Yoooo

We are controlled by fear. And though we can control our fear, we are much too afraid to try.

I wish for the same thing I’ve hoped for since the beginning. I wish for a life so brave, so unpredictable, so full of unexpected joys and unforgettable love that no box could possibly contain all my memories.

Things are changing. I’ve forgotten your voice, the melancholy sweetness of it and the husky undertones of it. Things are changing. I deleted old messages and scrapped old photographs that were collecting dust on my bookshelf. Things are changing. I reread my high school diary, dragging my finger across the parts about you, cringing softly at my naivety and desire. Things are changing. I closed that diary and tossed it out with my unfinished math homework and B+ essays. Things are changing. Most of my stuff is in boxes, crammed up against one another, patiently waiting to be jostled into a new home. Things are changing. I think I cry more over sweet elderly dogs finding joy in daffodils and antsy squirrels than I do over you. Things are changing. To be completely honest, I never cry over you anymore. Things are changing. You’ve found your passions, I’m seeking out mine, we finally exist in separate spheres living the world on our own. Things are changing. I love myself now, more than ever. And it feels like home. Things are changing. You’ve grown your hair out, your face grew older and your words speak wiser. I am proud of you. Liberation looks beautiful on you. Things are changing. I now finally have an answer to the probing question ‘how long does it take to get over someone?’ 3 years. It took me 3 years to get over you. Things have changed.