I Understand. I've Always Understood.

First and foremost: I am perpetually, hopelessly obsessed with both Fenris and my Hawke, Rowan. If you wanna make my day, ask me to write about them ;P

I'm feeling up for some smut tonight (March 13) if anyone wants to indulge me!

OC Info Posts (still working on the rest):

Rowan Hawke + some info about his relationship with Fen and Anders

Romantic pairings I'd like to write for:

Zevran/m!Warden (Harley Cousland)

Nathaniel/m!Warden (Harley)

Fenris/m!Hawke (Garrett or Rowan)

Anders/m!Hawke (Garrett or Rowan)

Varric/Hawke (Marian or Garrett)

Isabela/Merrill

Dorian/m!Inquisitor (Cain Trevelyan)

Solas/m!Inquisitor (Cain)

Cassandra/Varric

Cain Trevelyan/August Everett (non-protag mage OC)

Emmrich/m!Rook (Iovianus Mercar)

Platonic pairings I'd like to write for:

Rowan & any member of the Hawke family

Mage!Garrett & either sibling

Any of the Kirkwall gang

Cain & his brother, Adam

Single characters I'd like to write about:

Any of the ones listed above :]

Atras DeRiva (was once a Rook of mine, but his story + personality ended up outgrowing the limits of a canon Rook)

Prompts + Prompt Lists:

Kiss prompts

More kiss prompts

Even more kiss prompts

Physical affection prompts

NSFW prompts

Subtle smut prompts

Smut dialogue prompts

Intimacy prompts

Morning after prompts

Budding romance prompts

Pining/yearning prompts

Prompts for sharing a bed

Injury prompts

Sickfic prompts

66 caretaking lines

Protective prompts

Hurt/comfort prompts

More hurt/comfort prompts

Recovering after a battle prompts

"I'm kind because I choose to be" prompts (these would be very good for Rowan *wink wink* *nudge nudge*)

"I can't" prompts

"What are we?" prompts

"I'll keep you safe" prompts

Huge prompt collection with lots of options

Aside from those prompt lists, feel free to send me anything from any list you've come across, or literally anything else you want! Song lyrics (I have a playlist for Rowan linked in his info post if you need ideas), aesthetics, dynamics, scenarios, dialogue... whatever comes to mind!

Content I'm willing to write:

Smut, fluff, angst, whump. Most things, honestly. I'm not bothered by problematic/dark content or ships, so if you feel like prompting or requesting something like that, go right ahead :) Even if it's not my cup of tea, it's no harm done. If written and posted, it will be thoroughly tagged and given the appropriate content warnings so anyone sensitive can filter it out.

Content I am NOT willing to write (squicks):

Pregnancy/birth (breeding kink is fine tho!), anything to do with scat (piss is fine), feederism, and foot stuff. Said non-judgmentally and with all the love in my heart, I am simply just not into the things listed.

@freedomspromise

Hell yeah, thank you so much for the prompt! It fit really nicely with an scenario that's been on my mind lately, so I had a great time with this one ;P

@dadrunkwriting

Thank you for the prompt!! Here's a little post-Battle-of-Kirkwall blurb :3

@dadrunkwriting

Sweat beaded on his skin, dripped from his face, and disappeared into the blood leaking out around his hands. Rowan sat slumped, propped up against the smooth stone wall of a Hightown manor; trying with everything in him to keep himself together, to take deep, even breaths, to not writhe with the searing agony tearing along his every nerve, and- Oh, maker. He grit his teeth against a cry of pain, managing to stifle it into a strained groan.

Of course, it had been too much to hope for that every templar had heard the news that the battle was over, that Cullen had managed to wrangle all of them back into the Gallows. They had been so close. A few blocks more and they would've made it to the rendezvous point at the gate to Sundermount, to the rest of their friends, to escape. He coughed weakly, and felt something warm spill from his mouth in the same instant that fire ripped through his abdomen, doubling him over and sending a fresh gush of blood out from the spaces between his fingers. It was sticky and hot and so, so much. Through the gathering fog that crept through his mind, dulling his thoughts and senses, he wondered vaguely if he had any healing potions. He tried to fumble with his belt pouch, but his fingers seemed to be missing cues.

A metallic clang rang out, barely heard through the haze gradually consuming every bit of his awareness, as Fenris felled the last templar. It seemed both after an eternity and in an instant that Fenris was dropping to one knee in front of him, handsome face stricken with worry and spattered with blood that was not his own.

