The struggles of being in love (one-shot)
Jace couldn't sleep without his parabatai anymore.
It started the night after Alec got seriously injured during eradication of a shockingly large demonic nest that somehow managed to grow to this unbelievable size without anyone noticing. Near the end of the heated fight, a sharp claw pierced the archer's shoulder dangerously close to the heart, although not too deep. But witnessing it from an awkward angle while standing far away, Jace couldn't know it wasn't, in fact, a deadly wound. He felt the intense, mirrored by their bond pain, heard his best friend curse loudly as he slayed the beast, and simply assumed the worst. Raw fear flooded his already adrenaline-high body upon seeing the archer's hopeless attempt to stop the profound bleeding. Despite the pressure, blood kept pouring through his fingers all over the black leather jacket, and onto the concrete floor. They caught very panicked eye contact, and everything that followed became a blur, which faded only when Alec was safely sitting in the infirmary, having his injury properly taken care of.
Apparently, because Jace didn't remember clearly, all the way from the abandoned factory to the Institute, he refused to leave his parabatai's side, tightly held onto the healthy arm and threatened with violence everyone wanting to separate them, even the medic just trying to help.
Somehow, the damage being nicely patched up did not make the Shadowhunter feel any better. Many trusted people, including the victim himself, assured there was nothing to worry about, yet he wouldn't calm down, his heart raced impossibly fast, lungs refused to take in full breaths, foggy mind played the traumatic situation on repeat.
That dreadful thought followed him the whole day, preventing from focusing on anything other than the possibility of losing his precious parabatai. Would he even survive that? Their connection has been so strong since the moment they met, it sometimes felt like one's death could easily claim the other. The bond became so deep over years, the edges started to slowly blend as they grew closer. Too close, some might say, if they only dared to speak up, fearing enraging the unhinged warrior.
It wouldn't be a lie though, a few months ago their hearts began to beat a little faster whenever they stood next to each-other, skin burned after every single touch, precious runes ached uncomfortably when apart for a long time. Overwhelmed by strange sensations, a week before the archer’s accident, the two confused Shadowhunters finally sat down in private to have a chat, perhaps figure out what was happening to them, and that's when the line got crossed.
Hearing Alec's voice break as he explained how he cannot hide those unbearable feelings anymore and apologising for having them in the first place, Jace’s heart shattered into pieces. The fact someone he shared a soul with was ashamed of falling in love made him nauseous.
After all, it was unavoidable.
Unable to listen to that horrible, extremely pointless rant, he grabbed the archer's face and kissed him until their lungs ran out of air. Then proceeded to convince his parabatai this is not a one-sided feeling. Which was harder than it should be. Alec couldn't comprehend being an object of Jace's adoration because apparently, he did not deserve to be loved.
In reality, he deserved the world. And Jace was planning on giving him just that.
-You know I can feel you staring? -Alec groaned, cracking open his tired eyes to look at the barely visible intruder lurking in the dark.
They’ve been sleeping together every night since they confessed, however knowing he’s very clingy, the younger Shadowhunter decided to stay in his room to not unconsciously hurt his boyfriend further. It was a terrible idea. For some unknown reason, he was insanely concerned the love of his life could die in his sleep from that not life-threatening injury, which ultimately prevented him from being able to sleep.
-I’m sorry. I just…I had to check. -he admitted, nervously playing with the hem of his oversized hoodie.
-Jace… -the archer sighed heavily. -C’mere babe. -he ordered while pulling the blanket up in a welcoming manner. Hesitating only a little, although unable to refuse, Jace obediently climbed onto the bed and plastered himself to his best friend’s naked chest. His hand instinctively travelled to the wound, fingers gently slid through the bandage before travelling down towards the familiar rune and staying there, seeking comfort through direct touch while he tried to have some rest. -Your overthinking is making me nervous. -Alec added a few minutes later, unable to fall back asleep due to prominent anxiety resonating from their sacred connection. -What’s wrong sweetheart? -he hummed, gently brushing aside those golden strands covering the wide open, two-coloured eyes.
-...this shouldn’t have happened. -Jace whispered, pressing onto the raised scar as he began to trace the symbol in an attempt to calm himself down.
-I agree. I made a mistake. -the archer responded quietly, his heart breaking at the sensation of cold tears dropping onto his warm skin.
-I should’ve protected you.
-I’m my own responsibility.
