You know often I look at my life and look at others peoples life that I know.. Start to feel like shit. My Childhood friend and his wife had a baby shower. An event that I suddenly got invited to. I havent spoke to him in years.. and all of a sudden I get this invite from his mom. I didn't want to go but I didnt exactly have a choice. I show up and felt like I didn't even belong there. This is the guys 3rd child. The guy who seems to have a lot people invensted in him. Then suddenly I just felt like shit deep down. He's found someone and started a family of his own,got a good paying job and people like him. Then you look at me. I dont have anyone, I dont feel like I'm good enough, I have had a job that kinda pays alright but insnt really dependable in a sense. I knew he was better than me and may just be something I shouldnt be thinking about or a feeling I shouldnt be feeling or even a feeling a I could use a motivation to do something with myself but it just kinda kept nagging at me. A lot of people around me gave me that feeling and they didnt even know it. Don't get me wrong I'm happy for him. You could say I'm a bit jealous... okay maybe just totally jealous but just not doing stupid shit to sabotage him or nothing. Idk
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