Hiya

having anti role models is a beautiful thing. it's not easy to live up to someone else's behavior but it is easy to lasso yourself into behaving right when you realize you're reminding yourself of the worst person youve ever met in your entire life

Had my suspicions but I have finally confirmed it this morning: The rival Pokémon Go team I have been beefing with, whose gym's total annihilation I have incorporated into my morning routine, is actually a group of local elementary school students

I always wondered why the Pokémon at this gym were so weak but today I left the house before the local students get picked up by the schoolbus and I saw a group of kids congregating around the gym pokestop and I was like "Oh no"

Congrats on being promoted to pokemon villain

I love when fiction makes the audience feel guilty about their role as the audience. When something fucked up is treated as a joke but later it's recognised how fucked up it was and the audience feels guilty for finding it funny. When a character breaks the fourth wall to plead for help, and you can't do anything so you just watch. And you know that the characters pain isn't real, but they're begging for help and you're not helping because their suffering is entertainment for you

House would have figured out what’s wrong with Will Graham after nearly killing him and would have been like oh yeah also your therapist has been feeding you poison chicken soup that’s why you’re getting worse, probably should check his freezer too the guys not subtle with the cannibalism. But it’s easy to miss all this when you’re getting bent over the therapy chair instead of sitting in it.

History

not what I thought they was talkin about

just spent half an hour waiting for a pizza i hadn't even ordered yet. never let your enemy know your next move.

Who is the enemy in this situation? The people cooking the pizza?

im the enemy in this situation

literally any upper middle class tiktok self-identified ‘that girl’ in a pastel workout set with a thirteen step skincare routine and a green juice is a million times closer to being patrick bateman irl than any self-identified sigma film bro

op managed to swing a bat at 2 hornets nests in one go

"A ship can never truly love an anchor." dude shut up. a ship without an anchor gets dashed against the rocks. it's useless, completely at the whim of the currents. a ship loves an anchor so much it carries it everywhere it goes. the anchor gives the ship the world to love. dude.

oh no my pornography is turning into an angst-filled character study

Oh no my angst-filled character study is turning into pornography

kind of obsessed with my dad's friend who apparently goes back to being a Buddhist whenever he gets a divorce

[gets divorced] Alright, that's it! No more worldly desire! [sees another beautiful woman] Well... unless?

I love that it’s apparently happened enough times that it’s a cycle. Almost like…

just saw someone say they were "hyperfixated" on cooking with seasonal squash i love that nothing means anything

i’m seriously traumadumping pepper all over these boiled eggs

I’m gaslighting my stove