-Bullshit! -Jace barked, furiously wiping his cheeks whilst his boyfriend tightened the hold around his tense shoulders. -We’re parabatai, we share the responsibility!
-You’re right. We are parabatai. So why on the angel can’t you feel through our bond that everything is alright? -Alec asked, irritation clear in his otherwise soft tone. -I’m alive, Jace. Stop worrying and go to sleep, I can tell you’re exhausted and so am I. -he added, pressing a delicate kiss to the younger man's head before going back to sleep. -I’ll still be here when you wake up. I promise.
Somewhat comforted by this assurance, Jace's brain finally went silent. In a matter of seconds he was gone, at last getting much needed rest, until someone walked in into the room at an unreasonably early hour and a loud, familiar voice sounded:
-Rise and shine, lovebirds! Ever heard of locking the door?
-Fuck off Iz. -Jace mumbled, absolutely refusing to wake up. He was way too comfortable in this tender, loving embrace to face the harsh reality of being awake.
-Good morning to you too, Jace. -Izzy grinned, carefully sitting down next to her brother. -Hey. How are you feeling? -she wondered, gently touching the bandaged shoulder.
-Sore. -Alec responded vaguely, a painful grimace appearing on his face as he pulled himself up revealed it might hurt more than he was willing to admit. Must have, actually. There was no way it didn’t.
-I bet. Having all that extra weight on you surely didn’t help. -his sister snorted, referring to the clingy Shadowhunter holding onto his boyfriend’s waist. -What about you, Jace? You lost your shit a little yesterday. -she observed, playfully ruffling the blond hair of the half-asleep man.
-Better. -he murmured while happily leaning into the hand fondly rubbing his spine.
-Wow, nice talking to you guys, great chat. -Isabelle rolled her eyes. Still, she was thrilled her favourite boys stopped being clueless idiots and finally got together. As they should've years ago. -I’m gonna keep an eye on the Institute today, so you two get some rest.
-Thanks Izzy. -the archer smiled, immensely grateful for having uninterrupted time to spend with his boyfriend and make sure he’s not going crazy from all that unreasonable guilt clearly eating him alive.
-No problem. -the Shadowhunter winked as she got up. -But don’t think you won’t owe me one!
Once Iz left, the couple didn't move for a good half an hour. In complete silence they enjoyed each-other’s presence, soaked into the idyllic softness of their peaceful bond. This was truly an otherworldly experience, loving and being loved by someone whose soul you could actually feel with your own. Like if you were wrapped in a thick, fluffy blanket on a freezing cold night.
-Jace, baby, as much as I love having you so close, I need you to take off that hoodie. -Alec requested, unable to stand the overwhelming warmth anymore. His boyfriend snorted loudly in response and slowly pulled himself up.
-Feeling kinky today? -he teased as he got onto his knees to remove the problematic piece of clothing. -This time it could be your mom walking in here. -pointed out, but the archer didn’t seem to listen, his gaze focused on the muscular abdomen, fingers instinctively migrated towards their shared rune, began to trace the dark lines. Jace froze in place, leaned into the pleasant touch and whined loudly when suddenly, that large palm squeezed his covered penis, causing a strong jolt of arousal to go through his now fully awakened body.
-Sit on my thighs. -Alec ordered and the other Shadowhunter obediently complied, very happy this morning took such a turn. The archer swiftly pulled his parabatai’s sweatpants down, revealing the quickly growing erection. But instead of grabbing that needy penis and giving it some delightful strokes, he took out his own, equally aroused manhood, and said:
-Touch yourself, I'm going to watch.
And just like that, Jace’s heart started to beat like crazy, blood rushed to his cock, hardening it impossibly fast. Clouded with raw desire, he wrapped his fingers around the twitching dick and promptly began the show, pleasured himself while his boyfriend masturbated to the erotic view.
He's never done anything like that before. Sex was always simply fucking or being fucked. Not once the idea of jerking off in someone’s lap came through his mind.
-Fuck, you’re so beautiful. -Alec hummed, looking at that adorably flushed face, those hazy eyes and involuntarily thrusting hips. He wanted to hear those bitten off moans oh, so bad, but since the room wasn’t currently soundproofed, they had to keep it reasonably quiet. Which wasn't easy considering how good this felt. Soon both began to feel orgasm approach, their movements frantic, bodies desperate for release, insanely hungry gazes locked right before the archer gave the last order:
As instructed, the younger man sped up the strokes and soon came all over his chiselled abs while the other finished a moment later, pushed over the edge by that delicious, mind-blowing sight.
