confessions by and for roleplayers

If a published confession has enough indicators that you sincerely and 100% believe you know who or what it's about, then you need to contact the mods off anon so we can privately discuss the confession’s removal per our rules.

Be aware, we will never delete or censor confessions just on someone else's say-so. You'll need to offer actual proof. We don't accept screencaps as proof because it's too easy to doctor them.

For context of what my writing habits are, I will happily write multiple threads with the same muses. At any given time a partner will have around 5 or so novella threads with me at once and I love that, truly I do. They can be different verses or different points in a ship etc. I have never and will never harass partners for replies, I don’t bring them up in ooc chats in case they think I’m trying to rush them but I’m always happy to talk about the plot or a silly dynamic that the muses have going on either past or present if the other person brings it up. It’s in the rules on my blog that people really can take their time with responses and I’ll always be happy to carry on even with years between replies so I really hope this has not come from me demanding anything from them somehow.

These six specific incidents I’m trying to work out are when a writing partner is going through a genuinely very hard time and announces a semi hiatus they only respond to my threads and tend to leave others in the drafts. This can go on for years in some cases and I can confirm it with myself by scrolling back through their blog and I can see it’s just my threads as if it’s a private blog until someone scrolls far enough to see the announcement of whatever is going on that is responsible for my writing partner’s semi hiatus. The most recent one is a relatively new parter compared to others and for the last six weeks they have focused on my threads alone. We haven’t really talked much ooc yet either.

I know this isn’t necessarily a bad thing and that I imagine there’s some coping mechanisms at work going on via the threads but my threads are very rarely about nice things, though they can be slice of life there’s always some goal of the muses going on in the background of interactions.

My question is from what little context I will give without revealing myself and for the tone or wording I’ve used in this ask, can anyone explain if somehow I come across as pushy or demanding or maybe even entitled? I’m worried that these people think that if they don’t respond to my threads and my muses no matter what, that I would no longer be interested in being their friend or that I’d stop writing with them. It’s just because when I went through a really terrible time I didn’t want to write or engage with anyone at all and the contrast confuses me and has set me off into the spiral of overthinking because I can’t relate.

Thanks in advance to the admins and to anyone who responds <3

OP, I'll be honest - before I got down to the section where you said you were worried about being 'pushy' I hadn't even considered that might be a possibility. I think that's due to my own mindset when it comes to RPing. In my experience, although I enjoy writing with all of my partners, some of them are easier to write with than others. They're all fun (otherwise I wouldn't write them) but some require more mental effort on my part.

As you described your situation, all I could think was that you must be an easy person to write with, not the other way around. Because for me, if I really needed to take a break and/or ease up on my stress, but I didn't want to stop writing entirely, I would probably keep the threads that felt 'easy' and put a pause on the threads that I had more trouble with. I know you still don't know for sure what's up. But it doesn't hurt to consider the possibility it's something much more positive than what you've suspected.

Do our followers have anything they'd like to say or add?

Hey there, OP - it seems to me this kind of depends on how the whole situation is making you feel. Since there could be a lot of factors that change what you're feeling towards this person and their RPs with you, I'll going to reply based on how certain situations would make me personally feel.

If this person had gone completely silent and/or is still posting things but not posting ANY threads for me or anyone else, then I'd wait. They could be going through things in real life, they could be in a writing rut, they could be focused on something else - like an art project or a video game. In other words, tomorrow really might be the day they'll come back.

However, if this person is replying to a bunch of threads with other partners while yours have sat waiting for 6+ months, then I'd say it's probably time to cut your losses. Although, I admit, I'd probably wait a full year before moving on.

Nowhere did I say that anyone was "rude and insufferable" for wanting to write with me on their other blogs. I would never think that? I said it makes me uncomfortable when someone I've only just followed and don't know at all (we haven't written together, haven't gotten to know each other, nothing) starts pushing their other blogs onto me. That's all.

It's in my rules that I'm 1. mutuals only, and 2. I'm only open to other fandoms if I know/am in the fandom.

When someone in our first conversation, before we even talk about our muses or plot or anything, starts sending me links to their other blogs (for muses from wildly different genres than the one my muse is in, it's not like they shared similar vibes or anything) and pushing for me to follow them, without even saying, "hey, I also write these muses, any chance you'd be interested?" or anything like that... I didn't think I'd be seen as wrong for not appreciating that? Or when I say sorry, I'm not familiar with them, and they try to convince me to "just give it a chance" anyway? Or when they send me asks from those muses anyway because for some reason they think that if I follow one of their blogs, that counts as being "mutuals" on all of them? And again, this is before we interacted AT ALL. No threads, no memes sent, no posts liked or commented on. I did not know them. We'd done nothing but follow each other. If we'd been writing together a little bit, built some rapport? Sure. But that's not the case here.

I have a lot of muses across a lot of single muse blogs. I know the feeling of wanting to interact with someone with muses I have on another blog. But I wouldn't start begging them to follow my other accounts when they've shown no interest in the fandoms my other muses are from. I'd wait until we've written together a little, or until I see them mention liking the fandom... or I'd just quietly follow from those other accounts and see if they follow any of them back.

I'm not saying they're wrong for being excited at the thought of a new writing partner. I just find this specific behavior from a stranger uncomfortable. Pushy. Overwhelming. Maybe it's just mismatched energy. I don't know. But I didn't think I'd be viewed so negatively for it.

Referencing this post.

Referencing this post.

Many things can be right at once.

OC's and characters of color being marginalized and needing to have so much more. And they need voice to speak out and point things out.

The struggle of a non poc writing a poc character, oc or otherwise, and it being obvious to actual poc because the lack of understanding experiences is coming through the writing, and more so if it's seemed fetishizing depending of context... (the other side of the coin poc having very little options in canon characters and then maybe limited in face claims to make ocs so they write white characters and maybe get dogged on for that.)

Advocacy is important, no denying or belittleing how important it is....but this is a hobby of escapism where curating is the best thing you can do for yourself. Your strong words about the issue will cause guilt. Some can take it, recognize their part in it, and hopefully do better. Others can't. And won't. Some understand it but they're at the limit of all they can do and selfishly want to turn off their brain from the realness, and yeah it's a luxury, but still their right.

Referencing this post.

Referencing this post.

Previous mutuals of mine have communicated to that person regarding their excessive OOC posting in the past, to which they replied with "deal with it". So I concluded with that behavior as them they're aware, but hates it when some doesn't want to "deal with it" as they say.

While the OOC posts are tagged, yes, but not always. It's become excessive to the point it's better off to unfollow or block as they advised. I'm all for making friends and learning about an rp partner in time, but I don't want to be bombarded with personal issues within week 1 of following someone.

Referencing this post.

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i understand this could be hurtful but as someone that preemptively blocks people all the time, try not to dwell on it too much. these are some of the reasons i blog ppl for: they are someone i had blocked before on another account, they have too many fcs or oc types i don’t like engaging with, i don’t like the content of what they write (its triggering), they are close to another account that i am not on good terms with, their ooc posts make me uncomfortable.

none of these things are big deals or signs that u did something wrong per say, it’s just what people are comfortable with having on their dash or potentially writing with. it’s better they block u now than way later when u reply to an open and suddenly ure blocked without notice.

Referencing this post.