RUOXI༺🪽༻ @amifawni - Tumblr Blog

BEFORE YOU FOLLOW - (tw for entire blog)

im severely mentally ill, a narcissist, struggle with low empathy, have obsessive tendencies, sex repulsed so if any of that makes you uncomfortable then dont follow! dont hesitate to talk to me though I'd love to be friends ^^

please block dont report. most of it is just venting or posts about mental health

call me either ruoxi/misa:) im asexual, use any pronouns, taken forever by my lovely partner

this is a personal blog to journal or just spam. im not as whiny as i seem in my posts lol

IMPORTANT -

untreated bpd & npd traits diagnosed severe ocd and anxiety.

i'm always platonically affectionate towards everyone, tell me if it makes you uncomfy and don't take it romantically

im a genuinely toxic person sometimes but dont correlate that to my mental illnesses. im 100% pro recovery, just not in a position to get treatment rn but still trying my best to be normal. my posts don't reflect what I actually do or how ! think most of the time so feel free to give me advice or criticism

EXTRAS -

i don't check my notifs while outside, genuinely sorry if I accidentally ignored someone i will 100000% get back to you, just slowly!

•18+ Adults Only

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Keep coming across shite when I don't want to while lurking on cluster b Tumblr aghh

#aspd “larpers” gshdhsggs #and how is that the first response to a collapse I just don't get these ppl #not dir/gen

I keep taking screenshots of random motivational quotes which hit really hard at the moment but then forgetting all about them

#Like you can give me some harsh reality checks but I'd probably not be able to do anything if I don't have any willpower to #I had sticky notes all over my desk bahahah

I really do dislike how my mind is at this moment and want to improve

whenever something bad happens to me I just feel like I deserve it because why else would I be going through that

#actually bpd #bpd feels #borderline personality disorder #actually borderline #bpd #actually cluster b #cluster b safe #cluster b #landmineblogging #landmine jirai #landmine posting #jiraiblr #jirai kei

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Most of the problems in my life were caused by my own mental illnesses, not even other people

#but I'll still blame other folks for it I didn't chooseE to grow up like this and I'm logically still a victim here #venting #vent post

Why is everything the same everyone acts the exact same way and I'm sitting here in the middle of all this bullshit and I'm not happy with my life at all but can't do anything about it. Sm hatred for these fucking people but I can't do anything. They're not even human I don't see them as human

everything is confusing rn im way over my head

#i dont like posting random stuff like this but need to vent

I hate how anxious I am about shit that doesn't even matter I'm 100% scared of literally everything

#most of the time saying that I'm afraid to people just makes them want to hurt me even more #so trashy but eh whatever

I hate seeking supply from external sources though because that's too inconsistent and I don't have any control over it + it's cheap asf and undignified of me. I KNOW by myself that I deserve great things, just needing some real world proof of that

#npd #npd safe #narcissistic personality disorder #actually narcissistic

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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I feel so detached from everyone else idk who these people are I don't get their humor I don't get their interests I don't get how they talk or how they function or what they want me to do for them. I've been putting on an act for so long

#neurodivergence #neurodiverse stuff #actually neurodiverse #neurodivergent #anxiety #social anxiety #bpd feels #actually bpd #bpd #actually borderline #landmine jirai #landmine type #jiraiblr #jirai lifestyle

I want to open up sooo bad but I fucking can't. My brain makes it impossible

#rambling

Have been feeling insanely stressed out and suffocated by some random person. Is it okay for me to just say that I just refuse to take part in this stuff

#also I was feeling all sentimental yesterday but then immediately got pissed #EVERYTIME

I don't want it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I would not mind if they lost interest already. I don't have any thoughts on anything. Don't think about me or speak about me. Can I just make a decision without getting bombarded

Probably I'm living in a permanent fantasy and not reality but it motivates me way more than reality does. Makes things a lot more interesting

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

I'll genuinely hate you if you cut me off or start avoiding me without any explanations or even just a final word. At least scold me or something so I know what I did wrong

#it's one of my fears tbh #jiraiblr #landmine jirai #landmine type #jirai lifestyle #bpd feels #actually bpd #actually borderline #living with borderline #borderline personality disorder #anxiety #cluster b safe #actually cluster b #mental illness #vent

I feel like I don't deserve to actually even talk about my own problems anymore because they've been ignored for the longest time. Why am I always the one taking care of everyone else? With them pushing all of their problems onto me? And when I fail or break down, I get called weak and mocked for it

#venting #bpd feels #actually bpd #bpd #bpd blog #actually borderline #borderline personality disorder #landmine posting #jirai lifestyle #landmine type #landmineblogging #jiraiblr

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