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🌺Navigation🌺
Hello, lovelies! here’s some help navigating my very, very messy sideblog <3
✨ Fic Recs
✨Main Blog

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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ALL FOR SOMETHING – CH.16
Chapter Sixteen: I'll Just Wait For The Wind To Sweep Away My Words
Summary: An interlude before the Fourth of July shift.
Pairing: Dr. Michael “Robby” Robinavitch x FilipinaNurseFem!Reader
Warnings: 18+ Unrequited Love, Second-Chance, ANGST, Friends-to-Lovers, Slow Burn Romance, She falls first, but He falls harder, Yearning, Delayed Hurt to Comfort, Depression, PTSD, Flashbacks, Medical Inaccuracies, Suicidal Ideation, Anxiety, Age-Gap (Robby is in his 50s, what did you think?), Insecurities, Longing, PittFest Memories, Blood, Needles, Death of a patient/s, Reader has a nickname (Ducky), Gossip, Passive Aggressiveness, Sassy!Robby, Sad!Robby, Dark Humor, Jokes about unaliving (it's unserious, I swear), Medicated!Reader, Hospitals, EMTs, Lots of medical jargon, Miscommunication, Flirting, Jealousy, Teasing, Awkward Flirting, Scratching, Grief, Crying, Reader has Allergies, Noelle Hastings (this is its own warning bruh), Therapy Session,
Word Count: 5.7k
A/N: Before we move on to S2, we’ll have some snippets of their lives in the past 10 months. Cuz I think that’s fun and it adds to the angst lol. Here, have a short chapter filled with some fluffy moments and a lot of angsty ones, tehe. 🤭
Side note: Gif in the moodboard from @/noahwhyle. I’m not a doctor or a nurse. I’m dyslexic, and English isn’t my first language! So I apologize in advance for the spelling and/or grammatical errors. As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are appreciated. Thank you and happy reading!
Songs: Pagtingin by Ben&Ben and pretty isn’t pretty by Olivia Rodrigo
Previous Chapter → Next Chapter | Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist |
3 MONTHS LATER…
HOME — NIGHT
Your apartment is quiet in a way the ED never is.
No alarms.
No overhead pages.
No smell of betadine or iron.
Just the soft hum of your refrigerator and the blue glow of your laptop screen balanced on the edge of your kitchen table.
Neil Stevens adjusts his glasses on the other side of the screen. The lighting in his office back home in the Philippines is warm, yellow. Familiar.
“It’s been a while,” he says gently.
“Yeah.” You tuck one leg beneath you in the chair. “My shifts have been hectic for the past few weeks.”
You say it lightly, but your shoulders are still tense from today’s twelve-hour stretch.
You know you’re lucky. Most residents and nurses in Pittsburgh have months-long waitlists. You found Neil years ago—back when panic attacks first started carving out space in your chest—and you held onto him. Even across oceans. Even through time zones.
“How’s your sleep?” he asks.
You glance toward your bedroom doorway.
“The nightmares come back then and again.”
Not every night, just enough to keep you from trusting sleep.
“Same theme?” he asks.
“Mostly.” You hesitate. “Mass casualty stuff. The morgue. Sometimes the screaming...”
He nods slowly. “Did you notify your psychiatrist?”
“Yes.” You nod. “We adjusted the Diphenhydramine.”
“Any topics you wanna bring up first?” Neil asks.
You stare at your hands. “Not really.”
He waits.
“Wanna start with your wins?” he offers.
Pairing: Frankie Morales x f!reader
Summary: You've always loved Frankie's hands. Even more now that you're married.
Word count: 750 words
Warnings: +18 MDNI, established relationship, fluff, some really not descriptive adult situations
A/N: This came to me this morning as I was walking the dog and contemplating that I have lots of ideas about Frankie and Miss as parents with their kids but not enough about them as a couple. So here we are. I'm not a native speaker, this is unbeta'd, please consider reblogging if you enjoy the story.
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still here
pairing: joel miller x fem!reader
description: joel is older than y/n, but that’s never been a concern of hers until very recently.
warnings: UNEDITED, age gap (legal), swearing, mentions of sex, mentions of ageing, mentions of health issues, mentions of insecurities, angsty, i literally stole the final line from tlou s1e3
words: 2.3K
date posted: 29/03/23
(idk how i feel about this yet, the idea just popped into my head and i wrote it in about an hour and a half so don’t be too mad if its not great!)
Fifty-eight was not old. Y/n had been reassuring Joel of that since they had started dating. Maybe he was older than her, but that had very little to do with the way that she felt about him.
