Not Suprising

When medication says “do not operate heavy machinery” they’re probably mainly referring to cars, but my mind always goes to forklift.

It has honestly never occurred to me that this warning was about cars and not construction equipment

"your password is weak" well so is my memory so plz let me keep it

me: *is overwhelmed by things i absolutely have the time to do*

I wish I lived in the city like when ur pissed and you wanna storm off for a while you can go anywhere, to a cafe or a museum or a fucking park like where the hell am I gonna storm off to here in suburbia fucking walgreens?????

No wonder I’m so angst-ridden and frustrated.

I had this scheduled because it’s May 18th but it has an entirely new meaning this year

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry

the crushing guilt of being unproductive vs the exhaustion of being burned out. fight.

This has better pacing and comedic timing than most Hollywood movies

ljgkysetxdcfnvftjsthfgghkdfghj LMAOOO

Hockey rules I never knew about.

This is the way you’re supposed to do pranks!

I try SO hard not to make faces when I hear someone around me say wild shit but I just can’t stop myself