A Vessel For Him

I used to think praying was really boring….borderline a waste of time. Growing up, I didn’t fully understand the depth of prayer because all I could think of was how long they were or how many times repeated a certain phrase and things like that. But I’m grateful that my personal relationship with God has completely changed my view on prayer! Now I see it as one of the ways I can communicate with and grow closer to God.

I see prayer as one of the basics of a relationship with God. There’s no way to grow if you do not pray and I’m glad that this is something I understand now. I think a lot of us know prayer is so important, but I’m sure that some of us who were never really taught how to pray. Well, isn’t it great that we serve a God that doesn’t leave us hanging?!

In Matthew 6, Jesus gives us some things to keep in mind when we go into a time of prayer:

Our prayers are to and for God (vv.5-6).

God doesn’t need to be impressed. I used to think that I need to say all these fancy words and pray in certain public settings because it would make people think I’m spiritually mature or really in touch with God. What I didn’t realize is that it’s pretty much the opposite. I don’t need to put on a show or prove to people that I can pray. I don’t pray to entertain them.

Our prayers can be simple (vv.7-8).

It can be so easy to fall into the desire of wanting to pray like someone you know or someone you’ve heard then try to imitate their style. This can often lead to empty prayers or us using words we don’t fully understand. We don’t need to use a thesaurus when we go to pray. It’s not about using words beyond our vocabularies, it’s about the position of our heart’s when we pray. It’s okay for our prayers to be simple as long as our intentions are pure.

Our prayers can clear our hearts (vv.14-15)

It’s important for us to be honest in our prayers. One of things that is asked of us is that we forgive those who have hurt us. We do this so that God will forgive us of our own wrongdoings. If you think about it, it really does not make sense for us to hold grudges against people, because we also make mistakes, all the time. And if God would pile up our sins, instead of forgiving us and clearing our debts, we wouldn’t be where we are today. Forgiveness helps us clear our hearts of any unnecessary weight. It’s not always easy. It’s okay to ask God to let God know you’re struggling to forgive someone and ask for Him to help you through that process. Again, it’s about the sincerity of what you’re asking.

As we grow in our relationship with God, we’ll find more ways to grow our prayer life. It’s important that we’re consistent in our prayers because it’s one way for God’s glory to be revealed to us.

Hope this post was helpful! Have questions? Need prayer? I’m here to help!

Much love always,

I love that feeling when you realize that God was setting you up for a revelation. Putting all the pieces together that led you up to where you can say, “Wow God, you did that”? Not many things surpass such a moment. This week as I was listening to some worship songs, God personally was revealing to me that I am His child and there is freedom in being His.

You know how when you want to try a new restaurant and you look up reviews? They may give you facts that can shape your view of the restaurant, but ultimately it’s not until you go yourself that you really know if you like it or not? I feel like there’s so many truths I’ve heard, such as this one, but this week God made it real for me, personally.

There are people out there who think that Christianity is so restricting. They just make it seem like it’s about following a bunch of rules in order to please God. Honestly, there’s so much freedom available to us, once we decide that we’re going to follow Jesus Christ for the rest of our lives. The Bible teaches us we longer have to worry, that we’re made beautifully, that God has already planned great things for us, etc. and all we really need to do is surrender our lives to Him. If you think about life without God, it’s full of being enslaved to the world and its worries, its insecurities, and its struggles, but with God, he assures you that he’s gotten everything taken care of. And when you actually understand that He means what He says, you’ll experience His freedom.

I truly believe it’s time for us to walk in the freedom that God has given us. It’s funny because even Christians don’t always act as though they’re truly free. I remember a book I read some years back said that sometimes people that were enslaved don’t act like they’re free because they just got used to living their lives in slavery. God doesn’t want that for us. We are no longer slaves, by the amazing grace of God, we have been freed. It has already happened, it’s time for us to tap into it so we can really begin experiencing the fullness of being a child of God.