"Rowan! Fasta vas– How bad is that wound?"

Without waiting for an answer, he tore into Rowan's belt pouch himself and fished out the last potion. It was less than halfway full. Muffled dismay clamored somewhere far in the back of his mind. Fenris swore again, but uncorked the bottle and tipped what was left into Rowan's mouth. The iron on his tongue mingling with the herbal taste of the potion was unpleasant, to say the least, but he didn't have long to ponder flavors before it began to take effect. His senses flooded back to him, though that meant the throbbing pain in his stomach redoubled. It took his breath away, and he sat there trying not to gasp too hard so as to avoid aggravating his injury. The potion hadn't been enough. Rowan still felt cold and frail, could still feel the steady flow of blood pulsing from the gash with every beat of his heart, but it might have slowed it enough for him to make it to the gate. To Anders. If they didn't run across more trouble on the way...

Fenris cupped his cheek, held his gaze. His eyes were round and shining with worry. Wordlessly, gingerly, he pulled Rowan's hand away from his stomach just enough to check his wound, sucking in a quiet, hissing breath through his teeth when he saw the state of it.

"I'm sorry, amatus." Their eyes met once more, and Fenris stroked his thumb over Rowan's cheekbone. The tenderness in his touch left little sparks of warmth in its wake, a small comfort in the face of what was rapidly becoming a dire situation. Fenris sighed. "There's no helping it; we must get you on your feet if we want to make it to that mage before you lose too much blood."

He slipped an arm under Rowan's, snaking it around his back and lifting him to his feet.

"Wait, beloved, if there are still templars about, I'll be too much of a burden. I don't want you to risk yourself for my sake." Rowan paused—breathless, overcome—and when he spoke again, his voice trembled and broke. "Please don't risk yourself." A steadying breath. "Just go. You can still make it, don't worry about me."

"Never," came the fervent reply, growled through gritted teeth. "You should know by now that I would die at your side before I ever left you behind." His tone brooked no argument, and Rowan didn't know if he could summon the strength to try.

Even despite his best efforts, he found himself leaning more and more heavily on Fenris as they stumbled through the streets. His legs grew weaker with each step, breaths shallower, sight blurrier, hand redder. The world spun and tilted around him, stretching out into streaks of color and light, and he even didn't realize he was falling until he felt strong, slender arms around him, lifting him until they were fully carrying him.

here's a prompt for you:

Dorian/m!Inquisitor & i could spend the day just like this, right here with you.

Howdy! Thank you for the prompt!! This actually fit nicely with an idea I've been sitting on for a while now, and it apparently gave me the push I needed to write it! :D

It's set in Kirkwall after the events of Trespasser :)

@dadrunkwriting

"Dorian, come on!" Cain's grin was infectious, even as he very impatiently tugged at Dorian's hand.

"Wait a moment, amatus," he laughed, out of breath from all the running around, then continued, unable to keep the endearment out of his voice. "Didn't Varric say it was this way?"

It was always a treat to see Cain in one of these rare exuberant moods. His lover was given to frequent and severe periods of melancholy, often severe enough to be cause for serious concern. Seeing him smiling like this... it meant a lot to Dorian.

Ah, but how soon it would be over. His stay in Kirkwall was only a temporary visit to help Cain settle into the Hightown manor Varric had gifted him, but he'd be damned if he didn't make the most of every moment they spent together. As such, now was not the time to dwell on endings. He had a hidden roof access staircase to find.

It turned out that they were both wrong about where the damn thing was. The Hanged Man was many things, but well laid-out was not one of them. Giggling breathlessly like a pair of besotted schoolboys, Dorian and Cain clambered up the stairs and out onto the roof of Kirkwall's favorite seedy tavern. It wasn't a particularly tall building, but the view was nothing to sneeze at. The ramshackle buildings of Lowtown sprawled out around them, and the great, starry sky lay outstretched over the entire city like a vaulted ceiling. Countless stars twinkled in the inky darkness, but they were cheap imitations when compared to the stars in Cain's eyes. Yes, Dorian wouldn't be staying with him for anywhere near as long as either of them would like, but in this moment, nothing mattered more than those eyes and the man looking out of them. They settled on the edge of the roof, looked up at the night sky, talked about everything and nothing while Cain was tucked contentedly against Dorian's side; arm around his waist, head propped on his shoulder. A short time after a brief lapse into comfortable silence, Cain spoke up again.

