ArtIsMyPassion

Este mensaje puede ser inesperado y repentino, pero quiero ofrecer una disculpa sincera, esto me ha estado dando vueltas en la cabeza desde hace meses y quiero dejar en claro cosas que hice el año pasado y me que me da vergüenza recordar, pero siento que es importante que deje en claro lo sucedido aquí Tumblr.

En el fandom de Mitología Griega en la parte de los clásicos de Tumblr, tuve un comportamiento que me da vergüenza ahora que lo reconozco. Me voy a abstener de decir nombres, pero una usuaria artista que hablaba sobre esos temas –las interpretaciones, opiniones, etc—ya ha tenido controversias por su comportamiento basado en ideas retoricas de supremacía blanca, pese a que esta usuaria dice que no es racista, los temas en sus posts pasados que ha tenido y sus opiniones si lo demuestran. Aparte de sus quejas con respecto a varias interpretaciones que han tenido otros artistas sobre las figuras de la mitología griega (siempre por interpretarlos como personas negras o de otra forma que no queda en sus opiniones de que deben ser personas blancas), yo, por estúpida e influenciable, la idealicé, en mi mente es una persona que sabe de estos temas, dibuja bien y ha estudiado y se ha informado mucho, así que para encajar en su círculo, incluso varias veces le señalé que opinaba sobre ciertas interpretaciones de otros artistas y una vez que habló en su blog sobre este tema, la defendí, creyendo genuinamente y de forma ciega su comportamiento, pese que incluso varias de sus opiniones me incomodaban. Admito que la verdad como he estado en el año pasado con un circulo muy conservador y que tenían este tipo de ideas, tampoco lo veía tan grave, pese a que este tipo de comportamientos similares me incomodaban, lo digo no con el objetivo de excusarme porque yo también soy responsable de haberme dejado actuar de esa manera o ser muy influenciable.

Hablo de esto en especial por una polémica que hubo entre esta persona y otra artista de Tumblr, una cuenta pequeña a comparación a la otra, incluso si no ataqué de forma directa a esta cuenta, siento que contribuí de igual forma a esos ataques que le recibieron cuando me puse del lado de esta persona que hoy en día tengo bloqueada, e incluso viendo las opiniones que iban y venían y quedándome al margen o de vez en cuando pensando que era una exageración la reacción de la cuenta afectada. Soy sincera al decir que me da mucha vergüenza este comportamiento que tuve, incluso cuando yo notaba las señales de alerta, en mi idealización ignoré todo, no noté o me realicé de esto hasta noviembre del año pasado, a inicios de ese mes me alejé más o menos de esa zona del fandom y de ese entorno conservador en el que estaba rodeada, a final del mes, cuando volví a meterme en Tumblr y vi como una usuaria le llamó la atención por su comportamiento y opiniones (aparte de que curiosamente esta artista eliminó ciertos posts que la gente le llamó la atención por sus ideas racistas y de supremacía blanca, incluso algunos que tenían cierta xenofobia), me di cuenta de lo mal que estaba todo y de mi actitud.

Quiero dejar en claro que estoy totalmente en contra de actitudes racistas, xenofóbicas o cualquier tipo de comportamiento similar. En mi blog esas no son actitudes que practico y no me educaron con ese comportamiento, y quiero decir que de verdad lo lamento. Me avergüenzo mucho de estas actitudes que tuve incluso en mi ceguera y quiero dejar en claro que no voy a excusarme por ese horrible comportamiento y no volver a repetir estos mismos errores. Incluso si hay gente que no sabe de esto o que fue algo pequeño mi comportamiento en comparación a estas actitudes de otros usuarios, quiero dejarlo en claro, porque es algo que no quiero volver a repetir y que de verdad estoy profundamente arrepentida. Ahora con mi blog, estas actitudes no están en mis valores y en mis interacciones con otras personas, por eso quiero hacer esta disculpa.

Hoy en día la tengo bloqueada, he quitado likes que le he dado a sus dibujos y otros posts e incluso eliminado reposts que he encontrado sobre esta persona, de igual forma aún tengo viejos likes y comentarios en algunas publicaciones que le he comentado, si alguien lo encuentra, quiero dejar en claro que sus ideas no me representan hoy en día, mis valores y lo que me han enseñado en mi familia no se basan en esas ideas y comportamientos tóxicos, y quiero disculparme nuevamente por eso y dejar claro, la verdad me da mucha vergüenza incluso recordarlo, pero lo dejo aquí en claro porque la verdad es algo que no quiero volver a repetir y no quiero afectar a personas vulnerables en un futuro ya sea directa o indirectamente. De verdad lamento mucho mi comportamiento.