-Jace sweetheart, you okay? -asked the older Shadowhunter after he recovered, slightly concerned by his boyfriend’s spaced out expression.
-Yeah, I just…never been ordered around in bed before. -Jace whispered, still shaken up by what just happened.
-Shit. I’m so sorry if I crossed a line. -Alec cursed, realising he didn't ask for any consent. So far they've had sex only a few times, thus were yet to learn how to properly approach the intimacy part. -I got carried away.
-No! Don’t be sorry, that was fucking amazing! -the blonde eagerly shook his head. -I’m gonna need more of that in the future. -murmured, leaning down to steal a long, breathtaking kiss from his overjoyed man’s flushed face. -And here I thought I knew everything about you. -he grinned once they parted.
Knowing his parabatai had zero previous experience, it was fascinating to watch him discover what works for him best. So full of that overpowering joy, he let himself get dragged to the shower for a much-needed clean up and a spontaneous second round.
Unfortunately, from that point, the initial bliss of a brand-new relationship began to fade, and things started to change.
She was nice, full of Jace-like energy, and completely alone. Which made him relate to her so much. The two of them quickly became friends, and he felt somewhat obliged to help her find her mother. It felt like the right thing to do. At least he thought so, because Alec was openly against it. According to him, this was reckless, dangerous and should come to an immediate stop. This caused a rather nasty argument ending with the younger, pissed off Shadowhunter shedding angry tears until utterly exhausted he fell asleep in his boyfriend’s arms because, despite being on the opposite side, the archer was essentially the only person who could calm him down.
Upon learning why Jace was so adamant about helping Clary, Alec backed off, however the bitterness stayed, creating this uncomfortable tension between everyone in the team. Whenever asked about it by his parabatai, he insisted everything is fine. So irritated with that lack of clarity, the Shadowhunter decided to seek insight from someone who might have known the reason behind his best friend’s strange behaviour.
-Hey, Iz, do you know what’s been going on with Alec recently? He seems angry, but keeps saying it’s nothing. -Jace inquired as he entered the armoury where Izzy had been sharpening a sword.
-Are you stupid or something, Jace? -she responded, shooting him a rather disappointed look. -He’s obviously jealous.
-...of what? -the Shadowhunter frowned, honestly surprised by such a strange assumption.
-Thanks for answering my question. -Isabelle snorted, returning to the interrupted task. -Dunno, maybe that new, pretty girl you’ve been hanging out with all the time lately? -she suggested. -Is that fancy bond of yours actually working? How can you be so clueless?
That made a lot of sense.
Whilst there was absolutely nothing between them but friendship, from the outside it surely could look like a closer relationship, based on the amount of time the two of them had been spending together, and them being very comfortable around each-other. Nevertheless, Jace was absolutely not interested in anyone who wasn’t his current boyfriend. Alec was the love of his life, no one else existed.
Suspecting the archer might need to be told this directly, he immediately went to look for his parabatai to at last resolve their newfound issue. The older Shadowhunter was, as expected, in the training room, throwing punches into a bag like every single time something was troubling him. The furious look in his eyes only confirmed the suspicions.
-Babe, are you jealous of Clary? -Jace asked blatantly, aware that being straightforward with his best friend always brought best results.
-N-no?! -Alec exclaimed, trying to look shocked, although the prompt appearance of a blush on his cheeks instantly gave the truth away. What the Shadowhunter decided to ignore. He didn't care that Alec was jealous, he just wanted him to feel comfortable communicating such feelings instead of bottling them up.
-Okay. -the blonde nodded understandingly before adding:
-You know I love you, right?
Hearing that, the archer’s nervous expression brightened up.
-Yeah, I know. -he smiled, in such an adorable, loving way, it made Jace’s heart flutter.
-Good. Keep that in mind, alright?
-I will. -Alec agreed. -Jace, wait. -he then sighed when his parabatai turned around to leave. -I was jealous. I’m sorry.
-Don’t apologise. -the blonde shook his head as he started to walk towards the older man. -It’s actually pretty hot to think you love me so much, you cannot stand seeing me being a little too friendly with other people.
