get compressed, bitches

ok you know what mommy’s sick and tired of your poor reading comprehension

"it would be so good if it was good" will haunt you but "it's extremely good, except for the one or two parts which are so bad it's genuinely kind of insulting" will straight up drive you insane

this fetish stuff is getting out of hand what the fuck is word play

going to the slapstick factory and all the workers are breaking the levers to the machines so everything moves uncontrollably fast

you have to be careful reading too many things that are good/smart/well-written bc then you encounter something that isnt and you get confused like ? why didnt they just make this good ? were they stupid

vocaliod drama doesn't even feel real to me half the time like wtf is "teto miku slop"?? slop is something over produced and low quality not a bunch of artist choosing to use those two specific voice banks. before that people mostly just used miku, would all that be mikuslop??

its dj erectile disfunction on the beat

making sure yall go hard even though i cant

bitches love me cuz im a polite young man

my new poker strat: start tearing up after looking at my cards no matter what i got

Everyone say thank you sanitation workers we owe you our lives sanitation workers

if i had a dick i would love to have a disappointing orgasm in the shower while thinking of something or someone that i felt i should not be thinking about & then stand under the water with my forehead against a wall watching the proof of my guilt & shame go down the drain

The insight I get into the female mind thanks to this website is amazing.

not a female 👍

this is the kind of comradeship we need to start the month off on.

Watching Columbo for the first time and I have absolutely instantly imprinted upon this rumpled affable little weirdo like a baby duckling. I'm barely two episodes in and he's doing astrology bits. He just walked into a wardrobe. The first thing he does in the whole show is go on a weird little ramble about heat-reactive elevator buttons (??) and the second thing he does is make an omelette for a grieving widow. His entire deal really is just wandering around being charming and absentminded and letting rich assholes underestimate him until he can turn it round on them right as they start to gloat. Points at one of the most well known and recognisable fictional detectives of all time has anyone here met Columbo my friend Columbo

Holdin him up like a wet alley cat by the scruff of the trench coat like hey boys get me another ten thousand of these

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

Reblog if you're transmasc, support trans men, or want a chocolate chip cookie

love when a mother asks if they have ever done anything to hurt you. ma'am, you will literally never be ready to have this conversation

what therapy do you think we can afford. what truths do you think you can survive

everyone clearly has a super normal relationship with their mother