hey kids, shake it loose together

Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable

kinda nervous about something. don’t know what it is yet

going to the movies should cost $1.00. bobcorn should be a free treat

they dont tell you this but you carry your upset younger self in you like a parasitic twin

They should invent a glasses that you can lay on your side in bed wearing

I’ve seen you people thirst after men I wouldn’t even feed to my creature

Why did you pull me out of the game, for what reason, what is the charge? Pitching the ball? A succulent meatball right down the middle?

crazy how there are only 2 hours of doing things every day before you keel over and die. if this werent normal id be worried

sources say there are muscles in the back of my neck. and they want to kill me