-I just got you. The idea of losing you is driving me crazy. -the archer revealed, angry tears clouding his sight. It was painful to watch the person he loved be so insecure about their relationship that was supposedly rock solid.
-Don’t worry babe, I’m all yours. -Jace assured, firmly squeezing the sweaty palm. -Soul and body. -he added, suggestively pressing his boyfriend’s hand to his already growing erection. The Shadowhunter’s glossy eyes instantly darkened upon feeling the sizable bulge form under his light touch.
-Someone could seriously walk in on us. -he pointed out, however didn't let go, rather put more pressure on the covered penis, causing the younger man to moan quietly.
-Not if we lock the door. -the blonde grinned, and Alec seemed to like this simple solution. He joined their lips in a heated kiss and quickly walked them backwards, towards the entrance he locked when Jace’s back hit the door.
Their starved lips didn’t part for a while, hands greedily explored the skin while hips rubbed their hard dicks together. They haven’t had sex for a while, not solely due to their issues, the mission turned out to be more physically demanding than anyone imagined. So most nights the two of them would pass out in a loose embrace, too tired for anything intimate.
-Get on your knees, now. -Alec ordered as he abruptly pulled away, and oh, Jace did not hesitate for a second. He dropped onto the floor, although despite itching all over, refrained from doing anything else until explicitly told so. The archer seemed to like that obedient behaviour. His palm promptly disappeared inside the sweatpants, began to stroke the hard cock while slowly taking it out.
-Open up. -he demanded, free hand firmly grabbing the younger man’s chin and tilting it up before sliding his penis deep inside his boyfriend’s throat. The blonde instantly swallowed, causing his parabatai to groan a little too loudly. Clearly satisfied with that unexpected occurrence, Alec immediately entangled his long fingers into those soft, golden strands and began to fuck into Jace’s flushed face like if he was a sex toy, not a person who needs to breathe.
Nevertheless, the kneeling Shadowhunter did not mind at all. Being treated as a tool serving a sole purpose of delivering pleasure to someone he loved was actually really fucking hot. The fact the archer looked like a fucking snack only added to the erotic experience. His head was tilted backwards, dark, glossy eyes half-open, sweaty muscles covered in runes flexed as he thrust. That view itself could make Jace come if he only dared to reach inside his own pants. He knew too well if he behaves, his parabatai will reward him in the most divine way.
-Fuck! -Alec cursed when the younger man’s throat contracted on his tip particularly tight. -Fuck, baby, I’m going to come. -he growled, his movements speeding up, choking the kneeling Shadowhunter with their roughness. Soon enough, those hips pushed far forward, pressing deep inside as the intense release came. -Your turn. -the satisfied archer smirked upon withdrawing. He then dropped to the ground, pushed his heavily breathing boyfriend to the door and kissed him while his hands quickly worked the strained zipper open.
Jace’s mind nearly blanked at the euphoric sensation of those long, slim fingers touching his throbbing erection, failed, however, to stop a particularly loud whine when they began to gently spread pre-cum on the sensitive tip. With a grin on his flushed face, Alec parted their lips and backed away to get better access to the rock hard cock he leaned towards and swallowed whole without any warning, forcing his parabatai to spill a sea of curses whilst his hands entangled in those sweaty, dark strands. He kept pulling them as his penis slid on the warm, wet tongue into the contracting throat. It felt so good there was no way he was lasting long. Within seconds the orgasm started building, and shortly after went through his body like an electric shock, blinding his eyes and blocking lungs the entire time he spilled in his boyfriend’s mouth.
-Damn, babe, you’re going to kill me one day. -Jace laughed, trying to catch a breath as his boyfriend shifted to sit beside him.
-Says who? -the archer smiled, resting his head on the shorter Shadowhunter’s shoulder. -Thank you for being so patient with me. -he whispered, grabbing his parabatai’s hand and giving it a squeeze.
-You’re my world, Alec. I’ll never give up on you. -the younger man assured, pressing a fond kiss to his best friend’s head. He loved him way too much to let some minor obstacles break them apart.
And as it turned out, having regular sex, no matter how quick and messy, was essential to keeping their relationship drama-free. Since the hardship passed, with every single day their feelings resumed growth, bond began to strengthen further. They shortly started to discover changes in shared abilities, like suddenly being able to activate each-other runes. Being unable to seek any information on the subject, all the couple could do was to explore those skills and hope nothing bad happens. But as it might’ve been expected, soon enough they ran out of luck.