“I speak eternal truth,” Jesus said. “When you sin you are not free. You’ve become a slave in bondage to your sin. And slaves have no permanent standing in a family, like a son does, for a son is a part of the family forever. So if the Son sets you free from sin, then become a true son and be unquestionably free! John 8:34-36,TPT

Much love always,

Freedom in being TRANSPARENT

“There’s freedom in being transparent.” I wish I would’ve known of this statement years ago, then I could’ve gotten rid of a perfect image that I portrayed to the world and to myself. If I really was open to being free, then I could be my true authentic self and really be able to help others. For so long I used many excuses to rationalize my inabilities to relate to others, chalking it up to just being shy. While granted that was the case, I didn’t want others to already have a preconceived notion of who I was, but I wasn’t even willing to open myself to allow people to see “who I really was.”

What I didn’t realize then was that when I’m not true to myself, then no one can get to really know me or understand me. I was the type of person who didn’t want my insecurities to be highlighted, not even the slightest. It was so sad, I wouldn't even allow anyone to see the “real me”, knowing those  were the parts that God would use to draw certain people into my path to help and return the favor. At that time I didn’t know God's plan for my life and I didn't know how he would use what I’ve gone through to be a blessing to others.

I don’t know about you, but I had so many excuses swirling in my head leading me to doubting myself. How crazy is it, that we allow the naysayers and negative thinking, even our own selves, push us out of destiny into what God wants. Often times we think that we aren’t capable of reaching goals, or helping others because of what we’ve been through or because of our background story. Trust me, I know because I’ve thought that of myself. I was even doubting myself in the midst of writing. Sometimes we are the only ones in the way of ourselves. It’s okay to not have it all together, and we aren’t supposed to. Even God knows that you don’t have it all together, because if you did then you wouldn't need to depend on him (Philippians 3:12).

When you find freedom in being transparent you quiet the voices of just yourself, and you open yourself up to others that you would've never known  that they needed to hear your testimony. When you're transparent you're able to share experiences with others and you see that you’re not alone. In my own journey, I’ve seen that being honest of past struggles helps not only yourself, but others in their process. You never know what people are going through, and someone could be waiting for you to open up, so they can finally have the courage to exhale and admit “me too.” Think about how freeing it is to let go of all expectations and just live in the truth God has for you.

I encourage you to not let your past dictate where you are going, and to not let the fear of being vulnerable silence you. Let your transparency bring you peace. When I was finally able to become transparent with not only family and friends but to myself and most importantly to God, that’s when I noticed the burdens were falling off. I wasn’t pretending to be someone or something that I wasn’t. I was able to release the burdens of insecurities and the idea of “perfection” to God, and he was able to carry those (Matthew 11:28-30). There’s absolute truth and freedom in you being transparent to yourself and to others. I just encourage you to be transparent at least with yourself, if no one else. Allow yourself to be made free in God and allow him to take on your burdens and transform you with a new mindset. No matter what you’ve gone through, what you’re currently going through now, or what you see ahead, God is always offering freedom to you.        

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God... (1 John 3:1, NIV)

God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. (Ephesians 1:5, NLT)

When someone says, “You’re _____’s daughter!” a few things go through my head. When I hear this I think, “I wonder how they knew” “Was it my ___?” “Wow! Am I that much like them?” It could either be a really proud moment or annoying moment depending on the time and day and how many times I’ve heard it that day, and I’m always wishing and hoping that they learn my name so they won’t call me “____’s daughter” for life. More recently, though, I’ve been so proud when someone says this to me because I appreciate my parents so much and know they’ve built, and still are building, a legacy behind their names. Being part of that, and witnessing it, is great in itself.

The quote that comes to mind in all this thinking is, “You don’t choose your family...” which is true, God places us in them. Imagine God choosing people to be part of his family, and he chose you. Wow, right? When I think about all I have done, how I have fallen short so many times, how I have dealt with lying, lust, addiction, unforgiveness, anger, and other things, I wonder what could possibly make God want me to be associated with him in such an intimate way. Like really...me? His daughter? The God who created all things, planned all things, can see all things, and is capable of all things, wants to be a Father to me? Why? Simple: because He believes I am worth it. That is how much he loves me. You know how you don’t choose your family? It’s true, but you do choose to love them and also accept that they love you. In the same way, it is my choice to love Christ and also accept the love he has for me. My family doesn’t love me just because we are related to me, my family has shown me through the years in more ways than one how much they love me. And Jesus showed me he loved me in the ultimate way by giving his life for me. The Father continually shows me how He loves me day in and day out. And of course, the first time it really kicked in, I accepted it and gave my life to Him. Now I am His child. A joint heir with Christ. Wow, right? It seems like such a heavy title and that’s because it is.