His age was among his biggest insecurities. He was a man who had lived through and was hardened by the apocalypse, while she was just a child when it happened, and was able to deal with the trauma of the world ending much better due to the fact that she simply couldn’t remember any part of her life from before. The apocalypse had taken a great toll on him, both emotionally and physically.
Hi can you do anything that’s pre-outbreak of Joel and reader anniversary. It can be smut but the beginning can be Joel and Sarah planning the anniversary! I love their relationship so much
Happy Anniversary?
pairing – pre-outbreak!joel x reader
word count – 11.6k (this was supposed to be short and sweet... what happened...)
warnings – slight injuries, hospital scene but nothing major, cute smut (18+)
a/n – some more cute domestic joel stuff 🥺 with some smut hehe 😬 thank you for the request <3 I hope you like what I made with it ˙ᵕ˙ also just want to quickly take the time and thank you guys for all the love on my previous joel work, you actually made my app crash 😅🤭
After Sarah had finished her homework at the Adler's place, she ran home and hopped onto the couch to enjoy some child-friendly TV - being stuck in a house with only people over sixty wasn't really her favourite way of spending her free time.
It didn't surprise her when her dad wasn't home at six. It also didn't surprise her when he wasn't there yet at seven. Around eight in the afternoon though, she started to wonder. The only way she could reach him was the landline, so she leaned over the armrest of the sofa to get a hold of the phone before dialling the number her father had made her know by heart back in kindergarten. It didn't even ring. The robot's voice immediately let her know that he was unavailable. With scrunched eyebrows and her lips pressed together in a tight line, she leaned back into the cushions.
There was one other person that would probably know where he was. You. Another number Joel had asked her to learn once he had noticed that things were getting serious between the two of you. The girl didn't need to wait for long before the familiar tone of your voice rang through her eyes.
"Hello?" Of course, you had the number of Joel's landline saved in your phone, but you didn't know who of the Miller household was calling.
"Hi, Y/N!"
"Oh, Sarah, hey! How are you?"

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She’s A Gun
Pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader
Author’s note: *John Mulaney voice* My wife is a bitch and I love her SO much (gif by @salome-c) I also didn’t know how to end this so sorry
Summary: Somebody didn’t give the new guy a heads up about talking about Joel Miller’s family [1.6k]
Warnings: idiots in love, a quick mention of a queer slur, I can’t think of anything else!!
You catch him looking at you across the room as you sip some new whiskey Tommy traded for. He looks young and fresh-faced without many scars or littering the surface of his skin. His eyes are bright when they meet yours, and you give him a polite smile before returning to your drink. Unsurprisingly, he bellies up to the bar a few minutes later. You glance at the door, and the man follows your gaze.
“You meeting someone?” He asks. The bartender, a kind man named Nick, flashes you a look, but you wave him off, turning to the younger man, who is dead set on making his presence known.
“You must be new.” You say, and he laughs as he holds out his hand.
“You got me. I’m Luke,” He says. You meet him halfway and shake his hand, giving him your name. “Where are you from?”
Keep reading
Just Flowers
Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader (Ft. Best Friend Tess)
Word Count: 1.75k
Genre: Angst, with a bit of fluff
Warnings: Arguments, Joel being Joel, slight reference to an age gap, but it’s got fluff, not proofread
A/N: Happy Valentines Day! Here’s my first Joel Fic, I’m not all that content with it, the idea I had in my head didn’t really its way onto the page but I felt I should post it anyways.
Summary: It’s Valentines Day and you just wanted to do something nice for Joel.
Keep reading
Just Flowers
Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader (Ft. Best Friend Tess)
Word Count: 1.75k
Genre: Angst, with a bit of fluff
Warnings: Arguments, Joel being Joel, slight reference to an age gap, but it’s got fluff, not proofread
A/N: Happy Valentines Day! Here’s my first Joel Fic, I’m not all that content with it, the idea I had in my head didn’t really its way onto the page but I felt I should post it anyways.
Summary: It’s Valentines Day and you just wanted to do something nice for Joel.
Keep reading
No Time To Die
TAGS AND WARNINGS - +18, Minors DNI, no explicit smut but sexual themes, whump, a lot of angst, blood, graphic wounds and procedures (?) probably not medically accurate, could be almost gore if you squint, hurt/comfort, two dorks in love, canon-typical violence, near-death experiences. Not based on the game, I don’t know anything about the game and I don’t want spoilers please.
PAIRINGS - Joel Miller x fem!reader
WORD COUNT - 9.6k.
SUMMARY - The main difficulty of being Joel’s closest friend is not falling in love with him, but you still do. Those feelings are buried until you join him on a mission to trade supplies with Bill and Frank. With your life now hanging by a thread, Joel is determined to get you to safety, but the clock is ticking faster than he can run.