It started with the crew getting ready to head out to scout a suspected demon nest. Alec and Jace like usual were drawing their runes in seclusion when the door flew wide open, revealing a very not amused Maryse Lightwood.
-I need to see you both in my office. Immediately. -she informed coldly before promptly disappearing from sight, leaving the two half-naked Shadowhunters absolutely horrified.
They had no idea what to expect. It could be anything from a simple warning to getting forcefully separated or even executed. Nevertheless, the pair got dressed, shared their possibly last kiss and promptly went to face the unknown.
-Sit and listen. -Maryse ordered, and the duo obediently complied. -It's my understanding that the two of you have developed romantic feelings for each-other and refuse to ignore them. -she observed, briefly stopping the Shadowhunters’ nervously beating hearts. -I won’t oppose something you have no control over, but I need you to keep it a secret. You know the rules and dire consequences of breaking them. Maybe we do not have the best relationship these days, but you’re my children, and I cannot imagine losing either of you. So please, low profile, don’t make anyone question the closeness of your relation. You’re parabatai, you’re family, you’re certainly not a couple. Is that clear?
The boys only nodded in response, slightly shocked with what their mother just said. They expected the worst case scenario, certainly not an…approval?
-I’m sorry it has to be this way. -Maryse whispered, resignation clear in her eyes. There was nothing she could’ve done but make sure their forbidden relationship stays hidden in order to keep them safe.
-Yeah, we're sorry too. -Alec agreed as they began to get up. -Thanks mom, for you know…not freaking out. -he added, making her smile.
-Go before I change my mind.
Incredibly confused by this non-hostile conversation, although pleased with the outcome, the two Shadowhunters left the office and happily returned to their interrupted mission preparations.
-I still can’t believe Maryse was so chill about finding out. -Jace shook his head, struggling to grasp the concept of them not getting instantly murdered or at least disowned.
-She probably knew longer than we have. -the archer pointed out. -But can we like also not talk about my mother while I’m balls-deep in your cute ass? -he sighed, nudging the side of his parabatai’s neck while his hips pressed forward, making them both moan from the immense pleasure this movement caused.
-Sorry, I’m just still in shock. -the blonde chuckled, melting under the gentle kisses being peppered along his upper spine.
-Mhm, let me distract you then. -Alec suggested, and without any warning, bit hard into his boyfriend’s shoulder, breaking the skin and forcing out a delightful whine.
Jace’s mind quickly began to get fuzzy, limbs went numb. All he could feel was the comforting weight of the archer’s muscular body as he penetrated him impossibly deep, his movements painfully slow and extremely precise, mercilessly hitting those sweet spots that made the younger Shadowhunter whimper in ecstasy.
-Alec…faster…please. -he muttered into the pillow, too horny for them taking their sweet time. The fact they didn’t die today pumped him up full of sexual energy he needed to get rid of ASAP.
-Nope. -Alec disagreed. -We’re gonna take it veeeeery slowly. -he whispered into his parabatai’s ear while demonstrating the new, infuriating pace.
Nevertheless, it felt so fucking good, Jace didn't express any disapproval, willingly allowed his partner to overstimulate him with unrushed tenderness so contradictory to their preferred hasty roughness. Every single thrust deep into his tight insides made his leaking, trapped between his stomach and the mattress cock slide through the silky sheets, an utmost euphoric sensation that quickly brought him to the edge.
-Babe! -he whimpered through the tears of frustrations clouding his eyes. He was unbelievably close, yet not exactly there, in dire need of just a little more stimuli to cross the line and fall right into orgasm’s blissful embrace.
Luckily, the archer understood the assignment perfectly, without changing positions began to fuck his boyfriend so hard and deep he nearly choked when the release hit him unexpectedly and with such force he would’ve screamed in pleasure if his poor throat didn’t close shut. Truly, a mind-fucking-blowing experience.
-Oh man, I think I’m in love with you. -the blonde exhaled heavily after rolling onto his back, his limbs tingling from the prolonged lack of movement.
-Think? You so are. -Alec chuckled, plastering himself to his lover’s sweaty chest, happily leaning into the warm hand fondly rubbing his spine. It was very healing, just them two sharing a silent moment following an earth-shattering sex. At those rare times nothing existed but their forbidden love they could never take outside a closed room.
