Vibrant Radiance

Right now our world seems to be on the verge of crisis. Which means, most (if not all of us) are experiencing extra tension, stress, struggle & potentially distress. Some people have recently lost jobs. Some are dealing with death, loss & grief. Some of us, especially those in third world countries, are starting to deal with starvation or have been struggling with tremendous financial difficulties. No one can say they’ve evaded the extra pressure this year’s challenges have brought us. We are all in this extra pressure zone together.

Maybe it’s the collective shadow surfacing, revealing itself to be lovingly embraced by the light of our awareness. Is all we’ve worked to keep hidden coming up for resolution? Is all we’ve diligently worked so hard to suppress rearing its ugly head, so it can be made known? Is this a collective shift in which the unconscious is being made conscious?

Regardless of whether this is a collective ‘dark night of the soul’ or not, it is stressful. We can all feel the added pressure. Life has always been a grand mystery, but this year that truth has become blatantly clear to all of us. Just when we thought everything was just the way it was, the ground beneath our feet began to shift. This year has been a brilliant experience of everyone now having to ‘dance the mystery’. Meaning none of us can be certain of how tomorrow is going to unfold. What a delicious truth we’ve now all had to face. Life isn’t stagnant, stationary or always directly clear. We cannot ever know exactly how it’s all going to unfold.

The transition spaces are always the most challenging. Once we’ve found our groove, things feel easier. The great unknown may not ever be fully known, so part of life is making peace with uncertainty. The master knows this. Becoming comfortable with discomfort isn’t easy, but it is a requirement in actualizing peace. But until we’ve found ‘sure footing’ in the sand, we often feel beaten by the unending waves of change. Transitions are so challenging because everything seems to be unfolding without precision. So many of the details are left completely unknown.

It’s easier to be at peace when we know what’s going on. It’s easier to feel calm when there’s no storm. But true self mastery is to become the peace IN the storm. It’s to be in the eye of the hurricane, unnerved by the chaos all around. If anything, this year & this shifting time our world finds itself in, is the perfect time for us to become more refined as masters of our own experience. So how do we go about doing that?

If you’re on the conscious path, you most likely have experienced a certain sense of wellbeing & peace that’s not dependent on circumstance. Just because something did or didn’t go your way, you felt good anyway. Maybe you didn’t get upset about something that used to make you feel insecure. Or maybe when you were cut off in traffic you didn’t let it get to you. These are examples of being present & honoring what the sacred moment offers us while not attaching our sense of wellbeing to whether it suits our preferences or not. This spacious presence feels alive & enthralled, even if nothing exciting is going on. This is the space in which we are open to the gloriousness of life even while experiencing seemingly mundane aspects. There is a joy we can experience no matter what scenarios may be unfolding.

However, it is common that when we are afraid we feel compelled to pull back. When we experience pain we often strike up resistance to what is. When we experience discomfort we may decide to drag our feet to avoid the hard feelings as long as possible. However, avoidance of what is is not possible. So we drag our feet & energetically resist & throw a temper tantrum as a way to ‘protest’ against that which isn’t suiting our preferences. We think we are standing firm in our fight against as a way to justify why the pain or discomfort sucks. We resist as a proclamation of ‘no, that’s not what I’m interested in.’ How silly us humans are.

The funny thing about resistance is that it’s actually the root cause of our suffering.

“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.” -Dalai Lama

It’s not the circumstances that cause our distress. It’s our perspectives about the circumstances that really define how we experience life. We can fight against while kicking & screaming our way through life. That absolutely is a choice we can make. But that choice makes us feel that much more pained than life actually needs to be. So how is it that we turn this fight against into grace, ease & joyful flow?

Making peace with the not peace is the surest way to ease our resistance to what is. What this means is that we become okay with things not feeling okay. We make peace with the notion that our security isn’t necessarily assured. We accept that our physical safety isn’t guaranteed. We come to accept, embrace & appreciate the fact that life is always going to be unpredictable. We must become comfortable with the uncomfortable feelings we experience when things aren’t ‘all set’.

True peace is to accept everything, even the not peace. If we’re sad, angry, upset or in distress, we can honor those experiences also. We can honor ourselves with tender gentle love even while we are experiencing the energetic states of ‘not peace’. We can be grateful for life even when the winds of change are vast upon us. We can master being in touch with our playful innocence even when we don’t have all our preferences met. We can know that life is unfolding however it unfolds & no matter what, all is well. Even if we start to become as unsteady as the chaos around us, we can still recognize there’s a still silent spacious calm that exists as our center, even if it far eludes us in that moment. As soon as we accept the ‘not peace’, peace permeates us.

Everyone's heard the expression just be positive. But it's not always just about being positive, it's really about being authentic. We can speak all about love and light, but the feelings we are experiencing, whether on the surface or deep inside, are the real indicators of our energetic frequency.  

We create our reality by our vibrational frequency, our energy, our e-motion (energy in motion). Our intentions to be happy and feel good has infinite value. But one must resolve the deepest inner fear and energetic resistance, which is expressed as negative emotions, to really embody authentic positivity and be in a state of constant allowance, love and compassion. Otherwise we are running towards the light to escape our darkness and we'll unconsciously react every time we are triggered, judge all that we have denied within and at least partially, create our lives in a way that reflects our innermost fears.      

