avery-20-they/them

Once again the government tries to conceal the existence of dragons from us.

[teen sister in a 90’s movie voice] my pronouns are what/ever/major/loser now get out of my room

[obnoxious younger brother voice] yeah mom, I told loser it's time for dinner. ... ow, quit it, I'm respecting your pronouns—

wait THAT’S why my wife always says “son boy allowed” about our cat??

happy 5 years to son boy allowed

Son boy is old enough to read the son boy allowed sign

Can “Joan, normal people don’t do that” be added to the “Harold, they’re lesbians” litany?

Seconded.

If u want to write a story about a character that's just you but hotter with a dark twisted backstory and magical powers and a pet falcon or something, I think u should just go ahead and do that. Who's gonna stop you? The government?? Fuck the police.

What if someone barges in, points at said character and scream, “Mary Sue!”

Tell them to come back with a warrant

This post came across my dash again and now I am having an absolute blast with self insert hotter me that gets the girls and guys everywhere.

This is the Way

Reblogging because I am very pro-writing whatever the hell you want, even ”bad” things, and also because “tell them to come back with a warrant” BROKE ME

i appreciate reblogs so i can get a lot if responses

cats will be like oh you're walking somewhere? no WE'RE walking somewhere. and i will get there first. where is 'there' btw

A guest just came by my front desk and said “it’s my husband’s birthday today, make sure you say happy birthday when he comes down!” and I love it so much it reminds me of that post that’s like “if I was dating just some guy I would hype him up so much I would walk in and say here comes the most specialist boy make sure you clap and cheer when he comes in or I’ll blow this whole building up” you know that post, but it literally just happened to me in real life.

Update: they just came back in from eating dinner at a local restaurant I recommended, and I asked the specialist boy in the world how his Special Birthday Dinner was and what he got to eat, and he began to gush about this lasagna he had, and in the background I saw the wife nod in approval that I had acknowledged her Most Specialist Boy’s birthday.

I know we are all like "people in caveman times would drill holes in their head to relieve headaches" andwe go oh that's so stupid that's so dumb but like. then I get a headache and I'm like.ooooh I get it I get it. Grug prepare the drill.

hey kids following me seriously don’t smoke…i know the commercials are fucking annoying but that doesn’t make it worth it and quitting is hard, i haven’t had a cig in like six months and i still get bad cravings and think about smoking every other day

that includes vaping, ESPECIALLY cheap vapes you buy online from like e-bay. If you’re going to vape then get a good-quality one from a reputable source otherwise it can hurt you really badly. But don’t start a nicotine addiction if you don’t already have one. It’s really, really not worth it. I’m not going to use scare tactics or bash you or talk down to you if you already smoke or vape but it’s just some friendly advice.

Don’t start smoking unless you want to ruin every long flight or long train ride or anything where you’re forced to be inside for a long period of time and unable to smoke. Smoking makes these situations like long flights, train rides, or anything that makes you stuck inside for a while complete agony. Don’t start in the first place.

Smoking and vaping is fucking rampant among people with EDs so

was unaware of those last two bits. and to my followers, PLEASE don’t start. its totally not worth it. I come from a family of smokers and had my experiences with it too. not fun in the slightest and just ends badly if you let it continue.

I want to add that the same two points about smoking while on estrogen also apply to people who use oral contraceptives (that contain estrogen) and smoke.