please tell me there are still people in the lucky luke fandom please please please

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please tell me there are still people in the lucky luke fandom please please please

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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[louder than everyone] MAN I THINK IT DEPENDS!
Still thinking about this mobile game ad I got. You will f**k increasingly large creatures.
A fun, magical and sometimes emotional deconstruction of the deconstruction of tales and fables. The protagonist may be close to a quirky cool cynical fmc, but is sympathetic and likeable in her realistic flaws and arcs. The fairytale worlds are a reasonable moder spin on the Grimm version of themselves, not taken too seriously but still respected in their own merits. Overall very enjoyable read.
The recounting of the personal life of the young nameless protagonist and narrator turns into a disorienting-ly metaphorical short book about feeling detached and aimless. The masterful almost-poetry kind of prose takes you for a dance along pages of vivid shining imagery, up until the last word.
Ed ero rimasta cosĆ a lungo misteriosa per me stessa, che ero diventata indecifrabile e insensata per gli altri, ed ero diventata sola, anche se esistente, e sicura della mia esistenza e di quella degli altri - molto piĆŗ sola di quanto non volessi

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Feeling physical exhaustion as a psychosomatic reaction to things that feel daunting or intimidating is such a ridiculously counterproductive thing to do. Like there's a situation that requires you to be alert and mentally present and paying attention, and your brain just goes "hey I don't wanna. I don't wanna be here. How about going unconscious instead. No fuck you we're warping out. Night night."
Like I would appreciate more information than just "hey there was something but no worry I already pulled the alarm. wdym you need to know what it was. no we don't. we don't have to deal with that, I already pulled a full emergency shutdown." Like bitch yes we fucking do. The fuck did you do that for.
letās be real the pressure to use AI as an adult is exactly what they said the pressure the do drugs as a teenager would be like but the people that told us that caved immediately for the AI and definitely did not just say no
My first piece of advice on the subject is that regardless of what anatomical situation you are dealing with, there is no actual credible, reliable way to physically or medically determine whether or not someone has had sex before. There is no indicator either way, in any physical sense, that would be reliably found in people who have had sex before and be reliably absent on people who haven't, and vice versa. If you find yourself in a situation where someone thinks they need to know whether or not you are a virgin, you can literally just lie. You can just say you're whatever option gets you the outcome you'd rather have.
My second piece of advice on the subject is to do whatever you can to avoid ending up in places where anyone thinks they need to know whether or not you're a virgin. And if you find yourself in one, you should do whatever you can to get out of there.
I miss when ads were a single click and then theyāre gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesnāt even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.
I hate advertising. I hate that you canāt do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that thereās nothing I can do about it.
Iām sick of myself but Iām the only option

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A surprisingly progressive book, considering it was written in 1909 and set in the Middle Ages. Firstly, the relationship between the two male protagonist is heavily coded as romantic (although very toxic), and the one theme of ambiguous gender identity is treated relatively respectfully and without spectacle. Female characters are also pretty much real, even with a start towards the witch/saint duality, the narrative actually expands on that. The story is not moralising, actions are often presented with empathy in context, with no explicit endorsement or condemnation.
Theirry though, has the moral compass and the mental fortitude of a wet fart and hate hate hate hate him so very much.
anyway. onto better things
Something about the bastardization of the story time and time again proves that nobody in power really cares about the people who would resonate with Kingās Carrie White. A girl so ugly and repulsive sheās been removed from her own story. The societal need for women and girls to be constantly perceived as attractive is what fuels a fair amount of her torment in the book, but that person isnāt even allowed to exist on the screen. We cannot empathize with her; it isnāt allowed. Itās fascinating to me.
this is sort of sickening to me. can they swap
I am so tired of short-attention-span, trim-the-fat culture. All writing advice these days is for how to write like Chuck Palahniuk. "Cut 'think', cut 'feel', cut 'wonder' - only action, only pushing forward, show and move and move and move." What if I could emulate this style, and still don't want to? What if I want to write like Henry James, with three paragraphs of introspective musings between each dialogue line? The music advice is, "make it shortform, make it Tik-Tok compatible, make it punchy, hit the refrain as soon as possible." What if I want that 10-minute prog rock piece? What if I want that symphony? What if I want it slow and luxurious and lazy? Movies. Series. Poetry. Bodies. Everything is "trimmed trimmed trimmed trimmed, stripped bare, you have three seconds to win me over, make it airport chic." I don't want to win you over, then, I guess. I want the fat left it. I want the pleasure and the indolence and the indulgence. Fuck this art-advice that's always "your art needs Ozempic."

