The Blog of an Assbutt Padawan

N I C E okay

Remus can sleep literally ANYWHERE, and sleeps like a fucking brick. Normally has to be shaken awake because he never wakes up to any sort of alarm, no matter how loud. Sleeps curled up in a ball of sheets on most nights, doesn’t move too much. The only exception is when it gets closer to the full moon each month, he’s more restless and wakes up at odd hours and either reads, writes, or wanders around a bit until he’s tired enough to fall asleep again. He also doesn’t sleep as well during those nights, tosses and turns and usually knocks either his sheets or himself onto the ground at some point. The restlessness of those times just causes him to be even more tired once he’s gotten through them, hence the heavy and frequent sleeping, and it’s a bit of a cycle that he’s gotten used to. The other boys take turns waking him up in the mornings: Peter is the most gentle and talks in a soft voice and smiles, James serenades him horribly until he can’t stand it anymore, and Sirius gives him teasing shoves and pokes and sometimes jumps onto his mattress. 

Peter is a pretty heavy sleeper, as well, and fucking talks in his sleep. Mumbles and laughs and screams and scares the living SHIT out of the other boys. Sits up in his bed and says something and everybody wakes up like ??? you okay dude and then he just crashes down again and he’s out like a light. SNORES. HE SNORES. He doesn’t move much in his sleep, sleeps mainly on his stomach with his face smushed into his pillow, sometimes wakes up with his head underneath it. Sleepwalks occasionally, which the boys either find hilarious or terrifying depending on the night. Just a fucking weird ass sleeper, but gets a lot of good rest. Always ends up going to class with toothpaste in the corners of his mouth because he was half asleep while brushing his teeth. 

Sirius has a hard time sleeping through the night, like he can’t turn his thoughts off a lot of the time and has to mentally concentrate on relaxing in order to fall into a deep sleep. But once he does, he generally sleeps rather well. Not a heavy sleeper, wakes up to strange sounds and is mainly the one who hears Peter talking in his sleep and catches him sleepwalking, leads him back to his bed, and then it takes him like an hour to fall back asleep himself. He and Remus are sometimes awake in the middle of the night at the same time and just sort of silently sit together or talk quietly in one of their beds. One of those people who sleeps with their legs all flailed out at odd angles, his arms covering his face or hanging off the side of his bed. Drools on his pillow. Horrible morning breath.

What if she didn’t like?? In DH she says “James is feeling a little antsy and Dumbledore still has his Invisibility Cloak so no chance of a little excursion” (or smth like that" but

Do you realize

He could have just transformed

And wandered around as a stag

But if she didn’t know he couldn’t have because he would have let the secret lose

And just as easily he could have transformed on Oct. 31 and carried Lily and Harry to safety because stags are a lot stronger and have more endurance??? So??

And it’s the Halloween Feast in 1977 and Dumbledore is talking but then Lily stands up, and he just smiles and sits down looking at her expectantly. Lily climbs onto the table, pulls out a piece of paper from her pocket. After a few shaky lines she rolls her eyes, crumbles it up, and says “Oh fuck it”

Then she beautifully gives a speech about all the attributes of James Potter’s hair and “cute ass” and everything on his body (at this point he’s redder than her hair) and she ends it by saying, “And so I thought ‘If I want to ask a Potter out I might as well do it the Potter way by socially killing him, like the 547 times he did the same to me.’ James, you are an arrogant toerag, but you are my arrogant toerag so I guess I’m stuck with you. Do you want to snog sometime?”

The Great Hall is just silent–ignoring Dumbledore’s clapping–and older students are whispering to the younger ones why this is such a monumentous statement. James is frozen. Sirius is cherering. Peter is handing Remus money. Remus is getting fed up with James and shoves him off the bench and starts chanting, “Kiss her! Kiss her! Kiss her!”

James stumbles down the table, offers Lily a hand down, and kisses her and mumbles, “Yeah, I’d like to properly snog you sometime as well”

you know how deer jump like a mile in the air when they’re surprised?

imagine lily tapping james’ shoulder in the library and he shoots straight up in his chair while madam pince yells at him for disturbing the quiet

like discussing books that they have read and creating a book club

and them complaining about their boyfriends like old wives

drinking tea together

snuggles when sirius and james are out being idiots

gossiping about whose dating who and the latest on relationships in their year

like i always hear about lily and james patrolling the halls as head girl and head boy BUT we all know remus was a prefect, can u just imagine lily and remus patrolling together scaring anyone who dares approach them

sarcastic remarks and eyerolls shared between them

talking about all things muggle such as ROCK BANDS 

EMERGENCY DANCE PARTIES LATE AT NIGHT

always carrying chocolate for each other when they get frustrated/stressed

staying up in the library studying together

tickle fights

remus giving lily piggy back rides

lily tackling remus when excited

remus leaning his elbow on lily’s head to annoy her

lily poking remus in the tummy when bored

lily taking extra care of remus during full moons

remus being suuuupppperrr protective of lily like almost as bad as james

So lately I’ve seen a bunch of posts going around with headcanons and ideas about the Marauders and Lily (such as height, appearance, personality, etc) based on things we forgot aren’t actually canon. Anyway, I’ve compiled an abridged list of descriptions of the Marauders and Lily so that we can all remember what’s truly canon and what isn’t.

