AprilFlowers

Ya'll couldn't even handle HER.

(these are part of an unfinished essay of me hyper analyzing Transfem Jax btw and I was using he/him for Jax since it wasn’t confirmed when I wrote this)

the first panel:

Ok so we know Jax did NOT respond well to the dress, and I know you might think that this is like opposite evidence like “oh if Jax were a trans girl he would’ve liked the dress”. And yeah this may seem like an anti-argument at first but really if you are in denial about being trans, you can often slip into toxic masculinity / femininity. I mean I used to have I LOT of toxic femininity, mainly in 8th grade (which it right before I realized I was transmasc), I thought I looked hideous without makeup, I hated the idea of wearing suits, etc. This is a common feeling that trans people in eggs feel (yes, cis people can also feel this too and trans people sometimes don’t, but it’s still a common trait that is usually exaggerated in their case (and idk about you but Jax’s reaction was VERY exaggerated). And it seems like Jax is more embarrassed if anything, which, like I said, is a common trans trait when wearing clothing.

Second panel: (I was yapping about how I felt like Jax’s body and room had a fuck ton of symbolism)

And we also know about Jax’s room, it’s literally the definition of girly. Yet Jax’s body is masculine and clear male coded. The only thing the cast sees is Jax’s body, he purposely hides his room from them, he literally creaks his door jus enough so that only his head is through. He doesn’t want him to know what his room looks like because he is embarrassed about it. Compare this to how Jax masks (I know this is an autistic term but idk how else to describe it) a lot of himself. He puts on a mask and hides who he truly is. He is scared to let people know who he is so he pushes them away. I feel like his room and how he hide it from others is a reflection of how he hides who he truly is. I figured this for a while but then I realized “wait, but his room is really girly, so that might mean that if his room is a reflection of who he really is, that might mean that Jax on the inside is also girly” 

it’s really sloppy and unfinished but I wanted to share with yall