"I think I could spend the entire night just like this, right here with you." Cain's tone was light, but there was a deep earnestness to the words all the same. It stoked some nameless emotion in Dorian, something he wasn't sure how to describe. There was affection, of course. He always felt affection when he was with his amatus. But this? It was yearning, almost. And now he was getting misty eyed? Oh no, this wouldn't do at all.

Unsure what to make of it, he just shook his head and shot Cain a teasing smirk. "All night? That's probably not wise. We'd both end up terribly stiff, and then Varric would have to send those guards of his to come and carry us home. Might work out well for him, come to think of it. He's always trying to give them the slip. Maker forbid they try and keep that dwarf safe."

"You know what I mean, you cretin," Cain huffed, mirth dancing in his gaze as he gave Dorian a playful shove. "Actually, you know what?" He got to his feet with a mock-offended sniff and looked down his nose at Dorian in a way that was almost reminiscent of the over-acted dramatics of an Orlesian play. "If you're just going to tease me, why don't I go back inside and sit with Varric? He's a serious viscount now; he would never make fun of me."

Oh MAN this is a good one. Rowan has such a soft spot for Merrill ouuuhhh I'm cheesing so evilly >:]

@dadrunkwriting & @bigbadtemplarsfest

Content warnings: noncon, asphyxiation, fantasy racism

(And how Anders was involved)

(I also have charts ;P )

I figured it would be helpful to have this as a reference for anyone who wanted to make a more informed prompt choice for them. I'll do my best to keep it short and informative 🫡

They're both very devoted to and protective of each other, and you'll rarely find them apart. Where Rowan goes, Fenris goes, and vice-versa. They're also STUPID soft with each other, and Rowan in particular is almost worshipful when they're alone together, though that doesn't mean Fenris feels less deeply for him; Rowan just can't get enough of making Fenris feel as loved as possible cus he's just. Like That. He finds so much fulfillment taking care of the people he loves. In turn, Fenris makes sure he knows all of his affection is appreciated and shared, and does his best to ensure Rowan doesn't give too much of himself. They would do anything for each other, and they trust each other completely. They're not shy about being affectionate in public, though Rowan typically tries to keep things reasonably toned down. Fenris, on the other hand, has no qualms with making it clear that Rowan is his.

As affectionate and idyllic as their relationship is, no romance is completely devoid of conflict. The main points of contention for them would be their differing opinions on mages, as well as Rowan's proclivity for constantly getting them roped into situations they would not be in were it not for his relentless kindness and willingness to help anyone who might need it. Their arguments are usually limited to a tense conversation or two and are over pretty quickly, as they hate upsetting and being upset with each other.

Now, where Anders fits into all this is in the time following Fenris breaking things off after his and Rowan's first night together. Rowan developed a bit of a drinking problem after Bethany's death, so that's what he turned to in order to cope with what happened between him and Fenris. This will be important later. Now, he and Anders had been harboring feelings for each other since shortly after they met, though Rowan's had begun to dwindle in the face of his growing love for Fenris. They had yet to disappear though, so when Anders kissed him and confessed his feelings within a couple days of Fenris leaving him, Rowan, off-balance from all the emotional turmoil going on, accepted his proposition. His acceptance was both because he didn't want to make Anders feel bad by rejecting him as well as a desperate attempt to see if it was even possible for him to get over Fenris. He regretted it almost immediately, but he brushed his worry aside and decided to wait and see if he felt any better when Anders actually did show up. And then he did. And it wasn't better. It was so, SO much worse. He told Anders he couldn't do it, it was too soon, and he didn't want to lead him on because his heart well and truly belonged to Fenris.

You know that drinking problem I mentioned? It comes into play here. A few days have gone by, and he's feeling downright miserable. Fenris left him, and he feels like it was his fault even though, logically, he knows it was because of Fen's own issues. Anders is hurt by his rejection, and reasonably so, Rowan thinks. He led him on only to realize too late that he couldn't commit. He's also so, so lonely, but he refuses to let anyone see him in this state (said state being horribly upset and drunker than he's let himself get in a long time). The misery and the alcohol are slowly wearing down his self control though, and it gets to a point where all he can think of is how badly he needs to apologize to Anders, so he stumbles down to Darktown and into the clinic. One drunken thing leads to another and they end up hooking up despite Anders knowing full well that it's not going to last. And it does not. They have a few more encounters over the next few months, and each one leaves Rowan feeling worse than the last, more and more convinced that this isn't what he truly wants, until he finally manages to tear himself away for good. They knew the whole time that things were doomed to end badly, but the heart is a strange, illogical thing. Rowan feels so unfathomably guilty about all of this that he manages to cold turkey his way out of his drinking habit for a good while, which negates any chance of something like that ever happening again. This was one of his worst moments, and you better believe he relentlessly beat himself up over it for ages.