James Potter

“The tall, thin, black-haired man standing next to her put his arm around her. He wore glasses, and his hair was very untidy. It stuck up at the back, just as Harry’s did” (PS 208).

“James’s eyes were hazel, his nose was slightly longer than Harry’s, and there was no scar on his forehead, but they had the same thin face, same mouth, same eyebrows. James’s hair stuck up at the back exactly as Harry’s did, his hands could have been Harry’s, and Harry could tell that when James stood up, they would be within an inch of each other’s heights” (OOTP 641).

“the tall black-haired man in his glasses” (DH 343).

Sirius Black

“whereas Black was a tall, full-grown man” (POA 340).

“said Sirius, standing up. He was rather taller than Snape”  (OOTP 520).

“He was very good-looking; his dark hair fell into his eyes with a sort of casual elegance neither James’s nor Harry’s could ever have achieved, and a girl sitting behind him was eyeing him hopefully, though he didn’t seem to have noticed” (OOTP 642).

“Sirius stared around at the students milling over the grass, looking rather haughty and bored, but very handsomely so” (OOTP 644).

Remus Lupin

“Though quite young, his light brown hair was flecked with gray” (POA 74).

“He paused when he entered, looked around, and said, with a small smile, ‘I haven’t poisoned that chocolate, you know…’” (POA 86).

reminder that Lupin is the one who thought of dressing Snape in Augusta Longbottom’s clothing he knew how to make a joke (POA 135-137)

Peter Pettigrew

“He was a very short man, hardly taller than Harry and Hermione. His thin, colorless hair was unkempt and there was a large bald patch on top” (POA 366).

“his pointed nose and his small, watery eyes” (POA 366).

“a small, mousy-haired boy with a pointed nose. Wormtail looked anxious; he was chewing his fingernails, staring down at his paper, scuffing the ground with his toes. Every now and then he glanced hopefully at his neighbor’s paper” (OOTP 642).

Lily Evans

“She had thick, dark red hair that fell to her shoulders and startlingly green almond-shaped eyes” (OOTP 647). ➝ age 15

“her long dark-red hair falling over her face” (DH 343). ➝ age 21

prompt: did you actually just blue shell me on our date you fucker

prompt list here

“So Evans,” James said, one hand behind his back. “This has been a pretty great date so far.” She rolled her eyes, a teasing smile growing on her face. “What? Don’t tell me you didn’t like spending an hour at Zonko’s.”

“That was very nice,” she allowed. “Although I did have to keep you from buying their whole supply of Dungbombs.”

“A poor decision on your part, in my view. And,” he continued, “I’d say that Muggle restaurant you introduced me to was top-notch.”

“I’ve always had a soft spot for both Muggle and Wizarding Thai.”

“But you know what would make this date truly perfect?”

“Sex?” she suggested mildly. James choked.

“I, uh, didn’t realize that was on the table,” he said. “But, uh… since Sirius is due back from work in an hour or so…” His hand emerged from behind his back, holding a plastic case.

Lily stood up straighter. “Oh, you’re so on, Potter.”

the president of guinea built/is building infrastructure and school and wells all over the country and is decreasing youth unemployment exponentially

the president of cote d’ivoire made school mandatory of children ages 6-16 and banned plastic bags while also building ultra modern trasportation infrastructure

finally my nephew interrupted her to say,  “He wants to be called Ben. He’s a boy now. You can’t call him a girl if he’s a boy.” 

and right after that, she started using my pronouns and name correctly. i guess it kind of hits you hard when a 5 year old child calls you out, cause anytime i’d try to correct her she’d keep making the excuse, “It’s hard, I’m trying.” 

When I went home for my birthday this past week, my parents were using the right name/calling me Ben but using the wrong pronouns. When I gently reminded them of my pronouns, my step dad was incredibly defensive and yelled at me and said not to bring it up. The next day, (my actual birthday), I was alone with my 14 year old brother. I told him I was bummed, told him the story and asked if he wouldn’t mind trying to use the correct pronouns around our family to lead by example/encourage them. He was like yeah no problem dude! Layer that night, my mom used the wrong pronouns and my brother responded with “yeah, I think he would like that.” And looked at me and smiled and my mom responded using the correct pronouns.