It’s not meant to be a light one. Even though it’s available to everyone, not everyone is ready to take it on. When you accept that you’re a child of God, He begins transforming you into what it really means to be His. Someone should be able to know by the way I live that I am a child of God. It means giving up any old ways, anything that makes someone look like a product of the world, and not everyone is ready for that. And what is amazing about God is that he knows that and still loves you anyway, and is ready to welcome you with open arms when you’re ready to surrender to Him. I can personally tell you that being a child of God is so amazing. It comes with its highs and lows, it’s loud moments and quiet ones. You will be frustrated, you will get angry, you will questions things and you may even want to give up, but overall it is so worth it and your life as His child is so much better than it could’ve been. For the past month or so, my spirit has just been reminded of how God loves me as his daughter. How he decided I was worth it. How he believed in me even before I was formed.

Guys, I really encourage you to accept that God loves you. Right in this moment. You’re wonderful as you are right now, but you could be even more amazing if you accept the love He has for you and accept to be part of His family. Don’t worry about the “heaviness” of the title. If God brought you to it, He will lead you to it. If you would like to be part of this heavenly family, please contact me via email or Twitter and I will be more than glad to talk to you about this. And if you are already part of the family, I encourage you to bring more people in, so they can also become our brothers and sisters in Christ.

God loves you and so do I!

Much love always,

Kumam 💝

Email: [email protected]

My father is literally the best! My dad loves me so much. He may not always explicitly said, “I love you,” but he definitely has showed it since birth. My dad doesn’t say no, unless he thinks what I’m asking for is not good for me. He even gives me things without me asking, even more than I would’ve asked for. He always keeps me in mind. These are just a few ways he shows me that he loves me.

One thing I really love about my dad is that he is a man of God. And because my dad is obedient to God’s Word, he made sure to raise us, his children, as Christians, something I will forever be grateful for! And the more I read my Bible on my own and began to understand what it means to be like Christ, (who is also God) I came to understand one way that my father expresses his desire to be like Christ is through fatherhood. The Bible describes God as “kind”. Kind is defined as being friendly, generous, and considerate. Without a doubt this is God. He affirms his approval of us many times and supports us, he gives us more than we could ever ask, and he always thinks about us, in fact he is always right there with us.

I’m not saying that my dad is God, but when I sit back and think I see how my father is walking in God’s ways. And it’s something I really admire about him. He didn’t have to do this, but because my dad has experienced God for himself and all that comes with having a relationship with God, He decided not only to be obedient to the Word of God by following in His footsteps, but also by making sure to teach his children about God as well. And because my dad put in effort into shaping his children in being followers of Christ, I have experienced the love of God and of course, it’s something I cannot stop talking about!

It’s not that others haven’t influenced my walk with God heavily, but my dad was one of the first Christians I encountered. And because he decided that he was going to listen to what God asked of him, I know God too. I can now go out and tell someone about God and the love that He has for them. I was listening to a sermon yesterday and he mentioned Romans 10:13-15, which says:

For “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them? And how will anyone go and tell them without being sent? That is why the Scriptures say, “How beautiful are the feet of messengers who bring good news!”

My dad was sent, he told us about God in a way that we now believe in Him, and have called on the Lord so we shall be saved. It takes one person. One person to genuinely love the Lord with everything in them enough to go out and tell another person and so on.

Proverbs 22:6 says,

“Train up a child in the way he should go,

And when he is old he will not depart from it.

I thank God that my father took this verse literally, because now I have a relationship with Jesus Christ and have the ability to tell about others of a love so amazing…

The theme of this month is “Good Good Father”. I pray that you’re blessed and encouraged by the testimonies that you will read, and that you’re able to reflect on who God is as your Father.

Thanks for keeping up! Enjoy your weekend !

Much love always,

She believed in me when I could not. 

Picked me up when I fell.

Scolded me when I was wrong,

Loved me through each mistake. Even the ones that took me forever and a day to learn.

Prayed for me without ceasing. 

