Welcome to my twisted ankle

i’m so thirsty… won’t you use /water to water me?

/water

Aw, what a good girl. That’s right, kitten. You’re going to come back to my house and. Wgat was that.

guy whos email is mario19 cuz he is 19 years old and when hes 20 he deletes the old mail and resigns up to every service with mario20 and when he gets to mario25 and its in use already he solidifies into a stone statue and stays in stasis for a year

If he’s your man why is he rolled up in my katamari

everyone riding the train today got 250 xp after a level 32 dracula wandered onto the tracks

I'm part of a clandestine operation to have a good day

if a man suddenly gets into pokemon in his late 20s. well i dont know what means. nothing ever makes sense anymore. *tearing up, sudden southern accent* Everything feels different

looking at jobs is like vintage toothpick sorter entry level immediate start ..... wow maybe I could be a vintage toothpick sorter.... *starts to envision a future where I am deeply involved in vintage toothpick sorting* *scrolls down* "5 years vintage toothpick sorting required Minimum!" *my dreams of vintage toothpick sorting dissolve into dust"

no, YOU have to do it scared. IM going to fruitlessly wait for the perfect moment forever