A/N - I honestly don’t know what this is. I tried to look for angsty and whumpy fics and couldn’t find any that hit the spot just right; so I wrote my own. This story is set in some time between 2010 and 2020, or so. Bill and Frank are still very much alive. The only warning apart the amount of blood in this, it’s my own knowledge of the English language.
’Breathe’
With a shiver, you try to comply with your own command. The action itself confuses you, and you don’t know where exactly in your mind that thought came from; or why. All you know is that a moment ago you were nothing, absolutely nothing, not even human. You forgot your own existence in a still ocean made of black thick ink. The ink is now backtracking, though, but the remnants of it stay in your foggy mind, clouding it as your consciousness comes back in waves.
Waking up from a dream is easy, you just come back into yourself from a nice trip to your own imagination. Regaining consciousness, however, is a little more difficult. Instead of going somewhere, you go inwards into yourself. Your overworked mind, already tired and busy with keeping you alive, doesn’t care much about bringing you to any other place so you can die peacefully. No. And the awakening is not as it should be either.
Keep reading
reunited || joel miller
a/n: kegerg nonnie, i loved this. i'll be over here crying 😭
warnings: angst, pre-outbreak, post-outbreak, fluffy ending, ellie making joel open up about his past in relation to you, mentions of taking pills and drinking
pairing: joel miller x female!reader
w/c: 2.3k Joel Miller masterlist || My Library
“Come here, mama,” Joel’s voice, deep and raspy in your ear, entraps your mind with flurries of heat as he wraps his arms around you.
“You better be careful throwing that word around, Joel,” You tease, intertwining your legs with his. Sarah was staying with a friend this weekend, which left the house open to you and Joel for the weekend.
“Really? What is that supposed to mean?” Joel chuckles, kissing a line down the soft column of your neck, rugged hands encircling your hips as he repositions you on top of him.
You and Joel Miller weren’t together. Tommy insisted that you two were in some sort of love-sick mind game where you pinned for the other with softened looks and patronizing gazes, but you two thought of yourselves more as friends with… benefits.

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Say You Love Me (Joel Miller x f! reader)
1K Celebration | Masterlist
Pairing: Joel Miller x f! Reader (pre and post outbreak)
Rating: M (18+, explicit smut)
Word Count: 6.2K
Summary: Red wine. Rage. Regret. Reunions. When pride separates you from the man that got away in 2003, you thought you’d never see him again. But when going to tie loose ends for Bill and Frank, you see him and a young companion.
Content: TLOU spoilers, slight changes to the story, age gap (~10-15 years), multiple sex scenes, dirty talk, unprotected p in v sex, fingering, cowgirl, creampie, oral (f), rough sex, alcohol consumption, grief, violence, mentions of death, the musical stylings of Fleetwood Mac
A/N: Happy TLOU day! This initially started out as a creation for my 1K celebration to "Maroon" by Taylor Swift, but as you can see it completely manifested into its own short story. Thanks to everyone for being patient for my writing. I hope y'all enjoy!
Every time you have a dream about everything before, you try to document it down in your ratty journal with your pen running on empty. Everything seems to run on empty.
You dream of your former life less and less as the years go by. It’s a hazy memory and you can’t remember how we were able to live on such luxuries and be comfortable and be happy.
You dream of the man with his large hands and warm smile on your living room floor, warm with wine.
Red lips. Red cheeks. Red wine.
The bitter taste of cheap red blends on his tongue.
Sticky Austin nights where you’d start outside in the thick humidity but end it in ice cold a/c. It never mattered anyway, Joel always ran hot like a furnace so you’d have to settle yourself in between thin sheets.
Sleeping Bag (Joel Miller x Reader)
Word count: 1.7K
Summary: you can’t get comfortable in your sleeping bag, so joel invites you into his
Tags: age gap (mostly implied), anxiety, fluff, protective/caring!joel, comfort, cuddling, sharing a sleeping bag (instead of the one bed trope lol), kissing (forehead and lips), it’s just cute short and fun
A/N: simple and quick, inspired by ep 4 when joel and ellie were in sleeping bags in the woods, but no explicit spoilers. I’ve been wanting to write for joel since episode one and finally got an idea. pretty sure more will be coming soon…
Cross-posted to ao3
After sleeping in a bed in the QZ’s for years, suddenly trying to get comfortable in a sleeping bag on the ground was proving difficult for you.
What a spoiled thought to have, right? Well, it wasn’t just that. You were out in the open woods. There could be infected anywhere. They could come for you any second. How could you close your eyes and rest peacefully knowing you were no longer behind the barrier walls?