Main Situation

So, back in November I wanna say, I was running an event where we would create Black edits of Dionysus from Hades Game. It was really fun! But apparently, people had a problem with that, and I ended up being told about it. I admit it made me extremely angry because while I am used to antiblackness from the Greek Mythology space on here, they don't get to potentially ruin everyone else's fun with their bigotry. Not in the safe, pro-Black space I'm building here, not this time.

Someone in particular, who went by @/Opal0684 , decided that they wanted to misunderstand my belief of "Afro-Greeks are real and always have been, and you don't get to say we aren't allowed to depict mythological figures as such, especially when it does not overtake the endless depictions of them as white," as "Greeks are Black".

This is a common misconception, one that I am starting to believe is on purpose, as it deflects blame from their true issue, which is that I'm depicting their favorites as Black. Anywho, they decided to go on the aforementioned racist run in my notes. A run that includes the sentence "saying Afro-Greeks are impossible isn't hating on anybody, it's just historically accurate." 😐🙃

Margaret chose to reach out to me directly. A respectable act! But when I asked her to overtly confront and disagree with said racist Opal, because she has a history of agreeing with said user on her own page, she dodged it altogether. Now, a peer of hers, @/galusandmalus, at the time accused me of not showing her comments and therefore her perspective. So, this time, I will show you the full conversation and you can come to your own conclusion.

Now, idk about you, but me? If I didn't want to be seen as agreeing with my past sentiments in front of someone harmed by them, especially if I see them as bigoted and inaccurate, I would loudly disagree! Instead, after I blocked her for this and publicly showed that I would not be forgiving her, Margaret took the time to rebrand to @/starweaverblog. You can also find that evidence in this same thread.

"Mean girl drama". Suffice it to say I firmly disagree with you, Ms. Jeanne, that that's what I was experiencing here.

Next Situation

As mentioned earlier, I do not believe that people who willingly cavort with racists can avoid that they, too, are racist. We will address some of those things here.

Around that same conversation in November, I had to deal with @/gemsofgreece (another person that Margaret and other peers publicly have interacted with) on what was an incoherently racist rant talking about the "hopefully small African American Woke Community", trying to colonize Greece and its stories in a way akin to Western Imperialism". It begs the question why someone would even answer a question that begins with the ask "why are foreigners obsessed with-" 🤔 unless... why are the "foreigners" obsessed with WHAT 🤔

Now I will admit, that phrase was kind of hilarious and we did have fun with that. Anyway.

Another person trying to pull the argument that I said "Ancient Greeks were all Black" and not "Afro Greeks existed in Ancient Greece". The overt tones of fear of Great Replacement- a white supremacist belief- ring quite loud. 😐 I'm going to be real. If that phrase doesn't also sound like a hysterical line right out of a Fox News/right wing network headline to you... Idk. But to me, it speaks for itself.

Next Situation

There's both a lot and nothing to say about the casual racism of her and Galus' peer @/katerinaaqu. From witnessing her live on someone's post casually saying that "North African Diomedes' dreadlocks and dark skin haunts her" (and I do know someone- @droodlebug -who also saw her say that, live), to subtweeting about my fanfic being insulting because I dared use an Ethiopian singer's works in an AU where I made Patroclus Black, that means absolutely nothing to anyone or anything because it's FANFICTION... Like. 😐 Just racist over silly shit that could be kept in her head, digging holes for people who won't publicly defend her.

I truly believe if you just ASKED any of these folks directly- and she has been asked- "do you believe that some people in these stories can be depicted as Black", they're going to give you the runaround of how it'll only be acceptable "if" and "who". And it's not hard to tell why someone would do that. Because apparently you have to have permission and follow certain rules to draw people Black in these stories for fun. I wonder why that's not expected of white depictions? 🤔 I wonder what those rules will be? 🤔 I wonder why this energy isn't being expended under the creative pieces of everyone drawing Anglo Saxon blondes? 🤔

Last Situation

This is getting long. So! In case you feel like all of my notes here are solely directed towards my personal experiences of antiblackness, I understand. If I cited to you the creators of all the whitewashed Hades Patrocluses, we'd really be here forever, so I won't do that. Just know that it is very normalized to be antiblack in this space.

But, for proof that the culture of the space itself is not just antiblack, but racist as a whole, there are other users who have been harassed, some to the point of silence and leaving the app, for depicting any of these mythological characters as anything other than white. Dionysus-drawers like @mcsiggy seem to be a common target (Dionysus must be a favorite lmao); really all you have to do is draw a piece of that man and his wife while Not White and if they see it, here comes the microaggressive complaints.