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āItās easy to assumeā: someoneās misconception is about to be amiably corrected
āItās tempting to assumeā: someoneās assumption is about to be criticized
āItās comforting to assumeā: someoneās assumption is going to be read for filth
Mulan AU where she does get caught by the other fresh recruits while she's bathing but Mushu helps her spin it like the lake is cursed by an evil lizard demon and will turn men into women if they stay in it for too long.
From there it's not actually difficult to get the other soldiers onboard with covering up the fact that poor Ping took one for the team and got afflicted by the vagina curse, especially since it would have been all of them if they hadn't gotten the warning ahead of time. So they agree to help him cover it up, because obviously the army's not going to understand.
Shang is... tentatively glad that the men are bonding and getting along, even if they continue to be deeply weird about it.
Ling: Hey man, what's upā you've got boobs?!?!
Mulan: Uh, what boobs? Huh? Where did these come from?
Mushu: *facepalms and thinks quickly* (speaks from the shadows) I AM THE SPIRIT OF THE LAKE! BEWARE MY CURSED WATERS FOR THEY WILL TURN MEN INTO WOMEN!
Ling, Yao, and Chien Po: Oh no! The spirit of the cursed waters!
Chi-Fu: SHE'S A WOMAN LI SHANG!
Mulan: Look-
Ling, Yao, and Chien Po: WE CAN EXPLAIN!!
[One convoluted, chaotic explanation later]
Shang: ...is this why you've all been insisting we don't camp anywhere that doesn't have a lake.
Shang: and then none of you actually swim in it.
Shang: and you all keep jumping at shadows.
Shang: wait a second Ping did this happen before or after you became insanely good at fighting?
Shang: did you get better at fighting after you became a woman.
Shang: are women better at fighting than us.
Mulan: ....uh. well. maybe? no one's ever tried to find out.
Yao: [thinking very fast] y'know Captain it's just so hard to find recruits these days.
Chien Po: Real shortage of men.
Ling: Lots of women, though.
Mulan: [catching on] Without marriage prospects.
Shang: You're right, men. The spirits must have done this in order to show us that we should be recruiting women as fighters.
Mushu [from the shadows, seeing an opportunity to do the funniest thing]: EXACTLY, LI SHANG. I HAVE TRANSFORMED PING INTO A WOMAN BECAUSE YOU HAVE TOO LONG OVERLOOKED THE TRUE WAY TO WIN THE WAR.
Mulan [seeing an opportunity to get all the stories straight]: O Great Spirit, is it reversible?
Mushu: WHY WOULD YOU WISH TO REJECT MY GIFT? I HAVE SEEN YOUR HEART, CHILD, AND HAVE ALREADY ALTERED THE MEMORIES OF EVERYONE WHO KNEW YOU BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR THE ARMY. YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN THEIR DAUGHTER.
Li Shang: Welp, the spirits have spoken. Ping - wait is your name still Ping if you're a woman now?
Mulan: Uh. Actually, I was thinking of renaming myself. How do you feel about Mulan?
BONUS:
Mulan [climbing out of the eleventh lake the men have arranged for her to swim in]: Yeah no, it didn't work. Still got boobs. [tries to appear dejected].
Chien Po: If it makes you feel better, they're very nice boobs.
Mulan: Thanks, Chien Po.