Ellie was already asleep, you could hear her light snores. Your back was facing him, but assumed Joel was asleep as well given his stillness. You rolled from your side to your back and sighed.
𝙍𝙚𝙟𝙚𝙘𝙩 𝙞𝙩, 𝙄 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙞𝙩 - 𝙅𝙤𝙚𝙡 𝙈𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙧 𝙭 𝙁𝙚𝙢!𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 (1/?)
𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮• 𝙄𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙤𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙣𝙚𝙬 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙅𝙤𝙚𝙡 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙚, 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙖 𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙮. 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙥 𝙞𝙩, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙅𝙤𝙚𝙡 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙨 𝙞𝙩 𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙘𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙗𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣, (𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙨 𝙞𝙩 𝙘𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙨𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙮). 𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨• 𝘼𝙂𝙀 𝙂𝘼𝙋 (𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙡𝙮-𝙢𝙞𝙙 20'𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙅𝙤𝙚𝙡, 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙡, 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬...), 𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙙 𝙨𝙢𝙪𝙩 18+, 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙜𝙣𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙮 𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝘼𝙉𝙂𝙎𝙏, 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙨 𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙝𝙪𝙧𝙩, 𝙚𝙙𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙𝙨 𝙙𝙖𝙧𝙠 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙚𝙣𝙙, 𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝, 𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙙, 𝙤𝙝 𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙝... 𝙥𝙖𝙣𝙞𝙘 𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙖𝙘𝙠, 𝙞 𝙬𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙨𝙪𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙗𝙚 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙨𝙪𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚, 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙖 𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙅𝙤𝙚𝙡 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙚 𝙗𝙮𝙚, 𝙖𝙣𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙘 & 𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙝𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙘 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 (𝙄 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙄'𝙢 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙄 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙩𝙝 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨), 𝙞𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙧 𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙤𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙪𝙚 𝙗𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙨 𝙝𝙪𝙧𝙩. 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣... 𝘼𝙉𝙂𝙎𝙏. (𝙏𝙃𝙄𝙎 𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨, 𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙙 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙝!𝙩, 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 𝙛𝙤𝙡𝙡𝙤𝙬 𝙢𝙮 𝙎𝙐𝙋𝙀𝙍 𝙨𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩). 𝘼𝙄𝙉• 𝙙𝙖𝙢𝙣 𝙗𝙞𝙩𝙘𝙝, 𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙩. 𝙄 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙡 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙋𝙚𝙙𝙧𝙤 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙞𝙣 𝙅𝙖𝙣𝙪𝙖𝙧𝙮 𝙤𝙛 2021 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣 17, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙄'𝙢 𝙩𝙬𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙝𝙞𝙢, 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 1 𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙝 1/2 𝙖𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣 19. 1 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙋𝙚𝙙𝙧𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙖 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙤𝙧, 𝙄 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙛𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙙 18, 𝙨𝙤 𝙣𝙤𝙬... 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙥 𝙢𝙚. (𝘼 𝙡𝙤𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙡𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙨3 𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙨 𝙤𝙢𝙜) 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙬𝙝𝙮 𝙄'𝙢 𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙡𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙛𝙛, 𝙗𝙚 𝙡'𝙢 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙝𝙞𝙢 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙋𝙚𝙙𝙧𝙤 𝙜𝙤𝙙. 𝙉𝙊 𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙊𝙁𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿 𝙎𝙊𝙍𝙍𝙔
PART 2
✰ 𝙄𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙓 (𝙈𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚)
♪ ♫ 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙨𝙩 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙋𝙚𝙙𝙧𝙤 𝙃𝙀𝙍𝙀
As the sun starts peeking through the dusty curtain in the room, you open your eyes. It’s too early, the sunlight looking more reddish rather than yellow. He’s behind you, arms protectively holding your stomach. You can feel him inside you, because he’s still there. It was extremely risky being in that position on a day like that, staying in an abandoned hotel to rest the day before. With a teenager on the couch of the living room and the probability of needing to get away running from there, however, Joel and you decide to not worry about that and have a passionate night.
“Hey…” his raspy voice startles you. You woke him up when you started squirming, trying to stretch yourself and make your bones crack a little. “Morning, handsome”
“Not old man anymore, huh?” your giggles make him smile. It was almost impossible to make Joel smile when you met him a year and a half ago. Not that you tried to do so, but he never smiled. And now, you were able to make his muscles form a smile almost every day. “Nah, you demonstrated and proved me wrong very well last night.”
