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behind every anxious middle school teacher is a more nervous and much more dangerous assassin... or something like that
not me trying not to add yet ANOTHER BloodyMary AU fic to my wip pile.
me: well, I'll just draw it!!! that will get it out of my system surely!
Me: ........... shit
this is an OLD au of mine but it's perfect for them honestly. it was an original story featuring a cyborg assassin being found in a dumpster by Some Dude. Yeah. Might be in love with Grace taking home the stray man he found in the Fucking Trash Can ;3;
A middle school teacher, two rocks and a convict against The Red Eye God, who will win??
My tenth chapter of Leftover Light is out!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Snippet of Grace blaspheming God below:
“You think you can stop it? You. Against that.” Simon gave Ryland a once-over in his red shirt and orange jumpsuit tied around his waist. Messy blonde hair, eyes creased with smile lines, and fidgeting hands.
“Well, it’s alive, isn’t it?” Ryland said, defensively, crossing his arms with Simon’s gaze on him. “Anything alive can be killed.”
Simon stared at Ryland. Naive, too-good-for-his-own-good Ryland, who just casually admitted he wanted to kill God. The words sounded wrong leaving his mouth, paired with his nonchalant expression. Was this why the Father feared scientists so much? Loathed them? Often, the Father raved against science being the antithesis to God and faith. Science only sowed the seeds of doubt, spreading poisonous vines that suffocated the light and truth of the tree. Was it because he knew that science would try to find a way to kill it?
“You… can’t kill God,” Simon managed.
"Pshh, it’s not god,” Ryland scoffed.
Simon stared at him.
Even the COI researcher had known it was God. Because a god makes sense of what it sees despite what it should be, the researchers' reverent voice had whispered.
“More like the devil. I mean, it was terrifying either way.” Ryland huffed, but Simon's mind was reeling. What did that have to do with anything? God was terrifying. Always had been. “If I believed in that sort of thing. Which I don’t. But hey, whatever floats your boat.”
Ryland gestured to him amicably.
“You don’t think it's a god,” Simon said slowly. “It… spoke to us.”
“Yeah,” Ryland puffed out his cheeks. “Nothing makes sense, but that’s because we haven’t discovered anything about it yet. Just because we don’t understand something doesn’t mean it’s god.”
He said it so simply. Suddenly Simon didn’t feel so bad about his doubts, about his wayward title he had to prove over and over again that he could discard.
I’m not a wayward, Father. I swear it, I swear, please, please- the blade was cool, but his blood was warm, trickling down his throat into the collar of his hood.
Then prove it, Simon. The leather hilt of the blade rough in the palm of his hand, the grey glint in his eye.
Ryland definitely would have been a wayward if he were on Eden, or, more likely, a COI scientist. At Ryland’s words, Simon still felt that built-in resistance, the Father’s voice ringing in his ears. God is the unknown, my son. All that we cannot and will not understand. You would doubt him, Simon? Trust your mortal judgement over his omnipotence?
The scientist hummed. “It’s most likely a terrifying alien from your universe. I’d rather deal with a terrifying alien than a terrifying, unkillable god, right?”
“I’d rather do neither,” Simon said dryly, breath shaking out of him at his blasphemous thoughts.
He gave a bitter chuckle. “Yeah, seriously. But, uh, it’s what we’ve got. I know you’d rather not deal with it. I don’t blame you, which is why we offered an alternative. I can’t…”
Ryland looked down and shuffled his white shoes. “I can’t guarantee you’re going to like what we’re doing if you stay.”
“You saw what it did to us. You can’t even get close without it punting us across the universe. How the hell are you expecting to kill it?” Simon asked incredulously.
“We’re still working on that." Ryland ran his hand through his hair, making it even messier. “But that's the thing, Simon. I have to be able to work on it. I have to try.”
“Why? Wouldn’t the smartest thing to do be preparing for the end? At least prepare supplies for moving as many people as you can to space before the Rapture,” Simon said.
“We’ve talked to the Eridians about it, and they’re holding a thrum. It's like a big meeting sorta…” Ryland's eyes took a watery sheen. “But that’s- that’s a good backup plan. If we fail.”
