i’m going to korea to study abroad this summer, but i’m also going to visit my grandfather’s grave in seoul. he passed away in late november and my family could not afford to send me to his funeral. i was the only person in my family to not attend. i was also in the midst of finals so my parents did not want me to jeopardize my grades, even for that. i was extremely depressed and suicidal following his death, and really didn’t recover for the most part until around two or three months later.

it’s been half a year and while i’m doing tremendously better, i still never received closure for his death. the last time i saw him in-person was in 2016, but my family has not been able to afford sending me to korea since i was a child. my parents own their own business, which they started around three years ago but before then, my mother (who was at then, my sole provider before remarrying) was working minimum wage. 

i have no established savings and currently, all of our money goes towards my student loans. (i’m the first person in my family to attend university so my family really didn’t know how to prepare for it.) i’m traveling to korea to study abroad also because with my grades, i earned a scholarship which should cover a lot of the costs of living and the flight itself, which we’ll only be paying around $500 with the scholarship.

however, the program itself is around $3,600. i’m applying for further financial aid from the university in korea itself and i’ve secured three jobs for my next semester, even as a senior who has a sixty-page thesis due in the same semester. i’ve already been trained over the past month, in the midst of writing finals and completing my internship, so it’s a definite i’ll be working all three.

BIRTH NAME   yi geon - 이건-  李建 ;  beom geon-yul - 범건율 - 范建律 ( formerly )  ALSO KNOWN AS   grand prince hyoik - 孝翼大君  //  HOUSE   house of yi   BORN   9 november 1981  //  REIGN   18 september , 2026 - 28 july , 2046   RESIDENCE changdeok palace , seoul , greater korean empire*  * alternate timeline where the imperial family stood as a symbol of resistance and hope and korea has retained its monarchy after the japanese occupation / post-ww2  PLAYLIST X

효익군 - 孝翼君 - PRINCE HYOIK 

the night is long and cold as the storm continues to brew . amongst the blizzard , a mansion stands strong as life and death travels between two rooms . there are whispers in the hallway of an omen : of something great or terrible ; of tragedy and birth - else the sky wouldn’t be acting up . you are born 9 november , 1981 , as your father - now , the late scholar beom - draws his last breath . and you are given a name , geon-yul , before the night ends whilst tranquil air replaces the chaos . 

at nights , your mother - the widowed princess - mutters stories of your father : the man whose heart was bigger than the moon , who never once forgot to stay humble . 

when you turn five , you are adopted by your grandfather - the current emperor - as a precaution in case your brother fails his part . you are given a new name , a new home , a new father with a condition that you mustn’t utter the name of your previous father . 

you are yi geon . grand prince hyoik . second in line to the throne . you are no longer your father’s son .

효익대군 - 孝翼大君 - GRAND PRINCE HYOIK 

the palace is a strange place , everyone hides behind their facade , and so do you . things have changed since your brother’s removal from heir apparent . you learn to lock away your emotions all the while you let them break you apart - piece by piece - and build you up again so you fit their ideal . you are an empty shell , filled with lust and greed that are not your own . you are no longer your own . 

you pretend to enjoy the late night study sessions , the riding lessons , the dinner parties and galas . you will do anything to satisfy your grandfather . you must wear your mask perfectly - that is the purpose of your existence . 

you leave korea to study abroad . it’s a liberating feeling to be on your own and you treasure every second of your freedom . with each phone call you receive of your grandfather’s deterioration , you dread going back to the prison you call home . 

황제 이건 - 皇帝 李建 - EMPEROR YI GEON , the sixth emperor of korea . 

you are a dutiful emperor , a benevolent scholar , an unfortunate royal . they say you take after the father you never saw and the grandfather you’ve sworn never to become . 

you start to long for something real - something of your own . you long to build the empire you have imagined , not those from the whispers from your court .  on your first day , you proclaim yourself as a beom .