Defended me with no hesitation.

A product of her own transgressions. 

A product of her obstacles. 

She attempts to live through me as her seed. Yet she still finds the strength to allow me to plant my own tree.

All fruits of the spirit heed from her.

 ...."She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.." Proverbs 31:26 

-She is.. My mother. 

Happy Friday! Thanks so much for tuning in to this semester’s Finals Affirmations series. I really appreciate the support and hope you’ve been able to keep up your spirits during this time!

Reflect on what God has done for you this exam season, even this semester. Isn’t God good? Same. We thank Him that you’ve made it through. You’re here, alive and well. Push through your last exam(s) today. It’s nothing in comparison to all you’ve been able to accomplish this semester. Remember God believes in you and so do I!

Join me in this prayer of thanksgiving:

O God,

You are Alpha and Omega, and everything in between. Wonderful are your works, Heavenly Father. There is none like You. No one could ever compare nor even come close to who You are. Thank you for your love that you so lavishly pour upon me. Thank you for your mercy and your grace. God I want to say thank you. There are not enough words to thank you for every single mountain and valley you’ve brought me through this semester. There were many storms, there was much sunshine, and through it all You’ve been faithful. I praise Your Holy name for you are so good to me. Thank you for being with me through this finals season. No matter the results, you will continue to be with me and help me along my path to success. God I pray as I enter into a time of rest that you just heal me of any illness, heal my body of any aches and pains, and clear my mind. Let me be able to rest in you this summer. Keep me safe wherever I go, as you have been doing. Abba Father, again, I just say thank you. Thank you for all you have done, all you’re doing, and all you will do. May I enjoy this break and be prepared for my next steps ahead.

In Your precious and holy name,

Amen ❤️

Good morning!! Two more days!!!

TWO MORE DAYSSSSS

Can we just praise God for a second?! Look how close we are to the finish line!!

I just want to talk about speaking life today. The Bible says that death and life are in the power of the tongue (Proverbs 18:21) , so think about this: How am I using my words to speak life? Think about the magnitude of words. They’re powerful. More than we really would  like to ever admit. A sentence can change our whole entire mood. Words can be used to curse. Words can be used to praise. Words can be used for prayer. How are you using your words this exam season?

Negative words can slip out our mouths so quick. It’s as if we’ve been programmed to speak ill of ourselves and our situations. We’re so quick to say we’re failures, or we’re terrible, we can’t do xyz and things such as....but is that really the truth? No. These are lies the enemy wants you to believe and if you say a lie enough times, you’ll actually start to believe it. But the Word, which is TRUTH, says you’re more than a conqueror (Romans 8:37), it says that God has plans for your to prosper (Jeremiah 29:11), that you can do ALL things through Christ who gives you strength (Philippians 4:13), and so much more. Whose words are these? GOD’S. And if God is not a man that he should lie (Numbers 23:19) .....what business do we have declaring lies over ourselves?

Our thinking changes today. Our mindsets shift now.

Say this with me please. Out loud, with your chest, thank youu:

I will continue to excel in these last few days because of Who I put my hope and trust in. Not only will I put in work and finish everything in good time, I will do it well. I believe that I can do everything I need to do in order to finish this semester because God will carry me through.  I give Him praise for all that he has helped me to do, because I know without his power and his grace, this would not have been possible. I know He is on my side. I believe all these things.

Use your words wisely today. Take captive those negative thoughts today by speaking life.

Much love always,

As we go into this finals week, I wanted to remind you of your way, why you're going in that direction, and where your peace is. More importantly, I wanted to encourage you to let you know that you can do this and that what seems to be impossible is possible with prayer. Seek God wholeheartedly and place your complete trust in Him when it comes to your academic success, future goals, and ambitions. He is the only One who knows the beginning and end for you and is just asking for your obedience. During trying times like finals/studying, we face fear of failure, immense pressure to complete final assignments, and a cloud of doubt that makes us even wonder: "is this even what I'm supposed to do?" "I'm not good enough," or " is this worth it?" I'm asking you recognize those thoughts, realize that it is the enemy coming to rob you from what you are destined to do, and do not let him win. Silence the words of the enemy and fight back with the grace of God. Cover your thoughts in the Word and connect with our Father daily to experience the purpose and peace He has for you. Why? Because your way lies in the presence of the Lord, He is the one who orders your steps, and will hold your hand to guide you through tough times. Here are some verses to help you get through this finals week and life in general: The LORD says, "I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.~Psalms 32:8

Show me your ways, LORD, teach me your paths.-Psalms 25:4

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps.~Proverbs 16:9 

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.~Jeremiah 29:11

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. ~ 1 John 4:16-18

Know your why, find your peace, find your way.

