien knew they were mates from the moment they locked eyes.
They both felt the link between them when he reached out through the bond.
It's confirmed their bond is able to be scented.
Based on everything we've been given that means Elain and Lucien are bound on a biological, molecular level, something that cannot be undone.
I'm not saying Elain has to accept Lucien for this reason but it does not make logical sense for her to forever ignore Lucien because he is (in canon) an actual part of her on a molecular level. Two souls sharing one thread.
The only way for Elain to have growth, the only way for her to know herself as she now is, is to embrace Lucien. Not embrace him as her lover but embrace him as someone who will always exist inside of her because he ALWAYS will, jut like Rhys told Feyre in ACOWAR.
She doesn't owe Lucien her time or attention but she owes it to herself to discover why fate, the Mother, decided that she would always be connected to him because it's not something that can be undone even without a romance. From the moment of their bond snapping the Elain of the future was never going to exist without that link to him.
Does that seem unfair to some? Maybe but since when is anything fair to these characters? Was it fair that Elain's fiancé rejected her? Was it fair the King of Hybern killed her father? Was it fair that Feyre was kidnapped by Tamlin or manipulated into a bargain with Rhys or Nesta was forced into training with Cassian when she didn't want to be or that Lucien had his lover slaughtered in front of him?
Fantasy books aren't about what's fair but about a character learning to embrace the path fate has set them on.
Knowing that fate has set into motion something that Elain can not escape (any anti's trying to magic away her bond so she can be free and clear of Lucien are making Elain's journey a cop-out, it's too neat and tidy to say "no worries! You don't need to deal with your bond because I'll conveniently magic it away for you!) it's logical to assume that Elain will have to eventually face that which she's hiding from. She will have to truly confront Lucien and their bond because it's the only way for her to finally come to terms with who she is now and that fact should scare anti's because there's not much that Elain could dislike about Lucien. He loves nature as she does, they share a similar sense of humor, they try to avoid violence, prefer to forgive rather than seek revenge, apologize for their mistakes, are both wise, both enjoy making friends and being social. These are clear reasons the mother felt they were equal to one another, why they were made mates. The author may have given Elain a little fling on the side after her broken engagement but do you know what she was also doing while laying those "cute" little E/riel moments? Building up the narrative that it is Elain and Lucien who are most similar, who share the most in common, that Lucien is the son of the HL of Day and Elain wants sunshine, reminding us time and again that mates are special.
Sure, Sarah could go a different route and give us a rejected bond even after Elain is ready to face the person who now shares a link to her on a biological molecular level but when the author has done nothing but remind us how well suited Elain and Lucien actually are I'm not getting the vibe that's what will happen in their story. Facing her bond with Lucien means finally facing all that she is, something that she's clearly been hiding from when you consider Rhys's words in the Feyre bonus, that maybe she's acting a certain way for fear of disappointing others (and consider that her mate while also kind and good, is also capable of getting his hands dirty when necessary).
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