Home Of Mischief & Mayhem

[Overkill is made by Pedro and Sam]

transcript below:

This time on Overkill: Dawn does his friendship quests to get back into the Clocktower.

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Bumping into a door or accidentally slamming the fridge shut and saying, “Sorry darling.” The lights flicks and they go to the breaker box with encouraging, “You can do it beautiful, you got this,” as they try and get the power back on. Throwing something away and absentmindedly saying, “Thank you, baby,” to the garbage for taking their trash.

Then the dateviators come and they suddenly become so aware that they probably shouldn’t call people they barely know pet names so it all stops. One day they put on the dateviators to see a small crowd gathered looking a mixed between annoyed, worried, sad.

Bev: “Did we do something to upset you?”

Dorian: “You can be honest. We just want to know if you’re alright.”

MC: ?????

Cam: “It’s been weeks.”

MC: “Since???”

Freddy: “Well… you know, Cool Kid.”

Cam (pissed): “Don’t act like you don’t know, baby.”

Thats when it clicks that everyone misses the sweet nicknames and wants to be doted on again. Its cleared up that the MC isnt mad and was just trying not to be weird, but clearly should go back to calling everyone pet names.

Like I said, the museum was a pretty snotty institution. It’s got a LOT of objects it’s way famous for possessing, but nobody knew about the absolutely massive collection of Moche erotic pottery it had because the curators were totally embarrassed by this stuff.

Some examples:

Pretty hot shit, right? They never, ever put any of this stuff on public view or published it in any catalogues but - we legit had like several hundred pieces of Moche ceramics in the “dirty pots” category. Anyway, I was left alone to just do my job with regard to the database for several years, ok? And I figured, well, these’re accessioned objects in the museum’s collection - better get down to bidness. 

I catalogued every goddamn bestiality, necrophiliac, cocksucking, buttfucking, detached penis, and giant vulva drinking cup in that collection. I’d be like, 

A drinking vessel in form of a standing man wearing a tunic and cap. He holds an oversized erection in his hands and stares into the distance (note I did not say “like he’s hella-constipated”). The vessel has a hole at both the tip of the penis as well as around the rim of the figure’s head, thus forcing the drinker to drink only from the penis or risk spilling wine all over themselves from the top of the vessel. Red and orange slip covers the surface of the piece.

Pretty straightforward, right? Apparently the deep seated fear of these objects that the curators exhibited was meant to spread to me as well, but - no one ever gave me that memo, because I guess Midwesterners reproduce asexually. When the curators understood that I had catalogued all of these objects in addition to the other, non-sexy pieces in the collection, they were apparently livid, but knew they had no legs to stand on in terms of getting pissed at me for it. 

I visited the museum’s online public access database a few years back and - every single description I wrote of these pieces has been totally neutered to say something like Male figural vase.