“You are so brave and quiet I forget you are suffering.”
— Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms (via books-n-quotes)

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“You are so brave and quiet I forget you are suffering.”
— Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms (via books-n-quotes)

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.”
— Dr Spock
The Mr. Darcy Fantasy isn’t based in what it’s usually made out to be based in
The fantasy isn’t that a brooding “tall, dark and handsome” man will come and swoop you of your feet.
Darcy changes for Elizabeth. She rejects him, she stands up to him, she insults him in a magnitude of ways, both warranted and not, and he takes all of that, and he reflects on it, and he changes his behavior. He tries to be better. Because he respects Elizabeth and he finds her opinion valuable.
Think about it. A usual response, both back then and today, would be to dismiss Elizabeth as a “crazy bitch.” He doesn’t do that at all, no, he takes valid criticism found among misunderstandings and takes it to heart.
The Mr. Darcy Fantasy is a fantasy about being respected and having your opinion be valued very highly.
The Mr. Darcy Fantasy is that a man would be willing to change his behavior just to be worthy of you.
P&P gets called the template of the modern rom-com a lot, but rereading it as an adult, one thing I found surprisingly refreshing EVEN TODAY is that after Lizzie rejects him and makes it clear she’s not interested…
He backs off.
Like, he sends her the long ass letter to apologize for his screwups and clear up the more serious misunderstandings (which, in the case of Wickham, is doing her a solid), but he *actually stays away*. Not in the sense of suddenly doing a 180 and doubling down on his bad attitude and making things uncomfortable to “punish” her for rejecting him–in fact, he’s very civil and welcoming when *she* appears unexpectedly at his place. But he actually respects her wishes by not bothering her anymore. Not trying to change her mind. Not hounding her for a second chance. Not badgering her with shit like “WHY ARE YOU DENYING THIS OBVIOUS PASSION BETWEEN US”. In fact, he doesn’t even propose again until he actually has a good reason to believe she’s changed her mind.
Even in modern romances, that’s pretty refreshing! Obsessive behavior and flagrant ignoring of stated boundaries are still so heavily romanticized–the idea that if they’re REALLY in love with you, a “real man” won’t stop hounding women until they give in. But that’s not what happens here. It’s a shame, honestly, that this part of P&P still feels like a breath of fresh air today.
Also, re the “bad boy reformed by the love of a good woman” fantasy: in a lot of other examples, what you’ll see is some prick consistently failing, but then suddenly changing his ways because “I can’t live without you”. Darcy changes because of Elizabeth, but it’s explicitly stated that it’s not with the ulterior motive of winning her back. He changes on his own, when they’re apart, because he actually heard what she had to say and realized she was right. Even if he’d screwed things up with her, he still wanted to be a better person. It’s not “her love” that changes him, it’s not that “if you really loved me, you’d change”, it’s that he sincerely wants to improve himself.
Swoon.
YES.
I especially love how Austen deliberately contrasts Darcy with Mr. Collins, who, when he’s rejected by Elizabeth, REFUSES to leave her alone and basically steamrollers over her objections, telling her she’s just playing hard to get, she doesn’t have any better options, he’s a nice guy with a house and a job, and who does she think she is, anyway?
Darcy is SO refreshing by comparison. ❤️
New Bechdel-like test for gay/lesbian romance films:
Your gay characters cannot:
Have an illegal or otherwise creepy age gap.
Cheat on each other or anyone else (especially not if the cheating is portrayed as romantic).
Die tragically, violently or AT ALL.
To all the people in the notes going “but but tragedy is a valid form of…” Yeah, sorry, straights broke it with decades of nothing but tragedy for LGBT characters. This is a moratorium on all such tragedy films with tragic endings for at least the next 50-75 years at which point there will be a review to determine if mainstream media has EARNED it.
From 1922 to 1968 the Motion Picture Production Code (commonly known as the Hays Code) enforced rules regarding the treatment of gay characters in tv and film. Homosexuality and gender nonconformity could be acknowledged, but it had to be punished to show that consequences would come from such “immorality.” Showing these characters as creepy, predatory, unfaithful, etc etc was common, and for decades pretty much every queer or queer coded character was brutally murdered. The homophobic tropes born from the Hays code are pervasive in media today. The sheer amount of tragedy and violence written into queer media in the last century has in the long term damaged people’s perceptions of what queer stories are “supposed” look like. New Bechdel-like test for gay/lesbian romance films: If your queer piece of media complies with the Hays code, start over.

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adult person: life gets faster as you get older!
me aged 10: sounds fake but ok
me now:
I need this man ASAP
When you’re iron deficient and someone threatens you with a sword
“A long-term study of children raised by lesbians found that these children were less likely to suffer from physical and sexual abuse than were their peers who were raised by heterosexuals. This is thought to be due to the absence of adult heterosexual men in the households (Gartrell, Bos, & Goldberg, 2010). Girls raised by lesbians tend to have higher self-esteem, show more maturity and tolerance than their peers, and are older when they have their first heterosexual contact (Gartrell et al., 2005, 2010). Children raised by same-sex parents seem to be less constrained by traditional gender roles; boys are less aggressive, and girls are more inclined to consider nontraditional careers, such as doctor, lawyer, or engineer (Gartrell et al., 2005; Stacey & Biblarz, 2001). Over the course of more than 20 years, scientists studied the psychological adjustment of 78 teenagers who were raised by lesbian mothers. Compared to age-matched counterparts raised by heterosexual parents, these adolescents were rated higher in social, academic, and total competence, and lower in social problems, rule-breaking, aggression, and externalizing problem behavior (Gartrell & Bos, 2010). There are fewer studies of children raised by two men, but gay fathers are more likely than straight fathers to put their children before their career, to make big changes in their lives to accommodate a child, and to strengthen bonds with their extended families after becoming fathers (Bergman, Rubio, Green, & Padrone, 2010).” ~ Martha Rosenthal, Human Sexuality: From Cells to Society, p.247.
“having gay parents will harm children”
I love that this is cited and sourced ahhhh. Actual researched support! So good.

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🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃
suc*ing dick is the best activity ever there i said it
This was so ridiculously drawn out and the conclusion was so obvious yet still I couldn’t tell where this was going

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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祝福体操小花们 made a montage of the skills/connections Tingx2 has trained/attempted/competed over the years.
She trained a double tuck 1/1 off beam?!!
Conditional Immortality of Lobsters
Death by squeezing: Heroic
Death by disease: Just