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what a privilege it is to live a messy life...
ANNIHILATION (2018) dir. Alex Garland
“AI art is okay if you’re just making shitposts”
Have you forgotten our roots
reblogging this with my own masterpiece

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(Gibson ’82 Les Paul Custom -Silverburst-)
Sulfur combusts on contact with air to create stunning blue lava-like rivers of light in the Kawah Ijen crater on the island of Java | Ph: Olivier Grunewald
illustration by Yoji Shinkawa
last summer i went to see NIN live in Vienna, and on the way home i immediately sketched the moments that were the most memorable to me! (an unexpected bit of Zero Sum that made me cry; projections during Copy of a; and Robin & Trent interacting with the audience a little bit) ( i highly recommend looking up the footage for this gig ! ) since i got the B stage rail, i've been really close to the band half of the time. i also high-fived trent reznor :P

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In the Rush.
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the backrooms movie made me realize that my deepest fear isn't monsters or labyrinths or even death. it's failure.
seeing clark divorced, struggling with money, no friends, sitting and drinking and festering in his own self pity brought tears to my eyes faster than anything ever had before.
I saw him out of breath hopping around on the peg leg with the pirate impression talking about how you don't even need credit to buy from him and I was so close to sobbing it wasn't even funny. putting on a face when you're breaking down inside with no hope is terrifying to me.
I was so sad during the kitchen table scene because everything Mary said was true, he was lost now. It's like seeing someone you wished would succeed just give up and fall asleep in their grave.
Clark is gonna stick with me for a long time.
This. Clark's character is so very tragic to me. It's a powerful example of learned helplessness gone haywire. I think it's one of the most effective cautionary tales because *so many* people could very easily turn out like him.
Clark truly felt helpless in life, and as a result, he would continuously find blame in external factors. This gave him a false sense of control, without realizing that doing this only fed into the cycle of him being perpetually stuck in life.
He desperately wanted agency over his life, yet he feared the uncertainty that comes with that agency. He felt trapped by the various circumstances, but in reality, he was the one trapping himself by remaining stagnant.
Clark is a deeply flawed person. The role-play scenes make this very clear. His behavior is destructive towards his wellbeing, it hurts those around him, and he only falls further down into his ways (it's just the way he's "wired", as he claimed). It's a downward spiral.
And in the end, when it came to the choice to change... he rejected it. This unhealthy coping mechanism of his... it feels safe, it feels familiar, and it makes him *feel* in control... and when Clark finally made that decision to continue this cycle... that decision ate him alive... literally.
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Back to the original post, yeah... this was also the scariest part of the movie to me. It's a very uncomfortable wake-up call, and I'm sure a lot of people feel hesitant to admit that they see parts of themselves in Clark's character. It doesn't feel pleasant to see it so vividly, but that's the significance of the story. It shows one of the worst outcomes of what could happen to someone's life if they let feelings of learned helplessness take over.
GHOST IN THE SHELL 1995 | dir. Mamoru Oshii
I have just come home from my trip to Berlin and it was honestly kinda surreal seeing the Rammstein instruments
I loooooove the glitter guitar so much.
HEALTH

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For anyone wondering, the PhD student's name is Myra Cheng.
Here's a link to an article about the study from the Stanford Report: link.
Across three preregistered studies, participants interacting with sycophantic AI became more convinced of their own rightness and less willing to repair relationships. Yet at the same time, participants rated sycophantic AI models as higher quality, more trustworthy, and more desirable for future use, which may explain why this behavior has persisted despite its harmful impacts.
Myra Cheng et al. "Sycophantic AI decreases prosocial intentions and promotes dependence." Science 391, eaec8352 (2026).
This is an interesting read, and it covers exactly why I've always felt put off by ChatGPT.
ChatGPT always speaks with this undertone of praise, even when you're just trying to get facts from it. It treats your statements, observations, and questions like they're something profound and revolutionary, even if it's something simple.
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