“I had a good night somehow. But I have to say you were very reckless, you had to wake me up to keep a watch” there’s your old man again. Sometimes, moments like that reminded you of the big age gap between you two. “I know…, sorry. I fell asleep before I could even think about it. Sorry again…”
“It’s not okay, but okay, darlin’…” he doesn’t like when you do things like that; forgetting about something important, and changing plans at the last minute, among other things. But he hates scolding you. He knows you’re a woman, who can take of herself. Yet, he was extremely protective of you. Especially after the state you were in when he met you.
“We need to keep searching the whole building before the evening. Let’s start moving on…” you were right. But all Joel can focus on is your small naked back facing him. You giggle again, looking at something with your face down. “What?…”
“It’s all leaking out…” he knows what you mean, but he can’t blush anymore, because it’s not something to be blushed about. “Can I tell you something?”
“Uh-huh…” you turn to see him blinking a couple of times, before seating in the bed to stretch too. Even though he is a grown man, work and the “missions” he always ended up in, made him a little muscular, and you always complimented that on him, no matter how often he would state he was old and tired. “I…, I-uh, I’ve come to accept that… I want to have a baby”
“What?” the tone of his voice sounds very confused, even hostile. Immediately you got nervous and anxious as usual. It was a dangerous subject, he had a lot of traumas related to that, and so you did. But you thought you could move on and start a new family, you believed in possibilities. “I know it’s sudden. I just, if everything goes right, we could have a life again.”
“To get to that, there’s a lot to come. It could take some years or decades. And you know it…” as you put on your underwear, you can’t help but sigh. “Ellie could be the solution. We could build a home, harvest, and settle down, Joel. We can’t live our lives in misery for our pasts”
“And how do you plan that? because you are suggesting making it real now. So what? you get pregnant, and we continue the journey to deliver the girl until you get insanely huge and we can’t keep going. What if you end up delivering on the road? What if you get sick? What if you get infected? I think we have enough for now” the way he spits the words, it makes it sound so wrong. Like all you ever wanted since you were left alone was stupid, even disgusting. “You make it sound like it’s repulsive”
“It is repulsive to be thinking about having a kid these days” after all you were a mature adult who understood. It was insane, but not repulsive, though. He had his right to avoid the subject, but he didn’t have to be so harsh about it. “Even in the future. What the fuck is going to be a life for a kid in a shit like it is and will be this world?”
“Why you can’t let yourself be happy? You don’t even try it and you already make me happy enough to think about a safe future. Is it because of your daughter?” he points at you, looking at your figure now fully clothed in cargo pants and long sleeve top. “Don’t…”
“Yes, I do. You suffered, I know, you had to be in the outbreak day and suffered. But I also suffered, I grew up in this disaster with a family. I had everything!” some tears swell in your eyes, but you force yourself to keep whispering, backing up the tears. Hoping you don’t wake the girl outside the room yet. “You lost your family twenty years ago. I lost mine sixteen months ago. I thought we could survive this together…” he shuts his eyes, blocking the memory of the day he lost his Sarah. He accepts he’s being mean, but you hit the wrong one of his nerves. “You could stop being a depressed old man and be happy again”
“And you could stop being a delusional child who dreams of things that can’t happen! Just accept this is your life, y/n.” you glance directly at him, rage invades your chest, and you just want to leave him alone. “There’s nothing you can do to change our pasts. We’re not even together, we have cargo to deliver. So no, I won’t have kids with you!”
The world stops, and your heartbeats decrease. Suddenly you find yourself scared to have an anemic breakdown and faint because of it. But when the pitch in your ears stops, a ringing replaces it, securing your health for the moment. “Y/n…”
“No, just forget about this. Forget everything” when you remark everything, you try to tell him that you won’t sleep with him again, you won’t try to cherish him, you’re just on the same path for Ellie and the reward. Not for some emotional connection, or because you were in love with him.
Joel looks hesitant at you, but just as your eyes collide with him, he turns away from you, sliding into his underwear and dressing. You hear Ellie moving around, and you worry, so you get out of the room. That’s when you see the girl looking through the window, so you can slam the door of the bedroom, confirming how angry you were.
“Are you ready?” the girl nods turning to you. You can’t tell if she heard you and Joel, but if she did, she was very good at pretending. “Where the fuck is my backpack?”
“Under the blanket. I put it there” you spot the gray blanket, there was your backpack. You were too tired to drag it inside the room the night before. “Thanks”
“I wish I could give you something to eat. We’ll find something on the way, m‘kay?” Ellie nods again. She feels more comfortable with you, not that she hated Joel, but the man was extremely closed-minded and a little bitter to her. “It’s okay. You feed us really well yesterday”
“Hope we can find the goddamit supplies and leave as soon as possible” Joel came out of the room, with his face serious and piercing as usual. He barely glanced at Ellie before landing his eyes on you, while you were putting your jacket and backpack on. You won’t give him a single look, not when you’re mad and hurt. For the moment, you didn’t even want to exist. You felt like you were taking time, a lot of time. If the three of you were in that abandoned hotel, was for you. Because you needed your inhalators and iron supplies.
