Ink and stardust

~

Caleb inhaled and simply listened as the man rambled on. Bit. So the man was a werewolf then, there was only one other kind that he knew of that was turned when bitten and he’d already ruled vampire out. “Yeah, listen, I don’t work for anybody and I have no idea who bit you.” he was certain he knew who it wasn’t at least, “Look you can pretend you didn’t get bit and all that, I don’t really give a shit, but you did. Just like a lot of other people did. Just like my dad did. Being a werewolf doesn’t make you a monster. If you were a monster you would have been one before you were bitten.” 

-

“Given that one of the definitions for the word monster is a large, ugly, and frightening creature i’m going to say you can’t tell me i’m not. Losing time every month, not knowing what I did, breaking ever bone in my body over and over. Not being able to have a meltdown without my body trying to shift when I haven’t even been doing this a year so I get stuck in a painful grotesque half shift. Yeah I get it other people have gone through it. I know that. What the problem is, is everyone seems more concerned that I get over it than actually helping me accept it.”

SEND “BEEP” FOR A RANDOM TEXT FROM MY MUSE. | @simonxtolch

15. A text for help.

[txt >> Simon]: I've been told I need to stop seeing myself as a monster.

SEND “BEEP” FOR A RANDOM TEXT FROM MY MUSE. | @reaperxnoah

18. A drunk text

[txt >> Noah]: i;vw hasa sebrn borrles of whsikey

[txt >> Noah]: Whewn willa /i stp bewing as mo nstder

[txt >> Noah]: Damn i t. It's wearing pff already.

~

“I know I would sound insane to someone who actually doesn’t know what I’m talking about. Then again I wouldn’t say the things I am to them in the first place. I learned how to keep this kind of thing a secret before I’d even had my first kiss.” he gave a shrug, “but be my guest and keep pretending that you catching my phone just happened to be completely normal human reflexes.” 

-

“Look I don’t know what kind of agenda you have or if you’re working for the same people who sent the asshole who bit me to my house so he could berate and mock me. I don’t want this. I never wanted this. So leave me alone. I was fine the way I was. I didn’t need to learn about all this extra stuff. It’s made everything worse. So maybe I like pretending I’m not a monster now, you don’t get to decide if I do that or not.”

~

Caleb was about to interrupt him, when he seemed to have been beaten to it by the man, himself. “Yes, aren’t human. A number of them have heightened senses, I can scratch vampire off the list, seeing as how you were quick to catch the phone before it fell, but not vampire quick.” 

-

It unnerved Ares that this person could tell he wasn’t human anymore. Did his very existence scream monster now? “You know you sound insane right now, don’t you?” He’d been told not to let anyone know. Why would he allow this stranger to just out him?

“I remember you,” Noah assured the man, recognizing both him and his dog. He tilted his head to the side. “And you don’t sound like a crazy person, though I’m not entirely sure what you mean by ‘people like you’. Everybody is different. I’ve never had a client who’s just like another client. Why don’t we first start with why you’re here in the first place? Why are you seeking therapy?”

-

Ares sighed, so he really did have to run the risk of sounding like he’d lost all sense of reality. He had hoped that other people who were different might be able to sense it and he wouldn’t have to admit it out loud. “I um... I was bitten.” He paused. He hated the word anyway. His whole brain rebelled against it every time. He was a man of science and this wasn’t science. “By a werewolf.”

-

When Ares told him that he was autistic, he let out an ah because this wasn’t something he had encountered (as far as he knew) before in a werewolf, his senses must’ve gone into overdrive to half shift the way he had done. 

“It shuts from both sides… look, I can’t begin to understand how you’re feeling, or not feeling as I’m neurotypical, but I do want to help you through this. Eventually, James will have to take over as he did turn you, you’re going to have to let him but it can be on your terms. I know it’s scary and new, but I promise, all this? It does get better, it just takes some time, some times it takes years, it will depend on person. James for example couldn’t accept it for a long time, it’s only very recently when he’s felt at home in his new skin. I knew what I was getting into when I was turned and that’s not common among our types because accidents happen, some wolves do it on purpose as well as some sort of boast like ‘look how many I can turn to make myself a pack’.” 