There was also an entire anti-Asian campaign online with @/alatismeni-theitsa (yet another peer) because people had the audacity to enjoy the depiction of Hermes from Hades as Chinese or some other sort of Asian (because apparently South Asian Dionysus is cool, but THAT'S ALL!) Because I'm not of that community, I don't want to speak for them. I just wanted to let you know that while these folks seem to really hate Negroes, the smoke is available for anyone that isn't white! And once again- there's a term for that!

I'm just exhausted of the very obvious culture of white supremacy in the Greek mythology and Classics spacebeing denied. I don't know how anyone could walk into it and not notice it's a Whites Only space (except for the Approved Tokens), with anyone who does enjoy diversity pushed to the outskirts for safety. These are not connections made by happenstance; you can only be a comfortable bigot in a space where bigotry is deemed comfortable. We could at least be honest about it!

In Conclusion

I'm well aware that I will probably be called a bully for pointing out these people's acts. So be it. 🤷🏾‍♀️ If the violence of racism isn't harassment, why would pointing it out be? "Why do you have all this" well I wouldn't have to if people believed in Black people's pain and experiences when they said it 🤷🏾‍♀️

And you, Ms. Jeanne, said that you'd take perspectives as long as they weren't anonymous. I don't feel the need to call out racism anonymously! If the racism was public, the response should be. You- any of you- can always find me here and ask me questions and I will answer you outright- I literally do this every day. For free! And I know what racism looks like because I experience it. Every day. For free!

I am firmly against the idea that racists can seek out white forgiveness for their actions. That's unacceptable. While I understand where you're coming from, you do not get to make the call that Margaret isn't racist- she doesn't get to make that call! Not when you've got users of color and witnesses who could beg to differ! "Not racist" SINCE WHEN?

And while these are just racists kekeing on the internet, my genuine concern here is YOU, Ms. Jeanne, because you said that you're a professor. A teacher! Your word and your beliefs will be passed down to your students. And I worry that you might be spending time with folks that will reflect poorly upon you, or whose beliefs might slip into yours.

What gets taught to the next generation becomes normalized. And those students are gonna have peers of color. You may have students of color! You publish books! People are gonna read what you say, internalize the things that you believe! So I would like to believe you would choose to do the right thing.

Main Situation

So, back in November I wanna say, I was running an event where we would create Black edits of Dionysus from Hades Game. It was really fun! But apparently, people had a problem with that, and I ended up being told about it. I admit it made me extremely angry because while I am used to antiblackness from the Greek Mythology space on here, they don't get to potentially ruin everyone else's fun with their bigotry. Not in the safe, pro-Black space I'm building here, not this time.

Someone in particular, who went by @/Opal0684 , decided that they wanted to misunderstand my belief of "Afro-Greeks are real and always have been, and you don't get to say we aren't allowed to depict mythological figures as such, especially when it does not overtake the endless depictions of them as white," as "Greeks are Black".

This is a common misconception, one that I am starting to believe is on purpose, as it deflects blame from their true issue, which is that I'm depicting their favorites as Black. Anywho, they decided to go on the aforementioned racist run in my notes. A run that includes the sentence "saying Afro-Greeks are impossible isn't hating on anybody, it's just historically accurate." 😐🙃

Margaret chose to reach out to me directly. A respectable act! But when I asked her to overtly confront and disagree with said racist Opal, because she has a history of agreeing with said user on her own page, she dodged it altogether. Now, a peer of hers, @/galusandmalus, at the time accused me of not showing her comments and therefore her perspective. So, this time, I will show you the full conversation and you can come to your own conclusion.

Now, idk about you, but me? If I didn't want to be seen as agreeing with my past sentiments in front of someone harmed by them, especially if I see them as bigoted and inaccurate, I would loudly disagree! Instead, after I blocked her for this and publicly showed that I would not be forgiving her, Margaret took the time to rebrand to @/starweaverblog. You can also find that evidence in this same thread.

"Mean girl drama". Suffice it to say I firmly disagree with you, Ms. Jeanne, that that's what I was experiencing here.

Next Situation

As mentioned earlier, I do not believe that people who willingly cavort with racists can avoid that they, too, are racist. We will address some of those things here.

Around that same conversation in November, I had to deal with @/gemsofgreece (another person that Margaret and other peers publicly have interacted with) on what was an incoherently racist rant talking about the "hopefully small African American Woke Community", trying to colonize Greece and its stories in a way akin to Western Imperialism". It begs the question why someone would even answer a question that begins with the ask "why are foreigners obsessed with-" 🤔 unless... why are the "foreigners" obsessed with WHAT 🤔

Now I will admit, that phrase was kind of hilarious and we did have fun with that. Anyway.