Click here to listen to this song! Skip to 0:21!

I loooooved Psalty the Singing Songbook when I was younger. When you have time, watch the Camping Adventure Movie 😀

Anyway, this song is from the verse seen in Psalm 55:22:

“Cast all your cares upon the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.”

What happens when you cast all your cares upon the Lord? He will sustain you. And it doesn’t just say one care, or some cares, it says all of them. It’s so important that we lay our burdens down at the feet of Jesus. In case you were unaware: we cannot do everything in our own strength. It’s actually not gonna work. Things will fail. If it was possible to do everything ourselves, we wouldn’t need God in our lives. But one of the great things is about God is that He is always ready to take our burdens and give us peace when we ask. The thing is: we need to actually ask him to take them from us. God is not man. He’s not the type to say, “Come to me whenever, I’m always free” and every time you try to to him, he’s busy. God is always there; he’s always listening, but in real life. At any time, you can go to him and talk to him. We need to separate his powerful character from our previous experiences with people and realize his Word is true. We can trust him. There’s so many worries that can come from this exam season. There’s so much that can go wrong. When the negative thoughts and fears start creeping in, literally stop and let God know what is bothering you, and then be like Elsa and let it go (:

God’s got you. I promise!

Much love always,

Kumam 💓

In case you couldn’t click the word: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9M7MmEnT_94

Good morning!

It’s another day of exams. I know, I know. It’s hard, but look at it this way: you’re so much closer to finishing this semester. For some of you this may be the end of your undergraduate career, for others this may just mean a well-deserved break is ahead. Wherever you may be, be proud of yourself. Think about how far you have come! You’re so much better than you were in the beginning of the semester.

You’ve been able to learn so much and it’s time to apply all that knowledge to your exam(s) today. You might be scared, you might be anxious, but know and believe that God’s got you. There’s a peace that comes when know you’ve done your part and leave the rest to the One who knows exactly what your future holds. If your exam is at 8 am, it’s okay. You know what you know and you’re going to do your best and whatever happens, happens. If it’s later, you have a small window to make sure you know what you know and do your best. Whatever happens, happens. This exam season will not be the end of you. It will not be the end of your dreams. This is only a small part of your success. You will still be able to do all that you here to do, because of Who you put your trust in. God is your strength. Where you are weak, He is strong. Where you lack, He is sufficient. He is your peace. He is your ever-present help.

You got this. I believe in you. God believes in you. Go do work.

Much love always,

Happy Sunday! Since we’re not taking finals today, I don’t have a normal post. I do want to encourage you, though, to go to church! There’s really nothing like godly community. Listen, fellowship, be engaged in the service. Don’t be afraid to open up and ask someone for prayer for this exam season! Remember God cares about even the smallest details of your life and there’s power in prayer! Even if you can’t get to church today, watch a service online. I really enjoy Elevation Church (Livestream @ 9:30 am), Transformation Church (Livestream @ 10 am),  Destiny Church (Message Archives) & All Nations Worship Assembly (YouTube).

After this, take a break then go study! You got this! Study hard and study well. Don’t forget to take breaks and go to sleep on time! All nighters and lack of sleep before an exam will do more harm than good.

New post tomorrow at 7!

Prayer requests? Questions? Comments? Click here!

