A Curse from the Deep

The tortoise and the hare have worked out their differences and are now sharing an apartment

Rivals to lovers combination slowburn/speedrun

'flat chested boob job' is always especially funny because boob jobs in the first place are logistical nightmares.

it must be understood that a boob job is first and foremost hot because it implies that both parties were so aroused by this frankly terrible porn idea that they actually did it.

i think if i were a jedi i would make it my life mission to make yoda angry. i would give anything to hear his little goblin voice mutter the words “thin fucking ice, you are on” and click his little cane on the ground. i would do anything. kick him as im walking and be like “oh sorry didnt see you there.” go with him to the market and try to buy him for four credits and say “oh my bad i thought you were a head of cabbage.” raise all the chairs in the jedi temple just an inch. catch him while he’s sleeping and paint his little nails and then be like “odd that someone caught you slippin master yoda. wonder who could have done that.” leave crumbs in his seat in the jedi council. i mean i would do anything

Strictly speaking, "ultimate" means "last", not "best". It's often figuratively employed in the latter sense to suggest that the thing so described is the final word on the subject, after which nothing more need be said, but if we're being real technical, describing a game or movie that was so bad it killed its entire franchise as the "ultimate" is in fact correct.

i love when characters are just autistic and it’s not a plot device like the autism is just there

reblog this post to give the person you reblogged it from bigger breasts