2020: Who Saw THIS Coming?
Remember when I retired from blogging?
I actually did retire, except, I consider this little corner of the Internet -- MY corner -- to be a place where I document the big stuff. I told you about my engagement and then came back several months later to recap my wedding. Remember that?Ā The wedding that THANKFULLY occurred in late 2019 before the world turned to shit??
Yeah. You know what happened.Ā āThe pandemic.āĀ āThe virus.āĀ āCovid.ā Covid-19ā³ (I personally prefer the first five Covids; I feel like they really fell off after that).Ā āCORONAVIRUS.āĀ
THE DUMPSTER FIRE THAT IS...2020.
Suuuuuuuuure, good olā Rona robbed Leo and me of our Italian honeymoon, but aside from that? We were able to squeeze in all kinds of fun things in good ol 2019 -- oh how I miss you, 2019 -- and have an unforgettable year. This year is proving to be unforgettable too -- just, ya know -- in like, a traumatizing sorta way.
Anyway, as I was saying, I have to document the big stuff on here. I imagine myself reading and looking back on this blog like an old, embarrassing diary (hell, I do it already) (the dating posts make me want to die) and who can omit THIS chapter? Itās got it all: a deadly virus, racially fueled riots and protesting, social injustice, a deranged madman in the oval office, and... MURDER HORNETS?
So rather than write out a whole long thing about my experience in 2020, I thought Iād break it down by month, starting in March. Iām going to be documenting the good, the BAD (thereās a decent amount of that), and anything new that transpired in that time frame. Did I take up any hobbies? Start baking sourdough? I guess youāll find out.Ā
The good. There was immediately a novelty to this whole Covid-19 thing. In the first half of the month I was commuting, going to work in my NYC office, and doing my usual amount of social things on weekends. When it was decided in mid-March that weād have to work and stay home for a ābitā (lol), there was something exciting about it. We made jokes about social distancing and masks and had cutesy puns forĀ āquarantining.ā We hit the ground RUNNING with Zoom calls/video chats. There was something fun and exhilarating about all this.
The bad. People I KNOW got this virus. People I know LOST people to this virus. My Grandmaās health took a turn and things did not look good, but I couldnāt go see her. Shit, I didnāt see ANYONE except Leo, and even he was going to work in his office every day. I had to get used to this abrupt abundance of...alone time.Ā
Whatās new? Iāve always taken to social media as a creative outlet, but I QUICKLY started using it more -- and differently -- once things in the world got hairy. I treated my Instagram like my one gateway to the outside world, because it was: I surveyed my followers and asked how they were doing. I took silly videos talking to myself in the mirror. I wrote long captions on my photos letting everyone know what my experience was like. I tried to entertain those who were stuck at home, as I was, and needing an escape.Ā
Oh, and ya know... Tiger King.
The good. The weather was getting nicer, so Leo and I took advantage and often went for walks around our complex and even a local trail/preserve in our town. We started doingĀ ālawn visitsā to see our families from a distance, and that helped. For two people who were used to seeing theirĀ āpeopleā regularly, 3-4 weeks of not seeing them took a toll. I also started doingĀ āGrateful Aprilā on Instagram, where I shared a few things each day that made me happy/appreciative. Some followers of mine followed suit, which was awesome to see.Ā
The bad. Hmm, I think all this sitting and lack of moving is hurting my back? (#foreshadowing). Also, ENOUGH with the Zoom calls andĀ āvirtual happy hours,ā for the LOVE OF GOD! Oh, and that ānoveltyā I mentioned in March? That wore off quickly, and a lot of us started to feel weird, sad, isolated, uneasy, unproductive and stir-crazy. Myself included.
We were also reminded that this was the month we were supposed to depart for our honeymoon. Ugh.
Whatās New? I did some arts & crafts (I painted ceramic bowls I bought from Target), gave myself a mediocre pedicure, found new/creative ways to engage and interact with folks on social media (polls, asking questions like āwhatās in your Amazon cart?ā and āwho sponsors your quarantine?ā), and got to see what it was like to have a husband with hair.Ā I also discovered my love of tie-dye and wore...a lot of it.Ā
Oh, and I was on CBS news talking about screen time. Iconic.Ā
The good. The weather got summer-like and I definitely felt a MAJOR shift in my mood. Leo and I spent more time outside on our deck: listening to music, making margaritas, talking to neighbors. I even took work calls outside and got some much-needed Vitamin D. I had my first real ābeach daysā (bathing suit, chair and all). I started to FINALLY see my family in person; first, outside only -- and then eventually indoors. Ā
The bad. Ahmaud Arbery. George Floyd, obviously. Dumb-dumbs protesting the lock-down and demanding haircuts. CLEARLY more to come on this. (See: June)
Oh, and my back pain? WAY worse.