Much love always,

Kumam 💘

Dear God,

Thank you so much for today. Thank you for another day to live for you. God, you are amazing. There is no one like you. There is no one besides you. You are worthy of all our praise. You deserve all the glory. God I come before you today asking that you be with me as I begin taking my final exams. I thank you for the understanding you have given me of *insert subject* and I just ask that you help me to apply what I have learned on this exam. Give me wisdom, Heavenly Father. I pray against any anxiety that may try to come and take over me, for your Word says that I should be anxious for nothing and pray for everything. I pray against any fear that may try to come and steal my thoughts. That is not of you, Heavenly Father. I ask that you give me your peace that passes all understanding. Help me to focus, God, on the things I that are in front of me. Help me to not be distracted by the things outside of my exams. I know that you will take care of them for me. God I love you and I thank you. I believe in You and your power. I know you will do these things for Your name’s sake. I am expectant of these things, Heavenly Father. May I be able to look back on this say and give You praise for the work you have done. Thank you for all that you have done, all you are doing, and all you will do.

In Your precious name,

Amen 🧡

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Being a college student has its difficulties. There’s a lot of work to do, a lot of organizations to join, a lot of people to meet, so much time and freedom to figure out, and so many decisions to make. I think that being someone who is actively pursuing a relationship with Christ also adds to the difficulties of the college experience.

For me personally it’s a time where I’ve experienced the most freedom. My parents sheltered me a lot growing up, and now I realize it was probably better that they did. I sometimes think about how sad I used to be not being able to go out as much as my other friends did. But what I am realizing now is that I’d probably not be who I am today if my parents didn’t raise me in the way I should go.

I do think, though, that being a light at this time of life is oh so important. There’s so many people who need you and the presence you bring. It can feel lonely at times. It’s not always easy to find people who are like-minded, and even when you do sometimes you realize you’re not as similar as you think or that they may not really be who they say they are. It’s in these times you learn how real the Bible is and how real that statement, “Know the Word for yourself,” actually is. People will try to teach false doctrine, they will try to make you turn elsewhere, I’ve experienced it a lot on campus. Remember how there’s so much freedom? People don’t always use it in the best way.

This is definitely a time where your foundation and faith in Christ are heavily tested. I’ve really had to adopt the practice of talking to myself to build myself up and also talking myself out of negative mindsets. There’s so many things that are thrown at you in these years and I’ve realized that if you the things you believe in are not embedded in your heart to the point where you know what you know what you know, then you will be swept away. Your college years is a place where you learn and grow, academically, but I never imagined how much I’d grow spiritually.

As hard as it can be, as many trials are thrown at you, people who judge you, people who watch you, people who unfriend you or take your energy from you, being a Christian at this time is so worth it. You have the opportunity to make such a huge impact on the people around, and you don’t even realize it most of the time. You have the opportunity to learn how to articulate what you believe in to those who may not understand, how to love people who may not fully understand or even agree with your beliefs, most importantly, it’s a great time to show people what God can do for someone who is faithful to him by just living for him. You’re a living testament to God’s goodness, bein given so many chances to win souls for Christ.

If you have any questions about being a Christian in college, please don’t hesitate to ask! I’d love to connect with you and share some of my experiences. Especially if you’re about to enter your first semester in the fall. Congratulations to the class of 2018 and welcome to the class of 2022!

If you’d like to know more about what it means to have a relationship with God, please do not, by any means, hesitate to ask! I’d love to help you get to know Christ and introduce to some people who can really help you in your journey!

Much love always,

by Chinny Okafor:

Have you ever noticed those clouds that kinda bunch up together to form what looks like either a badly made crown or what I imagine the top of a volcano eruption would look like- without the volcano. They're really close up together and have this beam of light in them that kinda looks like the sun is just sitting in that one conjunction of clouds. I have no idea how it happens and I refuse to find out-I don't want the science of it to ruin this for me. It's quite something. 

On my way back from Ohio I'm gazing outside my window, half asleep, counting the hours till I'm back home, "When I lost my heart to You" by Hillsong on repeat. The sky so congested with huge white blankets of clouds that there's almost no blue. I spot one of those sun-filled cloud clusters and I kinda just stare at it with the widest smile on my sore neck-supported face. How can the sun fit into just that bunch of clouds. I see another. Then another. I'm in tears at this point. How can clouds make me so emotional? But I'm not actually being emotional. My heart is happy. I'm crying because God is good. That's it. How can a God with the entire world in His hands on one end be able to design such magnificent details into puffy white floaty thingys and on the other create every atom, bone, hair and muscle in my body? My little mind is too lazy to try to calculate how much goes into the functionality of our lives and surroundings. It makes me feel quite small. But at the same time quite big to be considered as the most special by the creator of all things beautiful. As I was going to start balling in awe of all that God is, He told me to write about everything my heart just experienced. So here I am.