How to resolve fear:    

Our fears are emotions which stem from our subconscious limiting beliefs and thoughts such as I am not safe. I am not secure. I am unworthy. I am alone. Everyone's against me. I cannot trust. I am insufficient or any other thought of seeming lack in who we are in relation to the world around us, the universe or our life. These subconscious beliefs and thoughts come out as unconscious reactions when our insecurities and deepest fears are triggered.    

Let's say we feel like there's not enough time and lash out when our child throws a fit and makes us late. We may get angry because we feel strained and this seeming lack of time makes us feel insecure. So we get angry as a defense mechanism to make us feel we are in control, and in essence, to make us feel more secure. Anger is always a defense mechanism we utilize to try and ‘take back our power’ in order to make our self feel more safe and secure. Not feeling safe and secure is the root fear/belief/thought that needs to be resolved.   

Since so many of us have early childhood trauma that has yet to be resolved, we carry these inner fears with us, reacting when triggered, but not fully addressing the root core fears. Whenever we are triggered, it's because these deep inner fears are being tested within our current scenario. We must allow ourselves to really feel our emotions every time we are triggered, without having any judgment, in order to follow them to our root core insecurities deep within. When we allow the emotions to reside within our Presence (without judgment or ridicule or trying to force them to be different), we can ask our self 'when did I first feel this emotion'. Our subconscious will automatically go back to the source of the initial time this fear originated. We may remember an experience from childhood that we felt unsafe or not secure, maybe where our innocence wasn't acceptable, our vulnerabilities were used against us, where our power was seemingly taken away or where we just didn't feel ok just as we were.     

We must NOT judge that innocent and vulnerable part of our self, but instead remain compassionate. We must NOT coax that aspect to change or try to convince it to be stronger, but instead acknowledge the pain we felt as being painful and accepting that we felt betrayed, hurt, etc. That aspect doesn’t want to be denied and will not resolve if it feels rejected once again by us, but will only be soothed by the compassionate acknowledgment and embrace of our Presence. Embracing that wounded innocence/inner child into the warmth of our bosom/heart center will allow it to feel safe and will integrate it. We must honor that wounded innocence by acknowledging its cries and allowing it to exist as an aspect of our experience, integrated within the wholeness we are as divine Presence experiencing physical life.

What may seem childish or what we judge as being weak is our most vulnerable self as a dependent child again feeling rejected by us through our judgments. In essence, we are again saying that aspect isn't good enough just as it is when we determine that we should just suck it up and be more courageous or stronger. By forcing ourselves to not feel the pain, we are denying that aspect within. By forcing ourselves to feel positive when we don’t naturally already do, we are suppressing our innermost pains. By seeking comfort through external means such as alcohol, marijuana, relationships, sex, validation, attention, compulsions of all kinds, etc. we are numbing our pain and letting it continue unacknowledged. By invalidating the feelings, we are continuing the pain.

Sometimes the experiences that traumatize us seem ridiculous and small or just plain silly. That's because we are seeing it strictly from our perspective as an able adult. But from the vulnerable child's view, we did feel unsafe or unworthy or whatever. So we must see and feel it from that view again, by allowing ourselves to feel the emotions fully and having the fears wash over us by not resisting them at all; being in a state of absolute allowance. Let it 'overcome' you, so you remember how your most vulnerable aspect felt; alone, deprived, unable to express, powerless, unsafe, needy, etc. Then when you acknowledge that experience without judgment you honor your inner child.

Knowing in pure Presence we are inherently safe, and now as an able adult, using our voice and our choice, we never have to let that inner child feel powerless or be abused again. We can voice boundaries to ensure our preferences, and we can choose to participate in that which helps us thrive. We no longer are subject to the traumas that created these fears and we can let our inner child know it's safe to express itself and safe to thrive now within our presence. Acknowledge and embrace that vulnerable aspect with the purity of our presence to honor our whole self and resolve the fear.  

Then the next time we are triggered, we will soon realize it's our insecurity crying out, and we can soothe that aspect with our compassionate presence and awareness. We will do this quicker and quicker each time we are triggered until we are no longer triggered at all, because that aspect has been integrated into the confident yet humble, trusting, loving and capable presence we most authentically exist as.  

We must honor our inner child (and integrate it) every time we feel doubt, fear, insecurity, lack of safety, take offense or feel defensive, are triggered and every time we judge our self or another in order to resolve all our fears. We will become fearless by living in the moment fully and embracing all that is with the compassion of our heart (absolute allowance and absolute self compassion always). We needn't get stuck in the past or focus on what was in order for these emotions to surface. Our Now moment will always bring us unresolved emotions in the form of resistance, fear, doubt, judgment, defensiveness or feeling any sense of lack at all. When we feel all our emotions, embrace all with compassion and focus on what makes our heart sing, we will be fearless, naturally authentically positive and therefore effectively start to create the life of our greatest dreams!