“We have to get going…” was the only thing Joel said. Ellie waited at the door and you ignored him as you exited the room. With a gun and flashlight in both hands, you start leading the way.
“Where is the lounge aisle?” Ellie asked when you reached the end of the hallway. Before you could open the wide door that would lead to the stairs, Joel stopped you, putting his whole arm over your chest, obstructing your hands in the way. “It’s not safe…”
“The lounge must be at the top. Or close to it” you preferred to answer the girl instead of looking at Joel. Something was itching on your calf, but in the kind of days you lived in, you didn’t have time to check and scratch, you had to keep going.
“We’re on the fifth floor. The lounge is on the…twelve” announced Joel coming back from the stairs. “It’s dangerous, we would make a lot of noise. I’ll go, you two stay in the room”
“What? No, we can’t split, no, I refuse” Ellie protested, silently, you agreed with her. “This is not a decision for you to make”
“Listen, bitter old man, you agree-…” before the girl can’t go on, you shush her. “Enough. It’s all of us or nothing”
Joel didn’t want to keep arguing with you, even less with Ellie being present. He regretted most of the things he said to you. In the end, you were right, he made his own life miserable for the terrors of his past. He had the opportunity to change that now, and he was rejecting it.
The way upstairs is quiet, even uncomfortable. You can feel Joel’s eyes on you, always trying to protect you. Opening the doors to check for any danger before you can, turning back to see if you’re not having an asthma attack, or close to fainting. And you can’t hate him, but you were truly hurt.
“It’s here” you whisper, pointing at the elegant sign of Lounge in front of you. It must have been a luxurious hotel, and it made you sad to see it frozen in time. Carefully, you open the door with the gun in your other hand. Ready to fight whatever is waiting for you on the other side, but it’s empty. “And it’s clear…”
Rumors said that the oldest hotel in downtown was left in 2017 with medicines, vitamins, and more as a container for FEDRA. Because the quarantine zone was too eager and desperate, and it would have been chaos for everyone if the supplies were there. Joel was too kind to make some deals and bribes until he knew that it wasn’t in custody, five soldiers going there once in a month, but that was it.
“Why are we here?” Ellie asked looking expectantly. You sighed, knowing that Joel was looking at you, he knew the answer but he wouldn’t tell Ellie. “I need some medicines….”
“Why? You don’t look sick” again, you sighed. There were boxes with letters and colors, it was freezing inside the room, but at least they keep the correct temperature.
“I have asthma. And anemia…” you hated when people looked at you with pity. It wasn’t like you were dying, you weren’t infected. You would survive as long as you could because you couldn’t eat decently to regain iron naturally, and asthma would always fuck your lungs, forever.
“I went to school but…” the girl said looking at Joel before he could send a snarky comment to her. “Anemia isn’t like your blood is fucked up and you’re at the verge of dying?”
“Sorta, it means that I don’t have enough red cells in my blood, so I don’t have enough oxygen flowing through my organism” relief floods you when you find a big binder in a creaky table near a window. It’s a big index that indicates what color and numbers are for every box in the room. “I need iron and inhalators. You said it, I don’t look sick”
“But you are…” Joel said behind you. Ellie could feel the tension when you didn’t answer, you don’t even turn around, you keep looking at the binder. Scanning the list, you see the orange section. E-075 to F-004 vitamins, supplies, and minerals. “Gotcha”
“What?” thankfully Ellie asked, getting closer to you. You were too proud and stubborn to ask Joel to help you find the damn medicines.
“It’s in the orange boxes…” something in the back of your head was telling you to see what was itching in your calf. It felt like a needle dangling and gently scratching your skin with some movements. Everyone started to look in the orange boxes. And by the second box you opened, detached cooler air hit your face, and finally, iron sucrose injections were everywhere. No more ups and down on your heartbeats, fainting, or headache, at least for now.
“Injections… wouldn’t be better to get pills?” Ellie was fun to have around. A week and a half were enough to like her. “Pills would take me months to recover, I don’t have months”
“Yeah, and it’s not like that old man it’s the most gentle. He was a dick in the morning…”
“What?” you whispered like her but in panic. Grabbing tons of the injections and putting them in your backpack she holds the box open for you. “I heard you two. Thankfully I was asleep to hear you had fun last night. But I wasn’t very lucky in the morning….”