SIDENOTE- as I write this my head is burning up. Gods hand is literally sitting on my head right now and I can physically feel the fire of the Holy Spirit on me. Ain't that something!

I'm trying not to move my head around too much...

Anyway, back to the clouds. It started by a ray of sunshine hitting my hand. Kinda like God was saying "Hey look over here". I stared at my hand for a minute and thought about how much longer I wanted my nails to be. Then I looked up and got lost. That's how I ended up here. I guess as I study the sky and hope the rain doesn't come and ruin this for me, my biggest concern is how long I can remain here. I know the Presence of the Lord is with me wherever I go but I also kinda just want to keep feeling this forever. My head is still burning omg I'm in love!

Tomorrow will come. I'll get up and the day will bring its worries. I'll probably stare up into the sky in hopes that I'll feel exactly what I'm feeling right now and it's possible that nothing will happen. God isn't a God of feelings and tingling sensations. While He does do that and they're amazing (especially if you're like me with and overactive imagination and almost need those kinds of experiences so you don't convince yourself you made it all up *rolling my eyes at my stupid doubtful humanness* ) the Spirit inside of you is the realest part of you. Hold onto the beautiful moments like my cloud thingy that God gives you but remember that we operate in the spiritual.

To "contradict" *but not actually * what I just said- seek these random moments with God where He speaks to you by showing you something you see daily, placing His hand on your head, or whatever He chooses. I think He looks forward to our moments like these. I'll continue to seek them too. *PS my head is on actual FIREEEE wow!

This is literally my favorite week of the year. This week holds so much weight to a Christian’s life because this is the week that Jesus Christ paid the price for our sins. 

I’ve been doing a lot of reflection this week on my walk with God and I think if most Christians can choose one word to describe the center of a relationship with God I think most would choose love. It’s one of the first things I learned when it came to Christianity: that Christ died because He loved me. 

If you follow me on Instagram, you know how much I was deeping this seemingly simple / basic truth. But when you really think about the weight this gift holds, you’ll understand why I was almost crying in the middle fo my campus this week. I feel, I could be completely wrong, that this is one of those things that’s said so much to someone, especially if they’ve grown up in the church, that they could eventually start becoming numb to it and it becomes more of just something you know / say and the weight of it becomes a little less as more years pass. Maybe because people see it as basic, or “elementary” but it’s really the foundation of our faith.

John 3:16 (NIV) says: For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. 

To not lose the weight of this verse, I have to make it personal. So this week I thought, “For God so loved me...” And when I tell you for about 30 minutes I couldn’t get passed that part, so much came to me. I thought, Why would He choose me? Doesn’t He know all the things I’ve done? All the mistakes I’ve made? Why would He love me in this way? And what really, really struck me was that, I was not even alive yet, not even kind of in the making, not even existing in a human’s mind, and yet, He loved me. He knew exactly what I would do, exactly how my life would go. He knew how many times a lie would leave my lips, how many times I would pass judgement on someone, how many times I’d stumble in my faith or ignore His voice in this life and He still decided that I was worth it.  It was not by chance, or coincidence. He didn’t choose us by luck. It was perfectly orchestrated by our Creator.  What kind of love is that? It’s an overwhelming kind of love. An unfathomable kind of love. A love that makes you surrender because there’s nothing else you can do. It’s a great kind of love, an amazing love. 

I shared that this kind of love, the “in spite of” kind of love is one that so many of us look for in humans. What a lot of them have failed to realized is that the only One who can give us that kind of love is God. That’s what makes Him so great. If we were able to find this kind of love easily, we wouldn’t need Him! 

What makes this Friday “good”? I think it’s the fact that God loves me so much that He decided to make the Sacrifices of sacrifices. That He gave us a second chance knowing that one day there would be people walking this Earth ready to accept the love He has for us and spread it other people. I think this Friday is good because He is good. And forever He will be.

*If you’ve never experienced the love of God and have a desire, even just a small one, to do so, please do not hesitate to message me. God is always ready to accept someone with open arms.

Much love always,