“You’re going to fail,” Simon said, and Ryland flinched.
“Mean, rude human!” Rocky angrily announced, but Simon wasn’t trying to be mean.
Simon pressed, “Anyone who's tried to find answers about the Light dies! There are whole audio logs, photographs from the SM-8 about it. The researchers. They all died because they were drawn to it. To understanding it. They thought it would save us. Instead-”
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I see so much of Simon being the vaguely unsettling one in the relationship and I love it and I support it but may I raise you; Grace is NOT normal about Simon in the SLIGHTEST.
Whenever he thinks Simon isn't watching, Grace is there.
Doing some gardening? Grace is watching. Learning how to mend clothes creatively? Watching. Learning how to fix little things around the Hail Mary? Watching. Sleeping? WATCHING. Always while half working on his own stuff of course, he has things to do and he also needs a reasonable excuse for 'nono I'm busy here I don't know what you're talking about'.
Documenting his eating habits and his mutations and his injuries healing and at first it's just a good thing to keep track of but it eventually becomes a source of comfort to review all the pages and remember that Simon is HERE despite EVERYTHING.
And Grace KNOWS that this is kind of creepy he just can't really bring himself to CARE anymore. A solid 75% of his social rules have been broken apart by hanging out with an alien rock spider for 4 years he's not above a little indulgence in the presence of another human. And it's not like Rocky knows this isn't normal. Honestly Rocky is just happy to see his favorite human interacting with another human.
This is the first and ONLY human he has had contact with in YEARS. He is just a little obsessed. And it's just a little concerning. He gets better about it after they're on Erid (Simon's not leaving a planet. No way would he ever. Simon's staying. Statement.)
Just. Grace being as afraid of Simon disappearing as Simon is afraid of Grace disappearing. They cling to each other like feral animals.
hoooo buddy this one is a three-fer. i couldn't fit everything i wanted on the dual pages and adding a whole other double page felt like a lot, ergo: 3 of them
I think this is Simon's first genuine smile in my fic. He gets to be excited, as a treat. Pilot Simon!
(Wip for my tenth chapter)
“I could give it a go,” Simon offered.
Ryland straightened and blinked. The frustration etched onto his expression loosened in his surprise.
Slowly Ryland turned to look at him. “You… could? You know how to pilot?”
Simon scoffed a little bit. “Of course I know how to pilot. I was a soldier in fucking space. It’d be pretty useless to-”
“You were a soldier.”
Simon froze. Did he not mention that? Shit. Information was slowly bleeding out of him, and regardless of the debt he owed, Simon was having a hard time not panicking at the valuable resource he was steadily sharing. Simon had wanted to keep his violence tightly contained, his crimes hidden from the crew. He tensed, hoping they wouldn’t connect the role with the word Butcher, that they wouldn’t think too hard about what Simon had to do as a soldier or what war he was fighting.
Information was the only thing he had to vouch for his survival.
If he proved to be useless, they wouldn’t keep him. If he didn’t help with the mission, they could let the Eridians take him to their planet. Ryland trusted them, but Simon knew that they wouldn’t just let him live on Erid in peace, not without the Savior of their world protecting him. Simon hated needing protection, but he wasn’t stupid enough to think he had any power over this situation. He was at the complete mercy of Ryland and the Eridians, and if he wasn’t good, then he needed to be useful. Simon was trying to be both, but the well of useful information he’d gathered was slowly drying up.
But if he had a role, if he could do something, then Simon would feel more secure in his place here. He just had to earn it.
Simon swallowed. “...I piloted smaller flighters. Nowhere near as fancy as this, but I was good at what I did. I’ve been watching how you do it. I think I can do it with one arm, if you take notes. We… could switch.”
“I… dunno,” Ryland exhaled. “It’s pretty tricky to fly this thing. It took me a long time to figure out.”