Whatās new? Some more arts and crafts: I started painting shells I found on the beach (lol).Ā I bought a pair of Crocs and documented the most absurd series on social media where I paired the heinous footwear with items that rhymed (Crocs & socks, Crocs & shamrocks, Crocs & botox...you get the idea.) I experimented with a few new recipes (made lemon poppy muffins & homemade vodka sauce). I re-watched Mad Men and it made me miss my office and coworkers.Ā
The good. We started doing more social things with our families: BBQs, celebrating Fatherās Day, our nephewās baptism. Doing this truly felt likeĀ ānormalcyā and in those moments, weād forget about all the garbage going on around us. I also decided (yes, after 3 friggin months of lock-down) that I needed to start exercising; something I needed for my physical AND mental health. I thought it could help my back -- which, yes, was feeling worse as time went on -- and it did make me feel good to spend a little time each day walking, jogging, lifting weights and just MOVING.Ā
The bad. Um? Everything? For starters, the racial tension in the country came to a head and erupted in a MAJOR way -- and while the protests and all the #BlackLivesMatter movements were a positive thing, it absolutely brought out the WORST in so many others. There was rioting, looting and violence. Racism ran RAMPANT. Karens went wild. āCovidiotsā were ENRAGED about being told to wear masks. There was police brutality and a President who threw fuel into the fire. Tensions and emotions were at an all-time high and we all got a harsh dose of reality that this country has SO FAR TO GO in regards to equality and civil rights and even basic human decency. I was -- and still am -- sad for this country.
Also? I finally went for an MRI on my back and found out I have two herniated discs; well THAT certainly helps explain things! Shortly after, I pull my back out entirely, and could not walk or move. The pain is excruciating; debilitating and I think,Ā ācan things get any worse?ā and then...
It hurts. It still does. It was inevitable -- as death is, especially given her age and health condition at the time -- but it still felt like taking a bullet. I will always be grateful that I was able to get to see her one day before she passed away to say goodbye, but itās hard not to be resentful that she didnāt get the memorial service and send-off she so deserved because of the pandemic.
(Side note: read about my amazing Grandma HERE)
Whatās new?Ā We got a new stationary bike and set it up outside on the deck which was awesome, and I ended the month getting some epidural shots at the spine doctor. While the (strong) meds and injections didnāt exactly *cure* my issue, they made things a LOT better.Ā Leo and I also drove into NYC (my first time there in MONTHS!) so I could go get my migraine Botox treatment at my neurologist.Ā
I voted by mail (which is not fraudulent, by the way) (#eyeroll) in the NY Primary.Ā
I also got not one, but TWO, amazing rainbows the week my grandmother passed away. I needed those, and Iād like to think she knew that.
The good. More beach days and some consistent amazing weather (thanks, Mother Nature!). I started seeing a chiropractor twice a week and quickly respond REALLY WELL to treatment and start feeling a lot better. I put things into perspective and realize how lucky I am to live where I do -- on the beach -- and get to enjoy all this newfound free time doing things I enjoy. We also celebrate some family birthdays and have a small family gathering in honor of our beloved Dorothy.Ā
Have you noticed thatĀ āseeing familyā always ends up in myĀ āgoodā section?
The bad. Naya Rivera died unexpectedly, John Lewis died, REGIS died. Our President remains as unhinged as ever, we desperately want to #FreeBritney, and Kanye West has a really sad, scary and concerning, uh, episode. Heās also running for President, maybe? Or not? On a personal note, Leo and I tried to eat dinner on the beach one night and LIT-rally got attacked by seagulls. Weeks later, bull sharks are spotted in the ocean RIGHT WHERE WE LIVE, and they prohibit swimming.Ā
Whatās new? Hamilton on Disney+: need I say more? The fig tree thatās been on our deck for three summers FINALLY started to grow figs! I re-watched Broad City and it is just... *chefās kiss*Ā perfection. Taylor Swift releases her albumĀ āfolkloreā and I listen on repeat for seven days straight.
Well, who knows? Weāre not there yet. 2020 has certainly been a ride (and itās not over yet; dear GOD), and I still canāt believe it ended up being this insane year, unlike anything Iāve EVER experienced. And while it undoubtedly has come with its fair share of challenges,Ā it has also come with some blessings.
I have all this extra time now and I make a point to use it productively (most days). I log off from working and go outside, I walk the beach, go in our complex pool, ride the stationary bike, catch up with friends/family on the phone, read, and watch/re-watch shows.
The commute and hustle and bustle of every day in my pre-pandemic life would make me stressed and anxious; I was constantly snoozing alarm clocks, rushing in the mornings, dealing with overcrowded/delayed trains, and getting home late each night.Ā
Life has become slower, in a good way, and itās made me appreciate the simple things. I care less about material things and more about the basics: enjoying nice weather/the outdoors, my home, my husband, my family and close friends.
I genuinely stopped caring about getting my hair and nails done, going out to dinner, getting dolled up, or traveling. Donāt get me wrong: I enjoy all these things and Iāll of course do them again, but this whole situation made me realize that what I need *most* in this world are the simple joys that money canāt buy.
And for that? Iām grateful.Ā