“I’m not discussing this with you, missy” she shrugged but helped you. “I just think that you’re not crazy for dreaming with a family”
“Not crazy, just traumatized” without thinking clearly, you grab some tablets of vitamins, just in case. You can hear Joel opening more boxes, he can’t hear your conversation for sure, but he can tell you two are whispering. “What happened to your family?”
“Uh…In the quarantine zone, we were the only remaining family. All of us survived, from my grandparents to my uncles. My grandma and I worked in the little clinic as nurses. But, Uhm… I guess life’s a bitch. They all got infected somehow and… I, I-…I had to end things by myself” Ellie gets quiet. Joel told her that he had to kill a lot of infected people before but… she never heard of someone having to kill their own family. “Sorry…”
“That’s why you ended up with him?” she means if that’s how you met Joel, so you nod. “I ended up being his neighbor, and… he took me because I was… super sick. That’s when the anemia got worse, I remember I couldn’t even talk” Ellie appreciated that you had the ovaries to tell her more of you. In the beginning, she found it weird that Joel was very close to you, and she was grossed out when she found you kissing him. But as the days kept going, she got used to it, finding very shocking how sweet the old man was to you. And now with this…
“I thought… he loved me,” you said to yourself, but Ellie heard. Some sadness came when a specific iron supplement box came in your hand. It was for pregnant women.
I thought he loved me. It was just a comment back in the morning. You weren’t begging Joel to get you pregnant, you just wanted him to cheer you up, and sprinkle some hope on your broken dream of a family. He didn’t want to have more kids, especially because of you. After all this time he only saw you like an immature teen who was still in shock. He didn’t love you, he just got used to your company. That’s why he got you in his bed, why he cared for you, it wasn’t love? No, it wasn’t. This life is shit, and maybe he’s right, you should stop living in a fantasy that will never become real. Just deliver Ellie and then live a life in an isolated house, alone, just like you will die. And that fucking itch!… oh. No, no, no, no. This isn’t happening, yesterday when some clickers attacked us, I pushed its head back up, but he didn’t bite me. Joel grabbed me and killed that thing before he could bite me. But that’s why I’ve been feeling this itch, I’m infected. This is how I die…
“Y/n… Are you okay?” you burst out of your inner soliloquy, if that even existed. “You’re scaring me, y/n”
“I’m infected. Ellie…” you ran outside of the room before she can say anything. The contrast between the cold air inside and the dry weather hits you, making you feel twice as sick. You start hearing that disgusting pitch in your ears, and tears form in your eyes because you know what’s coming.
“Hey, no!, ¡y/n, wait!” at Ellie’s scream, Joel came hurriedly, with his backpack in hand. “What happened?, Where’s y/n?” Ellie is frozen. She found it very scary how you acted, she didn’t know how to deal with a person having a panic attack. “Ellie! Where’s y/n?”
“She was frozen, like in shock. Then she-, she, she said she was infected and run outside” Joel cursed, also entering in panic. It was the first time he called her for her name, and none of them noticed it. “Shit!…” as he started running outside and didn’t find you there, a memory crashed him, instantly giving him a headache.
On a rainy night, Joel finished feeding you. Improvement on you was notorious, but you were still very damaged. Everything was quiet, just the rain drops tapping on his window, until you spoke.
“If I ever get infected, I’ll run into the closest building and get to the rooftop. So I will wait until I get fully infected, and then I’ll jump. Nobody has to kill me, it’ll be an accident. But only if I don’t jump by myself fully conscious…”
Ellie doesn’t understand anything. She’s only following Joel upstairs. She feels scared. It was different when you see someone you care about in trance, a scary trance. Because Ellie cares for you. You clapped her imprudent jokes, you talked with her, and you weren’t afraid of sharing topics that could be embarrassing for Joel. You were amazing. And it scared her to see you like that, she feared losing you.
Just as Joel did, but twice. He couldn’t care about his back or tired knees, he just needed to run faster to get you and stop you from doing something stupid. The guilt was eating him alive. Something had startled you because what Ellie described to him was a panic attack. He only saw you having one since he met you, and it wasn’t pleasant.
Heavily scared, Joel opened the door that would lead them to the rooftop. And just as he stepped outside, he saw you. Looking at the ground, lost. Extremely pale and trembling. A panic attack and your blood pressure decreasing at the same time is one of the worst things that could happen.
“Darlin’, stop walking towards the edge…” you could hear a distant voice, probably Ellie or Joel. You feared a lot in your life, but the anxiety and sickness were killing you. You would not happily die if you got infected Joel last night. And if he was watching you on the verge of it, it would end up destroying you. “Yer fine! It’s okay, y/n!”
