Me, Her, And The Aliens

he died

“he boot too big for he gotdamn feet” is literally the funniest phrase in the english language. im considering putting it on my tombstone

but is it really better than man door hand hook car door

he hand hook too big for he gotdamn car door

tbt when four leaked and someone told harry their favourite song was one of the leaked ones on twitter and he was like BUT YOU HAVEN’T HEARD THAT HAVE YOU NOPE

just lie down on the sidewalk with your tongue against the concrete till th whole world dissolves like an uncoated pill

i wanna know if op was okay when writing this

one day youll be face to face with whatever saw fit to let you exist in the universe and youll have to justify the space youve filled

what

You can literally see his curves through baggy clothes, he’s so beautiful.

Please fire me. I work at McDonald’s and last week I spent 15 minutes trying to explain to an old man they we do not sell hot dogs (McDogs as he claimed it) then he threatened to report me for “withholding products from him”!

hes from an alternate timeline

the McDogs man actually proves the multiverse theory

me and the girls out on the town

I’m the girl on the right sitting down because my feet hurt and my shoes are uncomfortable