“I’ve flown in space before, and I didn’t need any fancy shit to do it either,” Simon huffed and then took a steadying breath, “Look- you’re tired, no point in arguing it- I’m bored out of my mind and I know how to do this. Let’s switch. I know we move it 100 clicks out, then you gotta redo the search grid before we do this all over again. 360 turn, stop, angle it up 5 degrees, 18 planes- I’ve been paying attention.”
“I didn’t think you hadn’t,” Ryland protested. “It’s easier to watch than do.”
“If I suck, I won’t ask again,” Simon said. “I know you have no reason to trust m-”
“It’s not that!” Ryland said, “I just-”
He looked over at Rocky and Adrian and stopped. He let out a long sigh and raised his eyebrows at them.
“It is Grace’s ship. Rocky cannot decide.”
“Adrian wants to see Simon fly ship,” Adrian said. That’s why they were his favorite. Simon gestured to them and then gave an expectant look to Ryland.
“So?” Simon prompted, unable to keep the hope from fluttering in his chest.
“Alright,” Ryland sighed. “It's hard to get the hang of, so if it doesn't work out, it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with being a note taker-”
Simon grinned and unbuckled his seatbelt. He drifted in zero gravity, angling toward Ryland’s seat. Much more reluctantly Ryland started to unbuckle, and Simon clasped his shoulder amicably. “You won’t regret this.”
Ryland jolted at the touch at the same time he released the claps on his seatbelt, wobbling a bit like he had forgotten how to move in zero gravity.
“Right! Uh, yeah, I mean, no, sure, give it go!” Ryland stumbled. “Hopefully the flighters you piloted have comparable mechanisms-”
Simon tuned him out. He was thrumming with excitement as they switched places. The throttle was warm and sweaty, but Simon didn’t care. It was smooth and sleek and new. It was the nicest cockpit he’d ever been inside, nowhere near the rust buckets Eden and COI had. He couldn’t contain the smile twitching at his lips as he took a steadying breath to calm his nerves. Don’t screw this up.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
EXTREMELY important tags. Please can we have some more un-tropified Grace and Simon. It is easy and fun to write I know. BUT LOOK AT THEM. The reason we love them is how similar they are!!!!!
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"simon would definitely beat grace in a fight no question" is taken for granted in a lot of fics and i don't want it to be!!! yes whatever simon is physically bigger and more superficially muscular, but grace is
taller, higher center of gravity
also pretty fucking muscular (no it was not just the ship, NMES devices MAINTAIN muscle they don't build it)
prone to explosive anger
fucking scrappy, doesn't fight fair (the chase scene)
FAST (how fucking far he got in the chase scene. which makes sense because he does cardio literally every day)
not to mention if you believe in coltlandgentry propaganda do you seriously think court wouldn't make damn sure his baby brothers could protect themselves. do you think colt wouldn't teach his notoriously clumsy twin how to take the least amount of damage from a fall or a hit.
like... let him get the upper hand. let him win, even. typical fanfic scene with simon attacking grace when he first wakes up on the ship, but grace locks in and triggers muscle memory he maybe didn't even know he had, gets simon pinned or in some kind of secure hold. "ohhh-kay. hey there. sorry, that's my bad for startling you. my name's grace..."
This version of the transcript was handwritten and edited by myself over a week after being tasked by Markiplier's deaf community. It took twelve hours and many cups of coffee. This is not the transcript from Fandom Wiki. It is from-scratch.
This is NOT the official transcript, either. Please do not get that confused. I spent many hours slowing down audio to interpret tones due to the involvement of requested tone tags. It's eons better than what we had previously, but it will never be truly correct due to the nature of it being unofficial, even though I tried my absolute best. This is meant as a free writer's resource and does not accrue any revenue.
This version includes:
Tone tags for nearly all lines.
Italic stressors for easier tone interpretation.
Sound effects, music indication and descriptions, and basic contextual movement beats.
Indication of slurring, stuttering, muttering, etc. that was not previously included on the YouTube closed captioning (I literally counted every single stutter for accuracy.)
Extra dialogue from whispering voices that were audio enhanced and then interpreted (best I possibly could.)
Access to open annotation and commenting.
I hope this helps the community out! It was a labor of love.
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