Christian pondered for a second. “I could also provide you with a support group of supernaturals like yourself.”

-

“Then he’s a hypocrite, isn’t he?” He appreciated that Christian would help him for the time being though. “I gotta be honest. I don’t know if I can forgive him, not just for the bite but for berating me and leaving me in pain because I’d partially shifted.” Ares ran a hand through his hair. “Right now the only werewolves i’m comfortable around are you and Simon. Even if you did give me some questionable advice which I still haven’t taken.”

Would he be comfortable in a support group? It would help, he knew that. It was probably for the best. “Yeah actually, I’d like that.”

~

“It’s not uncommon to hear something before you see it.” Caleb started, “and with how easily you were able to catch it, there must have been something that triggered your reaction.” he gave a little shrug of his own, “besides, hearing seems to be one of the more enhanced senses in those who aren’t human.” it wasn’t that sight wasn’t, it was just that it seemed to be used less or just in certain situations, such as having night vision.

-

“Yes but something falling doesn’t usually make a sound that human ears can catch.” Ares eyed him wearily. “Perhaps it was just a lucky catch. You had knocked into me after all perhaps it was...” Ares didn’t finish his sentence as he realised what the young man had said. “Aren’t human?”

-

Kira glanced at the screen when he showed her and she let out a small squeal. “Oh they are so cute!” She gushed for a moment then shrugged. “It happens, you get over it and move on with your life.”

-

“That easy, huh?” He gave her a small smile. He’d only had one significant relationship in his life and it was still effecting him years after she was gone. Different situation of course but it still surprised him how people could move of so quickly. He was still adjusting to the leaving of someone he’d only just developed feelings for that were assumed to be unrequited. 

Elena wasn’t sure what she was seeing at first, but when she stepped closer and saw the man in obvious agony, she gasped and hurried forward.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” she said quickly, keeping her voice soft as she slowed to a stop and held her hands out. She knew she had to be careful; a hurt animal was prone to violence. Slowly, she stepped closer, lowering her hand toward his nose so he could get her scent. “I’m one too. I’m going to try and help you, okay? But you have to listen and do what I say. I need you to take deep, slow breaths. I know it’s scary and painful, but you’re safe, I promise.”

(( @ares-trilling​ ))

-

Ares wasn’t capable of words. Stuck in between due to his failed shift he was more wolf than human but not enough to even walk let alone think. He could hear someone talking and then there was the scent of a wolf coming from the hand near his face. Nova lifted her head from where she had basically plastered herself to Ares’ misshapen body and whined at the young woman as if distressed she couldn’t help her owner. 

He closed his eyes trying to reel his panic in. Meltdowns didn’t last forever and while there was pain to accompany this one he had been laid there long enough now he was starting to go numb. Safe. He was safe. The bones in his hand snapped back into place and he yowled in pain before trying to focus again.

[ ESCORT ] : sender accompanies the receiver home late at night, in order to ensure they’re safe. @celeste-lee

Ares walked alongside Celeste, his hands in his pockets, his head bowed somewhat. Nova trotted along on his free side. He'd been feeling more isolated than ever lately but Celeste was still a constant he seemed to be able to count on. Even if it was something as simple as her walking him home. After what was probably too long of a silence he spoke up. "...People want me around, right? I just... I've been feeling so isolated."

~

Caleb waited for the inevitable sound of the phone hitting the pavement and the screen cracking. Only that’s not what happened. The man he’d bumped into had caught it before it did. Instincts like that weren’t human. It wasn’t even that the man had moved super fast either, so vampire was out of the question,. “Right. Thanks” he said taking the phone from him, “so, did you hear it falling or something?” he asked curiously, an attempt to try and work out what this man was. 

