im good at being uncomfortable

(This post will grow over time; please check the original post for updates before reblogging!)

General

General personality disorder information

What does recovery look like for personality disorders?

Self-disorder (schizophrenia spectrum)

Hauntedselves' resources for SzPD

Cluster A 101

Personality style vs personality disorder

SzPD 101

Wikipedia page for schizoid PD

An overview of schizoid personality organization

Schizoid checklist

Millon's subtypes of SzPD

Five factor model for SzPD

Splitting in SzPD

Is being schizoid freeing?

Do schizoids experience loneliness?

Omnipotence and grandiosity in SzPD

Schizoid thought process

Splitting and social roles in SzPD

SzPD and dissociation from the body

r/schizoid wiki

The false self in SzPD

"Unlovability" in SzPD due to not existing

SzPD and faking emotions

Schizoid omnipotence

Differential diagnosis

SzPD vs introversion

Emotional detachment (SzPD) VS lack of empathy (NPD/ASPD)

SzPD, NPD, and OCPD

SzPD and AvPD and identity disturbance

Autism differential diagnosis venn diagrams (includes schizoid)

SzPD vs StPD in relationships

SzPD & BPD masterlist

One person's experience with comorbid SzPD and BPD

Further reading

Treatment of schizoid personality: an analytic psychotherapy handbook - Zachary Wheeler (free PDF)*

Disorders of the Self: New Therapeutic Horizons : The Matterson Approach - James Masterson (download from libgen)*

Personality Disorders in Modern Life: Second Edition - Theodore Millon (download from libgen)*

Some Thoughts about Schizoid Dynamics - Nancy McWilliams (free PDF)

Community

SzPD forum

r/schizoid

@schizoidpolls

@szpdadvice

@cluster-a-culture

@schizoidvision

Please use discretion and don't do something that will trigger you further, including triggering trauma or sensory issues!

Aggressive activities (Adrenaline-focused): Do not use sharp objects if you can't trust yourself around them in that moment.

Tear apart paper or napkins

Cut up boxes, plastic, or paper

Stab boxes or foam

Angrily scribble

Throw rocks at the ground

Scream into a pillow, or punch it

Passive activities (Adrenaline-focused):

Watch something scary (scary game, thriller movie)

Watch someone get angry (Youtube react videos, gamer rage)

Watch an action movie

Watch a fails video compilation

Sensory grounding

Hold an ice cube or splash cold water on your face - take a cold shower if you're really feeling it

Smell a strong scent, even an unpleasant one

Have a nice warm or cool drink

Any kind of strong pressure that won't injure you (weighted blanket, cuddle with your dog)

Listen to music or white noise

Use a heating pad or take a warm shower/bath

Creative outlets: (if you need the similarity, use red ink)

Draw on yourself or body paint

Do SFX makeup

Finger paint

Journal about your feelings honestly, even if they're negative

Make a moodboard

The clearest image of Venus ever taken !

Alexithymia sucks. This chart helps!

How are you feeling? You don’t know? Me neither! So I look at this chart several times a day (got reminders set on my phone) to check in on how I’m feeling throughout the day. I’ve been doing it for a few months, and it’s actually getting a lot easier to identify how I’m feeling.

Pro tip: some people have to rely more on how their body feels to tell them what they’re feeling emotionally. Work on trying to identify how certain emotions feel in your body. Work in broad strokes at first, before working on identifying more specific emotions. For example, try to notice how sad, happy, angry, and afraid feel. Where in your body do you feel them? What physical sensations go along with the emotions? It’s different for everyone!

and then you finally run into a scenario that is so serindipitously fucked that you have to make a copy of yourself to go die heroically. and everyone hates this plan, which you find stupid and frustrating, because they want to stop you from doing the thing you were MADE to do, the ending you've KNOWN ABOUT and CHOSEN NOT TO AVOID, the heroic sacrifice you had always planned for yourself and clearly your copy (as a copy of you) feels the same way.

but then you're not the self sacrificing hero. your copy is. You're the one behind the trigger. in the position of the humans, the ones who get to live as a result. and suddenly you have to stare your desire for self sacrifice in the face and realize that you don't want to kill yourself. that, being able to see yourself from the outside, you have to assign your own life some value because if you didn't you wouldn't hesitate to kill your copy. and if you dont want to give it the hero's ending it's INSISTING on, if it feels like it's not okay-- well shit maybe it wasn't okay every time you did the very same thing. maybe you never should have been fine with it. but youre realizing that maybe you don't want to die in self sacrifice in the same moment you have to enable that very thing for a version of yourself, and time is running out, and this is what you both had always planned for. you go through with it.

So a version of you gets the heroic ending it always expected. but it wasn't you. and you have to live with that.