-I want us to redo our runes. -Jace informed out of nowhere, surprising them both with this proposition.
He actually thought about this before, deepening their already strong bond by carving it into each-other's bodies with blades. This wasn't by any means a recognized technique, rarely even mentioned in old scrolls, but there was no harm, other than physical, in trying. They've already broken all the rules, might as well do something utterly outrageous for the sake of their happiness.
-What? -the archer frowned, glancing up at the younger man in slight confusion. -You mean…the parabatai runes?
-Yup. -the blonde confirmed confidently. -I wanna do it properly, old school blood exchange.
-Okay. Let’s do it. -the older Shadowhunter’s face instantly brightened up as he was clearly overjoyed with this unconventional, but utterly romantic idea. He then swiftly pulled himself up and joined their lips in a tender, affectionate kiss before adding:
That didn't happen right away of course. Helping Clary find her mother turned out to be more complicated and demanding than any of them anticipated. Weeks went by before the couple managed to get some free, alone time to proceed with this symbolic ceremony.
-I can't believe we're doing this. -Alec shook his head as they kneeled down in front of each-other in some long forgotten basement room, away from interruptions and unwanted witnesses. -In a good way. -he clarified, seeing a flash of uncertainty in his best friend’s eyes.
-Me too. -Jace whispered, his heart overflowing with warm emotions. He was so happy this was finally happening, them becoming even more than they already were. -I love you, Alexander Gideon Lightwood. -he smiled, his eyes tearing up already.
-I love you too, Jonathan Christopher Lightwood. -the archer grinned, gently wiping away a single tear flowing down his life-partner’s face.
-I don't recall us getting married. -the blonde frowned playfully, his cheeks instantly turning bright red. The sole thought of them becoming husbands was too much for him. But if they only could, he would’ve married him in a heartbeat. No doubts, no hesitations. They were destined to be together, marriage at this point would be a pure formality.
-What do you think this is then? -Alec chuckled, gently poking his boyfriend’s parabatai rune with the tip of the knife. -I can’t wait for our connection to get even stronger. -he whispered, slowly pressing the sharp blade harder, puncturing the thick skin on top of the dark scarring, making the younger man gasp at the painful, but certainly pleasant sensation.
In amazement, he watched the archer skillfully carve the familiar shape onto the existing pattern, line by line bringing them closer. Jace could sense their connection deepen with every drop of blood shed. His whole body was burning, spirit vibrating, brain crashing from this overpowering, intoxicating feeling. It was impossible to describe the emotions going through him at that moment. Truly, a heavenly experience.
He was so overwhelmed by it, he didn't even notice when Alec finished carving the rune, completed the first half of their sacred ritual.
-You okay my love? -the archer asked quietly, gently pulling the trembling, sobbing Shadowhunter into an affectionate hug in an attempt to calm him down before they proceed any further.
-Better than ever. -the blonde murmured, resting his pounding head on the archer's shoulder. For some reason, he couldn’t stop crying, the amount of love pouring into his chest was messing him up in the best way possible. -I don't wanna wait. -he whispered shortly after, firmly pushing himself away and confidently grabbing the bloody knife. -Your turn.
The second he pressed the blade to that chiselled abdomen, his wide open soul began to merge with the one of his beloved parabatai, instantly hazing his sight and numbing his nerves. By sole muscle memory he traced the rune, wrapping them in blissful warmth and divine ecstasy the closer he was to its end. And when he finally got there, an explosion occurred in their racing hearts. They blindly dropped into each-other's arms, holding on for dear lives whilst the euphoric wave flooded their spinning minds and shaking bodies.
It wasn’t anything like their official ceremony. The strength of those confessed emotions raised the intensity through the roof, shattering their world and building it anew. Everything they felt didn’t belong only to them anymore, as if the bond evolved, melting two separate spirits into one. It made both no sense and perfect sense.
-We share a soul, there is nothing that can separate us. -Alec murmured, withdrawing from the hug to pull his partner into his arms. -Not even death. -he added, pressing a featherlight kiss to those bright strands.
Jace didn’t say a word. There was no need to. He melted into the touch, silently enjoyed the soft affection resonating through his boyfriend’s skin and allowed himself to forget, just for a moment, that their beautiful feelings are a sin, one they will eventually have to pay for.
And when that time comes, there will be no regrets.
Because this short love story was definitely worth a tragic ending.