-

“Hear it?” Ares wasn’t quite sure what he had done, really. He saw it, didn’t he? “I don’t know. I just moved.” He shrugged, knowing he couldn’t just admit to having faster reflexes but there was something in what the younger man asked that caught Ares’ attention. “Why did you say hear?”

-

“Wait, go back, you have an instagram for your pets?” Kira looked up at him again. “And you’re not showing me this, why? What pets do you have?” She asked him now. “I have a French bulldog at home. She was me and my ex-boyfriends, but he’s pissed off out of town.” 

-

“Oh um, let me just...” Ares pulled out his phone to bring up the app. “I have Nova my Samoyed service dog and Luna my black american longhair cat.” He showed her his screen when he finally had the page up. “Oh, well I’m sorry you went through that.” He said awkwardly. He’s never been left in such a way before so he wasn’t sure how to relate.

-

“The trick is to focus.” Christian explained. “Slow down, sit down somewhere quiet and focus your senses, filter out those that you don’t want to hear or smell and focus on that particular thing.” he told him. 

The hybrid soon led them through the woods, only stopping a couple of times to sniff the air so he could have a grip on where they were going without a map or being a wolf. “Nearly there.” Soon enough, Christian was pulling open an underground bunker after pulling off weeds and fallen branches. “Tada.”

-

“That’s the thing. Focusing isn’t always that easy for me. Sometimes, yeah I can focus the same as anyone else but sometimes literally every little thing in the environment will distract me or I’ll go the opposite way and I’ll be so hyper focused on one thing I can’t focus on anything else. I’m not neurotypical. What works for most might not work for me. I half shifted by accident because I got so upset with the guy who bit me that I ended up going into a melt down. His response was to tell me to control my emotions and walk off. I’m autistic, I can’t always do that. Masking is one thing but there are gonna be times where I can’t keep it in, where it’s going to get out and before I just had to think about stimming and getting overwhelmed. Now I worry that I could seriously hurt someone.”

Maybe he was talking too much but Ares was desperate for guidance and he couldn’t keep getting it from a kid ten years younger than him. Ares watched as Christian cleared the entrance to the bunker and there was a slight sinking feeling in his gut. This was it now. His future. Every month, hiding himself away. He moved towards the entrance. “It shuts from both sides?”

Caleb hung up the phone in the office of the auto shop. Having just spent a good five minutes explaining to the man on the other side that if he brought the car in now no one would be there, and the come by in an hour when someone would be back from lunch. Now, that he was finally able to grab his stuff and head out he started making his way towards some of the local restaurants. 

As he walked he pulled his phone out searching to see if he could order ahead at any of them, and it was this distraction that caused his shoulder to hit against someone as he walked. The impact just enough to send the phone crashing to the ground below. “Fuck!”

@ares-trilling​

-

Ares moved on instinct as he noticed the phone start to fall. Catching it before it could hit the ground he offered it to the young man. “I think this is yours.” He hadn’t meant to knock shoulders with the shorter man but he’d been twisted up in Nova’s lead and had been trying to right himself when they had collided. “You should be careful, it’s so easy to break phones these days.”

James was done.  He was not going to stand around for this shit.  The older wolf snorted.  “First step, learn to control your fucking emotions.  You wanna throw a fucking pity party then go for it.  I ain’t here to babysit some whiny brat.  Hotel, kid.  Last time I’ll say it.”  With that he walked away, desperately in need of a drink.

-

At that point Ares knew James had said something but his focus had narrowed so much that the words didn’t register with him. Stuck between a failed shift and a melt down. He was in pain and everything was too much and he couldn’t stop it. Even after James left he was stuck there. He had curled up as much as he could unable to move until the pain subsided and his body righted itself. A cold wet nose pressed itself to Ares’ cheek as Nova pushed her way in and settled next to him, doing her best to calm him and make sure he didn’t hurt himself. For the time being all he could do was lie there and wait.