That awful feeling. It was useless fighting against your body, you would faint at any moment, nausea and tears soaking your face, the heartache of what Joel said to you, the memory of your family crawling and killing each other. You weren’t ready to die.
“What are you doing?” Joel stopped Ellie when she tried to get you. “She’s gonna end up falling, let me go!”
“Stay back” he slowly walked towards you. His instincts activated when you closed your eyes, giving up. He sunk to his knees as he grabbed your unconscious body, moving your hair away from your face, and holding the tears forming in his eyes.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…” he whispered as he hugged your head, pulling you onto his chest. “Forgive me…”
Ellie walked cautiously towards you two. She could tell how bad you were feeling, even unconscious. When she saw Joel at the verge of crying, Ellie got surprised. Maybe Joel loved you too, he was a broken man after all. But she was focused on your leg. Because she remembered watching you crawling backward to stop a stalker to jump on you, and if you were really infected, she had to see.
“She’s like me…” Joel looked at the girl distressed. Ellie pulled a big splinter from your pants, but when Joel looked at your skin, he gasped in surprise. You were bitten, but the wound was clean, completely healed.
_____________________________________
idk, part 2? No, reader is not dead.
“Ain’t nothin’ gonna hurt you, darlin’….” (part 5)
Pairing: Joel Miller x wife!reader
SERIES MASTERLIST
Synopsis: no one mourns the wicked.
A/N:yippie I’m on a roll! This is gonna be the last update this week until the next episode comes out! Get hyped ig 👩🏻❤️💋👩🏻 again, thank you so so much for all the support you’re showing for this series, I’m so so thankful! Please feel free to send in requests so we’re not just sitting here waiting for the next episode 😭 also watching Tess and that infected make out was so gross I can’t
Warnings: violence, percieved cheating , feminine rage, mentions of a lost child, gore, cursing. Smut in future chapters
“Ain’t nothin’ gonna harm you, darlin’….” MASTERLIST
[Part one] -HAPPY BIRTHDAY- You, Joel and Sarah just want to have a birthday party for your husband, but unfortunately, luck isn’t on your side.
[Part two] - CONTAMINATED ZONE DO NOT ENTER- twenty years later, and you and Joel are working your ass off. Problem is his business partner is problematic
[Part 3] -FLIES ARE BETTER CAUGHT WITH HONEY- you and the group take off to get Ellie to the state building. You learn more about her and you and Ellie actually get really close
[Part 4] -“PASS.”- you find your way thru the hotel and into a museum. Ellie and Joel seem to be warming up to eachother. If not begrudgingly
[Part 5] - NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED - making your way through the museum, Ellie learns what a clicker is. Tess gets intimately acquainted as well.
[Part 6] - AIRPLANES - you and Joel finally make up, learning to move past what had happened and care for eachother again, but things aren’t back to normal just yet, your ghosts still haunt you
[Part 7] - TO WHOMEVER… BUT PROBABLY JOEL -you find your way to Bill and Franks, and You and Joel come up with a plan. You’re going home.
[Part 8] - THREE TAPS - you, Joel and Ellie make your way to Wyoming, and you find Joel and Ellie are seeming to slowly to warm up to eachother
TO BE CONTINUED….
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Relative Dating Masterlist
Pairing: Indiana Jones x Reader
Rating: M but will likely have explicit bonus chapters
Notes: Welcome to the latest slow-burn garbage fire. Thank you for joining me. This fic will switch between Reader and Indiana’s points of view. I personally think it’s clear, but if it’s not, please tell me!!
Summary: Dr. Jones’ order of Stay after class is still ringing in your ears as you slowly begin to gather your things. You try to brush off the glares of the other women in the class, finding their attention at once inquisitive and accusatory.
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six
Part Seven
Part Eight
Part Nine
Part Ten
Part Eleven
Part Twelve
Part Thirteen
Part Fourteen
Part Fifteen
Part Sixteen
Part Seventeen
Part Eighteen
Part Nineteen
Part Twenty
Part Twenty One
Part Twenty Two
Part Twenty Three
Part Twenty Four
Part Twenty Five
Period-related outfit reader moodboards
Explicit Bonus Chapter Masterlist
Mutual Friends
PAIRING: Frank Castle x Reader
WORD COUNT: 2.1k
A/N: finally finished this fic that I started probably two months ago, ya proud of me? enjoy the handsome man that is frank castle, and let me know how you like it! reblogs and comments are always appreciated <3
Frank doesn’t make friends.
Karen wants him to, which is the only reason why he agreed to it in the first place. She cares, he knows that. But making a friend won’t fix him the way she thinks it will.
But he also knows if he didn’t he wouldn’t have met her.