Are They A Villain? Or Just Heartbroken?

writing is so hard i want to be praised for all my most clever lines right now

everyone is like ‘writing is so isolating’ but i write three lines and immediately hit up all my friends for attention like im a cat who’s never been fed

I think there needs to be more stories about friends who are almost lovers. who are closer then anything in the world. who can read each others minds. who appreciate how beautiful and impressive the other is. and then have them absolutely destroyed by their own personal events and have that bond twist around like a broken electric cable until it snaps under the pressure of incompatible lives. and then that love turns to hate and then to a haunting.

i want a shirt that has a QR code on it for some kind of horrible malware so that if anyone ever tries to film me in public their phone will automatically scan the code and be reduced to a functionless brick

Modern day Medusa

Thanks to a typo in the contract, the professor gained complete mastery of all the knowledge in the heavens and the earth, in exchange for his soup.

Because shockingly when people enjoy what they do (you make it enjoyable instead of just hammering on them) people WANT to do things!

Where is the button to shout this from the rooftop?

the influx of pornbots is so funny. we're out in our little paddleboat like "oh the rats are swarming again. auspices for the new year." and in the background the S.S. Twitter is floating past upside down.

opening tumblr is like stepping into the woods at night and listening to the chaotic screams of wandering spirits

Item: Villain Sweater

I WOULD LIKE ONE IN EVERY COLOR

what in gods name am i looking at

the left side is where i place my typing orb

okay tumblr’s exclusion from the twitter social media ban list is hilarious but genuinely we do not belong on there. if a real human person asks “where can i find you on social media” and your choice is a swift death or revealing your tumblr, most of us would simply expire. half of y’all change urls every week like you’re in witness protection. just imagine for one second attaching your wholeass government name to your latest two am clownposting and tell me that didn’t send a cold chill down your spine. the only place i ever want to see the words “connect with me on tumblr!” is on the ao3 profile of an author i’m actively stalking. anyone in the world can follow me except anyone i personally know. antisocial media.

#the only people in real life who know i am on tumblr are people i met on tumblr

Jane Austen really said ‘I respect the “I can fix him” movement but that’s just not me. He’ll fix himself if knows what’s good for him’ and that’s why her works are still calling the shots today.