1) “What are you thankful for this year?”
2) “I’m not going to stick my hand up in a dead turkey’s ass.”
3) “My family is coming over soon, so do you want to take a shot with me?”
4) “Looks like it’s going to be another lonely thanksgiving this year.”
5) “Thanksgiving… It’s not about family, it’s all about the Black Friday sale.”
6) “And this is why I am/am not a vegetarian.”
7) “Thanksgiving is not even here yet, so put down the Christmas decorations!”
8) “I didn’t eat anything today because of this.”
9) “It’s never too early for Christmas.”
10) “Why do we always get the food last?”
11) “Did you know the turkey could have been our national bird?”
12) “It’s nice to see you all, but I’m going back up to my room now. Don’t call me until the food is ready.”
13) “I’m sure nobody can tell a difference between a chicken and a turkey.”
14) “Do you want ditch the family and watch a movie?”
15) “Is it all right if I say that your family is really weird?”
16) “I lied, I never liked your homemade cornbread!”
17) “I should warn you about my family…”
18) “I don’t think I’m able to make it again this year.”
19) “Don’t worry, they’re not dead. It’s just food coma.”
20) “I think the turkey is too big for this oven.”
21) “This gravy tastes really off.”
22) “My family doesn’t celebrate Thanksgiving.”
23) “And this is why you never do last minute shopping.”
24) “It’s not really Thanksgiving if no one tries to kill each other.”
25) “I really hate my family.”
26) “You just want a potluck because you’re lazy.”
27) “What the fuck is a turducken suppose to be?”
28) “Thanksgiving, the year where we can stuff ourselves without being shamed.”
29) “It’s too early for Christmas music.”
30) “I went to every store and I still can’t find it!”