Anyway! Charts!

Also! Playlists!

Oooo thank you so much for the prompt! I'm excited for this one >:3

It's set sometime after All That Remains, post-breakup, pre-reconciliation :)

@dadrunkwriting

Hiiii! Thank you for the prompt!! Gonna do Rowan for this one, I think :3

@dadrunkwriting

Class: Dual-dagger rogue; assassin + duelist Birthdate: 24 Cloudreach, 9:06 (24 at the start of DA2) Gender & Orientation: Bisexual cis man Romance: Fenris; had a complicated and temporary entanglement with Anders Personality: Blue, with a smidge of red as needed. Sometimes a little purple, usually around Varric MBTI: ENFJ 2w1 Zodiac: Taurus sun, Virgo moon, Pisces rising Tarot: The Lovers, Strength, Ten of Wands, Five of Cups Mages or Templars? Mages all the way! He had mixed feelings about what Anders did but stood by him to the end. He disapproves of blood magic, but he let Merrill figure out her own path and admired her interest in the history of her people. Left in the Fade? Nope! He's alive and well.

Rowan is measured, calm, and quietly observant. He’s an absolute sweetheart, but that certainly doesn’t mean he’s gullible or easy to walk all over (unless you’re one of his friends or a family member teehee). He’s very steady and put together, and he has soft eyes (very important!!). He tends to look like he knows something you don’t, but is too kind to make it apparent. It’s not intentional or anything, it's just his resting face. He’s a natural caretaker, but he’s not overbearing (most of the time...), just supportive and impressively patient. He’s someone to lean on, no matter what you might be going through.

He’s somehow both approachable and intimidating; most people feel very at ease around him as long as they don’t intend him harm. He clearly comes across as someone patient and kind, and exudes a warm, comforting energy even at first glance, but there’s an air of subtle strength and intelligence to him under the friendliness that marks him as someone you shouldn't mess with. He’s kind but competent, you could say. He’s rarely caught unawares and is constantly on his toes and prepared for trouble in order to keep his friends and family safe. They matter more to him than anything, and he often ignores his own needs in favor of theirs. No matter what, even in the most fraught situations, he always treats them with patience and care, and will protect them to his last breath. 

He’s not one for antagonizing others and is never the first person to hurl insults, always doing his best to handle things calmly and civilly, but he is sharp-witted and clever and clearly won’t tolerate anyone hurting his loved ones, verbally or otherwise. He generally has a very good handle on his emotions, but if something is an affront to his personal sense of justice (i.e. those who wantonly hurt others or target the vulnerable), he tends to be much less diplomatic; especially if the culprit is getting violent. A good way to make him abandon all thought of being civil is to seriously threaten or hurt his loved ones. Attacks on them do NOT go over well with Rowan, and he will lose his composure and restraint if he's worried enough.

He carries so, SO much sorrow and grief (like holy SHIT) mostly due to the fact that he lost every member of his family over the span of a few years, but he tends to neglect himself regardless, because it makes him feel guilty to burden those he loves with his problems. He feels like he should be able to take on everyone’s issues, including his own, and that anything less means he’s not doing enough. He has very high standards for himself; definitely way too high. He’s just a sad, sweet guy who finds all of his fulfillment in protecting and caring for others.

As for his relationships with his party, he gets along best with Fenris, Anders, Varric, Merrill, and Isabela. He and Aveline are close, but their relationship is somewhat contentious at times due to what he sees as her over-reliance on law and order, while she disapproves of his tendency to make decisions based purely on his own morals (as evidenced by his decision that the elves who killed the guard for assaulting their sister were justified). Him and Sebastian have an interesting dynamic to me. Sebastian obliviously thought they were friends up until Rowan spared Anders, but Rowan was deeply put off by him for most of the game and was just being civil because he's nice like that. Their odd dynamic came to be the way it is because Rowan constantly makes decisions Sebastian approves of just by virtue of being a decent person. They disagree deeply on matters related to mages and the Chantry, but most of Seb's approval was gained purely via Rowan being kind to people.

I have this handy character chart of sorts that also gives plenty of insight into his character :D

Also!! Here's some of the art of him I've commissioned cus I'm insane about him!!

And finally, I've got playlists for both him and him + Fenris >:3