Another person trying to pull the argument that I said "Ancient Greeks were all Black" and not "Afro Greeks existed in Ancient Greece". The overt tones of fear of Great Replacement- a white supremacist belief- ring quite loud. 😐 I'm going to be real. If that phrase doesn't also sound like a hysterical line right out of a Fox News/right wing network headline to you... Idk. But to me, it speaks for itself.

Next Situation

There's both a lot and nothing to say about the casual racism of her and Galus' peer @/katerinaaqu. From witnessing her live on someone's post casually saying that "North African Diomedes' dreadlocks and dark skin haunts her" (and I do know someone- @droodlebug -who also saw her say that, live), to subtweeting about my fanfic being insulting because I dared use an Ethiopian singer's works in an AU where I made Patroclus Black, that means absolutely nothing to anyone or anything because it's FANFICTION... Like. 😐 Just racist over silly shit that could be kept in her head, digging holes for people who won't publicly defend her.

I truly believe if you just ASKED any of these folks directly- and she has been asked- "do you believe that some people in these stories can be depicted as Black", they're going to give you the runaround of how it'll only be acceptable "if" and "who". And it's not hard to tell why someone would do that. Because apparently you have to have permission and follow certain rules to draw people Black in these stories for fun. I wonder why that's not expected of white depictions? 🤔 I wonder what those rules will be? 🤔 I wonder why this energy isn't being expended under the creative pieces of everyone drawing Anglo Saxon blondes? 🤔

Last Situation

This is getting long. So! In case you feel like all of my notes here are solely directed towards my personal experiences of antiblackness, I understand. If I cited to you the creators of all the whitewashed Hades Patrocluses, we'd really be here forever, so I won't do that. Just know that it is very normalized to be antiblack in this space.

But, for proof that the culture of the space itself is not just antiblack, but racist as a whole, there are other users who have been harassed, some to the point of silence and leaving the app, for depicting any of these mythological characters as anything other than white. Dionysus-drawers like @mcsiggy seem to be a common target (Dionysus must be a favorite lmao); really all you have to do is draw a piece of that man and his wife while Not White and if they see it, here comes the microaggressive complaints.

There was also an entire anti-Asian campaign online with @/alatismeni-theitsa (yet another peer) because people had the audacity to enjoy the depiction of Hermes from Hades as Chinese or some other sort of Asian (because apparently South Asian Dionysus is cool, but THAT'S ALL!) Because I'm not of that community, I don't want to speak for them. I just wanted to let you know that while these folks seem to really hate Negroes, the smoke is available for anyone that isn't white! And once again- there's a term for that!

I'm just exhausted of the very obvious culture of white supremacy in the Greek mythology and Classics spacebeing denied. I don't know how anyone could walk into it and not notice it's a Whites Only space (except for the Approved Tokens), with anyone who does enjoy diversity pushed to the outskirts for safety. These are not connections made by happenstance; you can only be a comfortable bigot in a space where bigotry is deemed comfortable. We could at least be honest about it!

In Conclusion

I'm well aware that I will probably be called a bully for pointing out these people's acts. So be it. 🤷🏾‍♀️ If the violence of racism isn't harassment, why would pointing it out be? "Why do you have all this" well I wouldn't have to if people believed in Black people's pain and experiences when they said it 🤷🏾‍♀️

And you, Ms. Jeanne, said that you'd take perspectives as long as they weren't anonymous. I don't feel the need to call out racism anonymously! If the racism was public, the response should be. You- any of you- can always find me here and ask me questions and I will answer you outright- I literally do this every day. For free! And I know what racism looks like because I experience it. Every day. For free!

I am firmly against the idea that racists can seek out white forgiveness for their actions. That's unacceptable. While I understand where you're coming from, you do not get to make the call that Margaret isn't racist- she doesn't get to make that call! Not when you've got users of color and witnesses who could beg to differ! "Not racist" SINCE WHEN?

And while these are just racists kekeing on the internet, my genuine concern here is YOU, Ms. Jeanne, because you said that you're a professor. A teacher! Your word and your beliefs will be passed down to your students. And I worry that you might be spending time with folks that will reflect poorly upon you, or whose beliefs might slip into yours.

What gets taught to the next generation becomes normalized. And those students are gonna have peers of color. You may have students of color! You publish books! People are gonna read what you say, internalize the things that you believe! So I would like to believe you would choose to do the right thing.