on and off

- ʀᴀꜰᴀʏᴇʟ -

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warnings!: degrading (whore, slut), slight fingering, unprotected p in v (wrap ur willy before it gets silly), rough doggy <3

word count!: 493.

Nana ~Boyfriend headcanons~

Manga/anime: Nana

Warnings: nothing

(Y/N): your name

H. Ren

Ren is a very insecure boy, even if he covers this insecurity with a veil of bravado and by acting tough. In fact, when you two are alone, he's much more shy around you than he's in front of other people: he sometimes just needs to be reassured and consoled and advised by you

What does Ren like to do most with you? Nothing. Or rather, everything. He enjoys doing every activity with you, from cooking dinner to doing laundry with you. In fact, whenever he's available, you two can do all sorts of activities together

Ren loves when you come to see Trapnest's concerts, and he always gets you tickets in the best seats and access to their dressing room: there's nothing he likes more than seeing you come to him after the concert is over. Furthermore, he would also like you to listen to his band's rehearsals, but Takumi the other members are against it because he gets distracted watching you, so he doesn't play well. Plus, know he wants to take you on tour with him every time, and, if his managers are against it, he'll insist until they allow it

I think Ren's first love language is quality time: since he's always very busy with Trapnest, he thinks the best way to show you affection is to spend as much time with you as possible. In fact, whenever he has free time, he stays with you, doing all sorts of activities together with you, like cooking, teaching you to play the bass, reading or watching a movie

Ren doesn't call you by any particular and imaginative nickname. In fact, he usually calls you by your name, but he sometimes uses classic nicknames for you, such as "love", "darling" or "dear". However, he only does this in some specific cases: for example, when he's jealous, he uses "darling"; when he comes home upset from a busy day, he calls you "love" (sometimes also "my love"). Instead, when he's in a particularly sweet mood, he calls you "beauty"

🎸SCENARIO — Ren can’t fonction properly without you.

AUTHOR’S NOTE! — this doesn’t have much dialogue bc I was meant to write this for a bit on j.ai and I got a bit carried away with my feels.. i hope you like this either way😭.

WARNINGS — mention of drugs, self deprivation and body worship.

Ren was a talented musician and what were you? you were just a burden that satisfied him enough to let him keep you around. you depend on him too much, you were.. hung up on him. that’s what you believed anyway, but you couldn’t have been more wrong.

but to Ren.. oh Ren, you were everything to him. he’s the one feeling so dependent of you, after all you were the one keeping him together till this day. he loved crashing over at your house every now and then, lighting up a cig on your couch as he’d greet you with a smirk “hey hon’..♡“ in his deep and sultry voice that somehow—always had you letting out a soft chuckle. he seriously couldn’t function properly without you, he had to get his act together, just like yasu would tell him after he showed up high to a band practice. he wouldn’t have been doing it if the music industry wasn’t so hard for him, he just couldn’t bear being away from you for so long and it was destroying him.

you always thought he was joking around when he’d ask you if you’d be happier if he had quit trapnest—left his music career, all behind for you. after all, he had a habit of being playful but at the same time, you couldn’t bring yourself to put him in that position. have him give up all of his dreams and ambitions for you? a simple girl? it just wouldn’t do. the media gossip would’ve been insane and the last thing you want to do is upset his friends and band mates. yet, selfishly so, that’s what you wanted deep down. to say yes, to plead him to stay with you. that way, you both could see each other whenever and not have to worry about any tours taking him away.

but who were you to say that? you were just his girlfriend, nothing more. what more could you be? doubt often invaded your mind and even when you were so good at hiding your emotions, ren could tell. if only you had known that he wasn’t planning on keeping you just his girlfriend for too long. the ring in his pocket might get rusty..

“you look down on yourself too much,” he’d start with a frown, pulling your head close to his chest thanks to the hand he had placed behind your head, tangled in your soft locks. “are you tryin’ to make me sad?“ he’d ask in a bittersweet yet playful tone, his other hand cupping your cheek in his palm as he brushed away a stray tear, his face now inches from yours. you were so pretty, crying over him like this. you were far too precious to him.

how couldn’t you have noticed how much he needed you in his life? it should’ve been obvious when he’d often spend hours worshipping your body.. it should’ve been obvious with how many songs he’d write for you and then brag about them to you..

it should’ve been obvious with how worried and frustrated he had been to see your face all over the newspaper after the paparazzi had taken a shot of you two walking out of his apartment together. it should’ve been obvious with the way he rushed past all of the paparazzi swirling around your house to be there with you, lashing out at any of them that tried taking a picture.

it should’ve been obvious with the way he was clutching onto you, pleading in that sad low tone of his that you wouldn’t leave him alone, for the sake of his reputation. he loved you too much for that.

there is no possible way you could’ve possibly understood the depth of his love for you. after all, he couldn’t even count how many times you had slept in the bathtub, cradling him in your arms after finding out he had just passed out in there. you must have been so worried, but you didn’t bring it up. you knew he must’ve been struggling since he couldn’t seem to stop drugging himself. but he could feel your hand taking the small plastic bag away from his fingers, your form pressed against him in a hug in a silent attempt to stop him from doing this. you wouldn’t let him succumb to the darkness, you were there. you always would be, through good and the bad.

“  Flowers and Plants   ”

Photo by Ishikoro. Japan.