just the randomness of my life

why does it seem like no matter where you go on a college campus there is always a straight couple with a solid 10-14 inch height difference clinging to each other like one of them is an orphan being sent to the english countryside during ww2 and they’re not sure if they’ll ever see each other again standing in the middle of wherever you’re trying to walk 

As a former catholic I can tell you the accuracy of these statements is spot fucking on

@passionatewriter07

every time john mulaney talks about growing up catholic my 11 years of catholic school flash before my eyes like the heated visions that i’ll be having in hell

power move: make a d&d character with the same name as your dm

#but with ‘cool’ in front of it

this creature is perfect. there is nothing wrong with it.

mother fucker unlimited …

Proof that there is perfection on earth

u lucky he holdin me back bitch on antartica i woulda slept u

hoodies are one of the most powerful and underappreciated articles of clothing. cold? put on a hoodie. raining? put on a hoodie. no bra? put on a hoodie. nothing to wear? hoodie. cripplingly low self esteem? you already know. so versatile! so multifaceted!